I agree wholeheartedly.
I am keenly aware of this more now than ever.
I think it is very important to learn the skill of stepping back abnd getting a better persepctive on yourself , your surroundings, your judgements, and the people you interact with.
We really have got to get a handle on the threat assessments and snap judgements we ar emaking here, guys.
All this micro management , it has got to stop.
Wer are losing persepctive of the bigger picture and getting involved in really petty things.
I know people her have deep rooted insecurities.
This is not a moral failing.
They were not really conscious decisions on our part , ladies and gentlemen.
Things happened. OK, things will happen to us.
But we cant ignore them, we have to deal with them eventually.
But once recognized that your fears and doubts are actually CONTROLLING you, and really coloring your persepctives, in a dread filled and cynical, pessimistic view, you have GOT to get serious about handling your issues.
I know many people come here to get affimations, validation, ego stroking, and trying to assert themselves when deep inside they truly feel inferior and not good enough.
But you are only operating on this feeding mechanism.
Youre not getting into the deeper issue.
And you need to step outside of your emotions , at least for a little whille.
Dont let your emotions consume you.
Stay centerd, learn HOW to stay centered when dealing with togh emotional issues.
If you dont, EVERY little thing will be too heavy for you to handle. EVERY emotional thing will be gauged incorrectly.
You will make the 'mountains out of a molehill' syndrome, and you have to do everything in your power to avoid that.
All that trauma and hurt we have gone through is recorded in our minds an dbodies.
When you continually repeat these patterns, as we can see in the posts here, you only reinforce this neurology and past expereinces.
IN other words, you keep putting on yet another chain or padlock onyour cage.
YOu only lock yourself more securely into your own unhappiness, sadness, disappointment , bitterness,and past hurtful expereinces.
But you are not the sum of those expereinces, in the sense that your past is exactly your Identity.
Why?
Because you have reason.
You have intellect.
You have a life ahead of you to LIVE fully, not use up to mope in and cry your life away.
And youve been given gifts, many of which you dont even recognize, people.
You have CHOICE
You can CHOOSE to be optimistic, hopeful, faithful, and yes, even happy.
Please, ladies and gentlemen here at SS..
..stop always repeating those same old fear based patterns in your life.
Stop giving in to them.
Learn to step back and get the bigger pciture.
ITs not so bad.
Remember, what you are going through, and have been through, many many people are experiencing as well.
You are not alone in this. Believe me. EVERYONE here is dealing with these issues to some degree or another.
NO ONE really has EVERYTHING together.
We all need to be in alignment with that, and not be ashamed of it.
And continue to grow as people, to improve ourselves, our lives, our realtionships and experiences in life...
So think about how signifcant something really REALLY is.
Are you idnetifying with the problem or circumstance that give you anxiety, indecisions, and fear?
or can you step back and get a broader perspective?
Maybe you can say :"Oh, gee..maybe all I have to do this...and maybe it will get better.Maybe its NOT so overwhelming after all. Instead of moping and rehashing my problems again and again, maybe if I looked at what I need to do, and actually DO IT,maybe I can fix this."
ANd stop getting so close to the problem, so that you develope a myopia, and believe that ALL THAT EXISTS is 'YOUR" Problem.
How can that be rational?
Its not.
But this is what happens when we lose that Objectivity, and get too emotionally attached to a problem
I know there is a lot of self doubt. A lot of people here have insecurities, and you can see how some people try to build themselve up just so they can feel good about themselves again for a little while.
But this is not long lasting and healthy action.
So learn to step back, gain perspective, realize that it CAN be dealt with, and that YOU have the resources to do so.
And gain resolve and wisdom in this fact, that if you continue to repeat those same neurological patterns, you will get the same dreaded feeling and the same experiences and results that you dislike so much.
And use that resolve and wisdom to give you courage to not give in to those patterns.
And regain control of your self, your emotions, your thoughts and your life.
