"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Kinda got dropped last night by my girl.

M

MattR1984

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Update: She called me around an hour ago. Said she thought about what I said but kinda feels the same way that we would have problems down the road and both of us be hurt more then we are now. I told her I feel the same way. We shouldn't be together wished her luck and wrapped up the conversation right afterwards. No small talk or anything. I'm going out with a married couple who I'm friends with this weekend and there single friend who gave me her number months back before I started dating the recent EX I'm speaking about in the thread. Only deal is she's about an hour away but I can always do that and the distance will allow easy play with more local girls at the same time. Thanks for the advice gentlemen.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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H

hudpes

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Harry Wilmington said:
Just as a side note for future reference: anytime a girl dumps you, it's the result of built-up resentment. So, while it may appear to you that things were fine and then you suddenly messed up one day and *poof* she wanted out, the reality is all those "little" arguments you two were having that you thought were no big deal... were actually lowering her interest in you. You may have thought the arguments were resolved, but they weren't - she just wasn't saying anything and hoping that no more arguments would come up. But they did, and that only piled on the resentment she started to feel. Always try to make sure when these little arguments pop up that they actually get resolved FULLY, and - more importantly - that she feels like you actually LISTENED to her and understood where she was coming from. This is not to say that arguments can be fully avoided - they can't - but how you resolve the arguments can be the difference between her sticking around and her skipping town. Good luck!
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Very true. She couldn't sum up all those little things or clearly verbalize how she felt about you, but she needed hard evidence that would confirm her "suspicions". She needed a "nail in the coffin". After it got presented, the matter was settled. It is done. In her mind, she's free of you. You apologizing, promising you will change, makes you weak and it's not what she wants to hear. What she does want to hear is nothing. After that, she might contact you again, but probably not. For all intents and purposes, consider the relationship dead.
 
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