"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Just found out that my boyfriend had an affair

Papermoon

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For three months. Three ****ing months.

How. How can you do this? How can you betray someone like this? How does it work? What happens to a guy who does that??
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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MrS

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He got bored of you, has no self control, you flaked on him once too often, you weren't putting out.

Just some thoughts.

What happens TO a guy? Nothing.
 

I'm Charming

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Men are logical.

And 1 + 1 = 2 which is bigger than 1 on its own soooooo....

Yeah, there's not a strong emotional connection. He just see's it as getting double what he wants.

Of course this is totally selfish, greedy and smacks of the "I couldnt care less attitude", but most women will go along with that because its badass and they cant believe they'd be rejected like that.
 

KontrollerX

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That sucks.

Why not just avoid relationships entirely and hook up with guys?

Todays culture does not promote healthy lasting relationships so you just gotta roll with the times or hope you win the lottery by finding a good guy for you.

Personally I like my life to have a high degree of certainty and stability. I detest drama and having to look over my shoulder as the result of female jealousy games so I follow Leykis 101 and you could do the same just in reverse since you are presumably a female.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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PRMoon

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Does anyone know the details of the relationship or anything? This post seems less like a question of aid or reason and more like a rant...I suppose we all need to vent every now and again.
 

Desert Fox

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You need to put out more and become more attractive to your bf. Otherwise, just get used to being cheated on or break up.

Those are your choices, pick one and move on.
 

( . )( . )

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Papermoon said:
How. How can you do this?
I've seen some of your posts and your pretty opinionated with a smart ass tone, often adverse to the whole "DJ" ideology (on paper of course).

If I can see this, I'm sure your boyfriend can .

Maybe he went for the more feminine option? Just an idea.
 

LoneSilver

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How did you find out did your boyfriend spring it on you or did someone share this news with you?

LoneSilver

Papermoon said:
For three months. Three ****ing months.

How. How can you do this? How can you betray someone like this? How does it work? What happens to a guy who does that??
 

Nighthawk

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I'm not defending him or blaming you. If you had a committed relationship and he betrayed that trust, **** him, he's not worth it and move on.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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TheBucketOfTruth

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Desert Fox said:
You need to put out more and become more attractive to your bf. Otherwise, just get used to being cheated on or break up.

Those are your choices, pick one and move on.
That's BS. You could be with a beautiful woman that has sex with you whenever you want, and still want to get more elsewhere. As the saying goes, "Show me the most beautiful woman in the world and I'll show you a guy who's tired of F-ing her." It's just the nature of man; we desire to spread our seed.

As for cheating in general, there are many different reasons that can cause a man to cheat on his significant other. You can ask him if it was just a physical thing or if he has some emotional connection to this other woman (not that he'd tell the truth).
 

Papermoon

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To all the smartasses who say I didn't put out enough. 2 times a night, not counting bjs. There is nothing to complain. If anything he's the one who did put out enough. Same old lame old positions.

I found out using his computer, because mine broke down. He says its just physical, but there are love e-mails all over the place. They also went on mini-vacations together. With the gas I put in the ****ing car.
 

The Bat

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You need to start dating real DJ's then. Some real men.

Not insecure little boys.
 

PRMoon

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...are you going to release the synopsis of your relationship or not. Don't write a book or anything but for f*cks sake, what do you want us to say?! You come to a predominately male website and say nothing short of "My boyfriend cheated! Boo hooo!" and expect what from us? We're guys we talk about cheating all the time but we won't be able to assist in anyway if you don't tell us some of the finer details about your relationship. There may have been signs you missed or things you both did or didn't do that lead to the events in question.


Then again, I could just go back to my original idea that YOU ARE JUST RANTING. And don't really seek an awnser. If that's the case, then sorry but life is tough. Suck it up like everybody else, go out there and find someone else to spend time with.

As so many SoSuave DJ's have said time and time again...

NEXT!
 

azanon

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Papermoon said:
For three months. Three ****ing months.

How. How can you do this? How can you betray someone like this? How does it work? What happens to a guy who does that??
How can one have more than one friend? How can one have more than one relationship? Is this seriously your question?

I have several genuine friendships, and I've certainly had more than one "relationship" at the same time before. The "why" is because everyone's different, and everyone has something you can uniquely learn and experience from them, and with them. The "how" is by separating friendships/relationships from one another.

My definition of "boyfriend/girlfriend" doesn't mandate exclusiveness. Maybe his doesn't either. You aren't married to him, sweetheart.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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