"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Kill the Ego or I am the Prize?

V

Voice

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For all you enlightened Dons out there. Which one is it?

I've been going through a personal crisis. Forget girls, I'm trying to discover myself and let go of these deep fears and insecurities. Damm its been tough. I've tried to Be A Man, and it worked yet I still never felt fulfilled. What I just realized the whole 'I am a prize' mentality is totally ego based. It feels good to be high on yourself. To feel like the man is awesome no doubt, but underneath it all I couldn't deny that the same fears and insecurities were still there and I became depressed.

So I've been reading "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle, and it has totally opened up my eyes to why I've been suffering. I've created this persona or ego from all past events in my life and I've been living in fear because of the perceived future. When in truth the only thing you truly have is the present moment. No past events can define who you are. Nobody's opinion defines who you are. You just are.

How can you see yourself as the prize and not have an ego at the same time?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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L

LDBaha

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It's tough it's a big time paradox.

I guess the only way you can actually feel like the prize without being 'ego' based its when You ARE the prize. Become the prize and believe it fully that you are a great guy and that's it.

Just my 2cents
 
A

Al Moh.

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The I am the prize mentality is not about feeding your ego but killing your desperation. It's about putting the focus on you and not on girls.

I think there is a big misunderstanding.

Al summons up two guys and a woman.

First guy: "I am THE PRIZE! I am better then you guys! Damn, I am sooo sexy!"

Now obviously this guy has a big ego. Bad.

Second guy: "Look at this beautiful woman. I'd like to date her. But alas! She's trying to play me. But no, I am the prize, she ought to catch me, I am not going to give in to her games."

This guy has got it right. The Prize mentality is about not supplicating to WOMEN. It has NOTHING to do with feeling better than other people in general, just making you more confident und killing your desire.

Think of yourself as the prize whenever you interact with a pretty woman with the prospect of going for her. But don't boost your ego.
 
H

Hughman

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LDBaha said:
Is that some pook stuff?
Click to expand...
Pook has said it, though I wouldn't be surprised if he lifted that from Anti-Dump.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Voice

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Al moh I know what you're saying. However the first and second guy if you think about it aren't much different. The second guy still identifies himself as the prize. It may be more subtle in the way he does it, but the ego is still there.

Lol the big question is do Buddhism and Bytches mix?
 
V

Voice

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Its tough because these philosophies contradict each other. All I'm looking for is to be happy. Obviously girls aren't going to provide that I learned that. I just want some inner peace and acceptance before I start with girls again.
 
D

DJ Barcardi

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I think its all about the state your feeling. Nimbus state. RSD.
 
M

Maxtro

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The two are independent of each other and yet they are also connected.

Kill the ego:
I'm not going to approach her because she is going to reject me. It's going to make me look bad, I don't want to be embarrassed. She will look down on me etc.

Without an ego you wouldn't about the worry about the consequences. Since you are not worried about your ego being hurt because of a rejection, you ask her out and don't really care about her response.

I am the prize:
This is about believing and knowing that you are good enough. She is the one who has to prove herself to you. You are full of confidence and self-esteem.

How they work together
When you know that you are the prize you are not worried about rejection. Protecting your ego is not a concern.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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L

Lexington

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As stated by others, believing yourself to be the prize isn't about ego at all. It's about setting standards and expectations so that you can be happy. When you qualify women instead of trying to qualify yourself to them, you become far more attractive.

Desperation is a stinky cologne and people -men and women alike- can sniff it out from a mile away. By being the prize, you invite the women to pursue instead of coming off like a needy and desperate guy who has nothing going for him.

And yes, humility is incredibly important. You can lie to everyone, but NEVER lie to yourself. Admit to yourself all your flaws, your imperfections and your fears. Don't dwell on them, but accept them. You'll find that when you embrace yourself completely, it is very liberating and you will be better equipped to meet your goals.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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