"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

"Just say Hi"

Morteo

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2001
Messages
23
Reaction score
0
Location
Chandler, AZ, USA
I've heard a few people on this board suggesting how one should simply say "Hi!" to strangers to overcome shyness and the fear of rejection. Sort of shock treatment to the mind. The problem is, shy people look at this and think to themselves "I couldn't possibably do that...". I, unfortunatly, was one of these people.

I'd be walking on my campus and decided to myself I'd say "Hi" to at least five people. I'd be walking down the sidewalk and spot a stranger and get ready to say it, but then would quickly decide not to. Then another stranger, and another retreat. I figured I was thinking too much about some silly little exercise and dropped it.

A few days latter I was walking around my house and saw some girl, probably a few years younger than me. I wasn't thinking "Hey, I think I'll try to get her attention", or "I think I'll try that 'Hi' thing." The words did, however, just fall out. "Hello." With a slight nod, even. The girl smiled and said "Hi" back.

In the end, how did I feel? Nothing. No elation that I had taken the first step to overcoming my shyness. But, I didn't have a gripping panic attack and wigout in the middle of the street. All in all, the world changed. I didn't change (well, maybe a little...).

The point is, it's nothing. Just do it, but don't try it. If you try it, your mind will try to rationalize what your doing. Don't think, just do.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

DumpaLumpagus

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 14, 2005
Messages
91
Reaction score
1
I think saying "Hi" just sounds better then saying "Hello". Try saying it out loud! "Hi". "Hello". I never say "Hey", because she might mistake me for a hungry farm animal! I think sounding good while speaking makes me infinitely more attractive. Just like a good song, I will want to hear it more and more.
 

sol2k

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 26, 2003
Messages
35
Reaction score
0
Age
51
Location
.pt in .sg
Here, here !

This is exactly why the first missions in the DJBC involve smiling and saying "Hi" to total strangers. And nothing more.

Once that part of the anxiety is blown wide open, the rest of the approach is more about vibing and being the cool guy you know you really are.

(did i mention bump?)
 

The Nice Guy is Gone

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Aug 26, 2005
Messages
325
Reaction score
2
how about another bump--it is pretty easy guys.
 
Top