"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Job References/finding help

Goku

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i am not applying at some long term career, just a part time job in retail to support college, so keep this in mind.

couple questions i have regarding job finding:

1) if you give ur prospective employer a reference (a supervisor from a previous job). what questions is the prospective employer going to ask. what if i provide a professor or volenterring reference, what questions will the employer ask about me to them?

2) is it okay to provide a reference from the job i am currently working at and would still like to work at even if i get hired by the prospective company.

3) how should i ask my supervisor for reference. ie, by asking for the store's number, his cell number, home phone? because our store opens pretty late , 7pm and i know most companies check for reference before 4pm and i am scared that the employer might not get in contact with my current supervisor.

looking forward to the replies
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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penkitten

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an interviewer will want you to apply and the application will ask for work history including present employer and past , it will ask for education and job qualities and it will ask for usually 3 references.

when i need to hire someone i look at the application first. is it filled out completely? did they check yes to being involved in crimes or felonies or drugs?
are they employed now? do they job hop? may i contact present and previous employers? if not , why the heck not? what was the reason for leaving their previous jobs?
do they have any job skills that can be used in my company?

if they call the other employers , they are going to ask if you were a hard worker, if you had absenteeism or tardiness, if there were any problems.
i will call them because i have hired enough people that didnt work out , not to check them all out now.

i never call personal references. people only list family or friends that will give them a good one.
now with that being said, i list previous co workers that i worked well with , and places like the electric company because i pay mybills on time if i apply anywhere.
you could list your professor as one, why not? and if you list him, you should just let him know you applied for a new job and listed him in hopes that he could give you a fair reference.

as far as the job you currently have, you need to go to your supervisor and let him know you applied for a second job, it should not interfere with your current job, and you would hope that you could still stay on and work , and that he would give you a fair reference.
 

Goku

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Originally posted by penkitten
an interviewer will want you to apply and the application will ask for work history including present employer and past , it will ask for education and job qualities and it will ask for usually 3 references.

when i need to hire someone i look at the application first. is it filled out completely? did they check yes to being involved in crimes or felonies or drugs?
are they employed now? do they job hop? may i contact present and previous employers? if not , why the heck not? what was the reason for leaving their previous jobs?
do they have any job skills that can be used in my company?

if they call the other employers , they are going to ask if you were a hard worker, if you had absenteeism or tardiness, if there were any problems.
i will call them because i have hired enough people that didnt work out , not to check them all out now.

i never call personal references. people only list family or friends that will give them a good one.
now with that being said, i list previous co workers that i worked well with , and places like the electric company because i pay mybills on time if i apply anywhere.
you could list your professor as one, why not? and if you list him, you should just let him know you applied for a new job and listed him in hopes that he could give you a fair reference.

as far as the job you currently have, you need to go to your supervisor and let him know you applied for a second job, it should not interfere with your current job, and you would hope that you could still stay on and work , and that he would give you a fair reference.
thank for the reply penkitten.
so i am guessing for professor reference, they would ask if i come to class on time, hard working, stuff like that....you list the electric company? that's odd, but i might try that.

are they employed now? do they job hop?
i know that is a serious matter in 'career' positions, but i am just looking for a place that need ppl for the upcoming xmas season in a entry lvl retail position. just as long as i show up when they need me the most or whenever(ie, the weekend) and with them knowing that i have a second job wouldnt be a bad thing right

but one question i need answered, can i tell my future employer to call my references at specific times during the evening cause like i said, i am scared that the employer won't be able to contact my supervisor.
 

penkitten

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Originally posted by Goku
thank for the reply penkitten.
so i am guessing for professor reference, they would ask if i come to class on time, hard working, stuff like that....you list the electric company? that's odd, but i might try that.


i know that is a serious matter in 'career' positions, but i am just looking for a place that need ppl for the upcoming xmas season in a entry lvl retail position. just as long as i show up when they need me the most or whenever(ie, the weekend) and with them knowing that i have a second job wouldnt be a bad thing right

but one question i need answered, can i tell my future employer to call my references at specific times during the evening cause like i said, i am scared that the employer won't be able to contact my supervisor.
no worries, you arent old enough for them to think you are a job hopper yet!
i know its weird to list the electric company however i pay my bill on time so i list them. believe it or not, paying your bills on time is a great reference. alot of the folks who live in my apartment complex list me as a reference because i know them and where they live and they pay their rent on time and stay outta trouble.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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