"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Just drank a fifth of capt. morgan

Thatfeel21

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Aight..just drank a fifth of capt morgan (750ml.. 35% alc. by volume consumed within 3.5 hours) and im feelin "aight" but not super drunk...i drink very often tho maybe 4 nights a week (college student).. is my tolerance being that high mean im nearing an alcoholic?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Skel

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At that age I use to drink grain alcohol. God that was stupid of me
 

thehexman

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I would say that you are ok because a) you are still typing without mistakes b) know exactly what you had, although that isn't hard to tell, c) know what percentage it has and how much you drank in ml.

Normal college behavior, I would say.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Michele l'Arcangelo

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thehexman said:
I would say that you are ok because a) you are still typing without mistakes b) know exactly what you had, although that isn't hard to tell, c) know what percentage it has and how much you drank in ml.

Normal college behavior, I would say.
i think you are giving a list of why he WOULD BE an alcoholic...

i don't think you read his question correctly...

or i read it incorrectly.
 

mpimpin

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What do you normally drink? I know I was on a vodka kick for a couple weeks and then finished off a fifth of Captain in a couple hours without feeling anything. I had built up a tolerance with the vodka.

I now drink only about once a month.
 

Obsidian

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umm, drinking a fifth of liquor seems like a hell of a lot to me
 

thehexman

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Michele said:
i think you are giving a list of why he WOULD BE an alcoholic...

i don't think you read his question correctly...

or i read it incorrectly.
Actually, you're right. I read it incorrectly.

On second thoughts, you can't really say if he's an alco or not, because a) we don't know how much he weighs b) if he's been drinking since he was 14 (builds up tolerance) c) if he has had anything to eat d) drank anything (like water) e) mixed it or drank it straight etc etc etc.

A fifth is a lot of spin for one night though. It all depends...
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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mpimpin

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Capt.Jack Sparrow said:
Drink some Sailor Jerry instead :up:
Thats what I've switched too :up:
Got a cup right now
 

Effington

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I've had those nights where I counted way too many drinks than I should have, and didn't feel buzzed. There are a lot of factors, like how much you've ate, how much sleep you've gotten, and even the atmosphere that will contribute. If you're sitting on your butt watching a movie at home, you don't feel it nearly as much as if it's crowded, noisy, and you're moving around a lot.

I'm a pretty little guy and I drank 2 pints of rum in about 2-3 hours once and didn't feel a thing watching a movie. The next night I went out to a club and after about 5 mixed drinks I was stumbling all over.
 

oakraiderz2

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Capt.Jack Sparrow said:
Drink some Sailor Jerry instead :up:
Thats rough stuff...makes my face HOT!
 

Phyzzle

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iqqi said:
So whats the best whiskey?
Elijah Craig Single Barrel

I like my whiskey like I like my women: 18 years old and mixed up with coke.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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iqqi

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Phyzzle said:
Elijah Craig Single Barrel

I like my whiskey like I like my women: 18 years old and mixed up with coke.
But can I order that at any bar? And is it really expensive?

I will try it tonight!! WAIT> I think Elijah Craig is what I had the other night, and I loved it! I know it was a guys name that started with an E...
 

Aboleo

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I just finished my 6th beer (shiner bohemian black lager), and no effect whatsoever. Nothing. I just feel bloated and I think I need to take a p!ss. I am never buying this **** again, I swear. It seems that beer, any beer, never really works on me, anyways... Even if I start to feel something it quickly wears off. What is a man do to, drink 15 beers a night?!

I also have to drink a **** load of whiskey (usually 1/5 bottle of "jack") before I start feelin' the least bit buzzed. It sucks and it quickly wears off unless I suck down half the freakin' bottle.

Personally, I'd rather smoke the reefer. It works better, it's better for you, and it's actually cheeper than buying boose.:yes:

**** it. I'm sparking one up right now:D
 

The Inside Man

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You are not cool, or special. I know a lot of people that can drink that much real rum(100 proof) in half the time.

Take a look at this guy. Thats my college house, I'm in the video for a sec but not the one doing the SICB. A SUPER IRISH CAR BOMB is something to actually brag about. 2 pints of guinness, 3 shots baileys, 3 shots jameson irish whiskey-in 10 seconds. Thats 8 drinks.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9m8yKjRY2ic
 

PRMoon

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The Inside Man said:
You are not cool, or special. I know a lot of people that can drink that much real rum(100 proof) in half the time.

Take a look at this guy. Thats my college house, I'm in the video for a sec but not the one doing the SICB. A SUPER IRISH CAR BOMB is something to actually brag about. 2 pints of guinness, 3 shots baileys, 3 shots jameson irish whiskey-in 10 seconds. Thats 8 drinks.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9m8yKjRY2ic
Okay, I'm a pretty heavy drinker and even I think that that's insane. I have done two sets of 4 horsemen (Jack, Jim, Johnny, Jose) in half hour and 3 liquid cocaines (Goldshlager [SP], Jagger, 151) in the same amount of time...those were pretty long nights...but the thickness of two pints guiness alone would prevent me from drinking that quantity at that speed.
 

BMX

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A little bit of Captain Morgan's mixed into my cup of jungle juice got me spinnin' right away! I'm enjoying my case of PBR too much rite though.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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