We all have heard of the phrase “they are the jealous type”. Jealousy is by far the most powerful emotion out there. It originates from our own sense of insecurity. In it's weakest form it may cause a little resentment, piss some people off or trigger impulsive attraction. It is also one of the quickest ways to truncate a relationship. For some, any hint of impropriety triggers an instant transformation. It can spread and blow way out of proportion as time progresses.............. if you allow it.
Lets take a look at some triggers that cause some people to lose their cool.
VIRTUAL-people who met online, then begin dating, sometimes are pre-occupied that you still have your profile up. They assume exclusivity and question it when they see you are still an active member of a dating site. Some see your icon in an instant messenger and wondered why you have not initiated conversation with them.
NEGLECTION-the silent treatment leaves people hanging and the more time that passes the more insecure they become. If you have not emailed back, not responded to their IM’s/Text messages/phone calls/voicemails, etc they often jump to the conclusion that there must be someone else. This sudden loss of interest initiates the low self-esteem.
WHERE WERE YOU-similar to neglecting, unaccountability causes many to flip out. If they were not at work, running late or not at the gym, at the specified time then the imagination takes over.
FRIENDLY-if they looked at, smiled, approached, engaged someone in conversation, dancing, etc it is perceived as flirting.
MALE FRIENDS-having male friends, frequent contact with their ex.
CHANGE-some people get bent out of shape when you deviate from the normal routine. Getting all dressed up, working out, a new tan, leaving early, taking a vacation, need some space or alone time, etc.
EXCUSES-if your responses are hesitant or deemed as not valid this too can create jealousy. Why were you talking to him, how come it too you so long to respond, where were you, why are you not spending the night, etc
The best course of action to follow is to not let anyone’s actions; words or behavior effect our confidence in the slightest. Be neutral, indifferent, act as if you are unaffected and could care less. Failure to do this could cause hardship down the road….insert news tragedy of jealous rage gone bad.
Lets take a look at some triggers that cause some people to lose their cool.
VIRTUAL-people who met online, then begin dating, sometimes are pre-occupied that you still have your profile up. They assume exclusivity and question it when they see you are still an active member of a dating site. Some see your icon in an instant messenger and wondered why you have not initiated conversation with them.
NEGLECTION-the silent treatment leaves people hanging and the more time that passes the more insecure they become. If you have not emailed back, not responded to their IM’s/Text messages/phone calls/voicemails, etc they often jump to the conclusion that there must be someone else. This sudden loss of interest initiates the low self-esteem.
WHERE WERE YOU-similar to neglecting, unaccountability causes many to flip out. If they were not at work, running late or not at the gym, at the specified time then the imagination takes over.
FRIENDLY-if they looked at, smiled, approached, engaged someone in conversation, dancing, etc it is perceived as flirting.
MALE FRIENDS-having male friends, frequent contact with their ex.
CHANGE-some people get bent out of shape when you deviate from the normal routine. Getting all dressed up, working out, a new tan, leaving early, taking a vacation, need some space or alone time, etc.
EXCUSES-if your responses are hesitant or deemed as not valid this too can create jealousy. Why were you talking to him, how come it too you so long to respond, where were you, why are you not spending the night, etc
The best course of action to follow is to not let anyone’s actions; words or behavior effect our confidence in the slightest. Be neutral, indifferent, act as if you are unaffected and could care less. Failure to do this could cause hardship down the road….insert news tragedy of jealous rage gone bad.
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