"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Killing automatic responses

Bigsnake

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When I'm about to make an approach I can clear my head and get ready but sometimes when I'm surprised I usually end up saying something really stupid or not thinking of something funny to say.

Most recently I was at a party and a girl walked up next to me and I didn't see her. Ended up elbowing her in the boob... When I realized what happened I just automatically, without even thinking, said, "ohh... sorry."

The one I still kick myself in the arse for... I was at a store and saw this really hot chick... I looked away and before I could look up again she was standing next to me and knew who I was... It shocked the hell out of me and I ended up just talking to her for a second mainly trying to think of who she was... Never even asked for a phone number... still pisses me off...

I've done stuff like this in the past under different situations... Got surprised by something and just blurted out the most AFC thing without thinking.

What can I do to stop doing this kind of stuff? Where I get surprised and need to clear my head quickly before the automatic AFC I still have kicks in.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Raptured Phoenix

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A "DJ" isnt something you whip out only on certain occasions. Practice Practice Practice until the DJ is the autopilot, and the AFC is only used when you consciously make a switch to it.
 

suavedave

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"automatic response

Hey interesting topic.

I noticed the key word "automatic response" and we are definately on the same waveline here. There is a resource, www.eliasweb.at that speaks specifically about automatic responses.



Suave
 

Bigsnake

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Raptured Phoenix, how long does it usually take to get where you're in automatic DJ mode all the time? Because I still feel I'm far from it...

suavedave, That place is sight is kind of odd... Who is the Elias?
 

JT47319

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Considering that if you aren't a Natural who's been gaming women since puberty, it's gonna take a while to catch up to a Natural's skill level. Hundreds of interactions with women (and men).
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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jakethasnake

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Re: "automatic response

Originally posted by suavedave
Hey interesting topic.

I noticed the key word "automatic response" and we are definately on the same waveline here. There is a resource, www.eliasweb.at that speaks specifically about automatic responses.



Suave


What in the hell was that?? :confused:


http://www.eliasweb.at/video.html


This is all that will take to convince you that the people on this site are complete nuts, or at least part of cult. :eek:
 

DJ_Dork

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Dude, it's okay if you say 'you're sorry' for bumping into her breast.
 

Raptured Phoenix

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Originally posted by Bigsnake
Raptured Phoenix, how long does it usually take to get where you're in automatic DJ mode all the time? Because I still feel I'm far from it...
It took me a good 2 months before I was switching to DJ mode automatically, but still noticing the switch, and then after about 3 months I was in DJ mode unless a situation called for me to be an AFC (like in front of my parents.)

I had a really slacker class (teen living) first period, so I could just come in and practice and practice my DJ skills and learn to 'feel' how being in that mindset is.
 
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