"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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I've made a decision to put myself out there and I don't know how to start

sangheilios

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Last year was phenomenal for me on a financial level and I have a ton of other things I've been actively working on. However, I also more or less have cut out a ton of fake friends from my life and I have very few people that I really talk to. There are a few whose company I can enjoy but the relationships I have with them are now very superficial and I'm at a point in my life where I feel I'm on a very different page than they are. I'm very busy with my work life, as well as my hobbies but I really feel the desire to meet a woman whose company I can enjoy, both socially and physically/sexually. I feel I have a ton going for me right now and have a lot to offer but I'm just not really sure how to start looking for this. The last time I had any interaction with a female one on one was before the COVID lockdowns, so over a year ago now.

I've already mentioned this tons of times on here, but I've long been a regular gym goer and while I do see attractive women there the opportunities to speak to them are a bit more difficult to work with but I can and have been able to approach in this environment. Next week I signed up for a yoga class that is hosted on a rooftop in the downtown area of my city, it's only $10 and I while I do stretching/yoga on my own I have never actually taken a class. Something else I had looked into in the past was salsa lessons and social events, I checked into this last night but the events have been cancelled because of COVID.

Another thing, that is fairly recent, is I've developed a taste for red wine and every couple weeks I've been going out to enjoy that with a dessert or some sort of treat at a venue in my area that is VERY popular. I can also think of a handful of other places that are like this that have a good vibe. Environments like this can be a little intimidating to me, as everyone there will be going as a group so it can be kind of hard to break into it.

I really can't think of any other ideas that may work for me besides the random cold approach in a public setting like a grocery store.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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SW15

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I really feel the desire to meet a woman whose company I can enjoy, both socially and physically/sexually. I feel I have a ton going for me right now and have a lot to offer but I'm just not really sure how to start looking for this. The last time I had any interaction with a female one on one was before the COVID lockdowns, so over a year ago now.
This is a normal feeling. It should mean the testosterone is good. Everything will be on point if you're eating healthy, not fapping, and not watching porn.

I think a lot of men are frustrated that they don't know where to start when they have a blank slate of zero prospects, pandemic or no pandemic.

I've already mentioned this tons of times on here, but I've long been a regular gym goer and while I do see attractive women there the opportunities to speak to them are a bit more difficult to work with but I can and have been able to approach in this environment. Next week I signed up for a yoga class that is hosted on a rooftop in the downtown area of my city, it's only $10 and I while I do stretching/yoga on my own I have never actually taken a class. Something else I had looked into in the past was salsa lessons and social events, I checked into this last night but the events have been cancelled because of COVID.
Fitness classes are better than the general gym floor for approaching because you eliminate the earbuds issue. In my experience, fitness classes are a less viable option in practice than it would seem in theory. I've been to numerous classes at different places. There are fewer men approaching than one might think there would be. There is also less socialization in general than what might be assumed. Women barely talk with other women at them for finding female-female friendships. I say that because women are the majority of attendees in every style of fitness class that I have attended over nearly a decade of time.

I took salsa dancing lessons at a few junctures in my life and walked away disappointed every time. Your experience may be better than mine. One experience had me in my mid-20s with women in the class around 50. If you can find classes with the typical age of attendee being 20-30 (your target age range), then you're good. I have also had another idea over time that salsa classes are only useful for getting good at that style of dance to do well at salsa night venues. With the pandemic, I doubt there has been much in the way of salsa at night. I don't want to discourage you from taking salsa. I want to encourage you to see if you can plan it better than I did.

Also, you are not likely to meet a hot, young, nubile Hispanic woman at salsa classes. Hispanic women generally do not take salsa classes because they are generally taught it through the culture. However, pre-pandemic, it was possible to meet attractive Hispanic women at night spots with salsa dancing. If Hispanic women are your target, getting really good at salsa dancing is a viable way to meet them. However, you're looking at a long ramp up period before your salsa dancing skill is at the point where pickup through salsa venues is viable. That's what discouraged me.

As a 6'4" fit guy, you should play to your existing strengths. Meet women through fitness endeavors. You should be meeting fit women through something. Based on your geography, I highly recommend hiking. Outdoor approaching is possible and encouraged in a pandemic. Meet women outside, invite for drinks on some patio, then 2nd date sex at home on the third interaction. As a 6'4" guy, emphasize your muscles. Just ask questions. Be a little aloof. Her vag is already aching for your type so you don't need to do much.

Another thing, that is fairly recent, is I've developed a taste for red wine and every couple weeks I've been going out to enjoy that with a dessert or some sort of treat at a venue in my area that is VERY popular. I can also think of a handful of other places that are like this that have a good vibe. Environments like this can be a little intimidating to me, as everyone there will be going as a group so it can be kind of hard to break into it.
Are these sit down places too? Being a solo guy with groups that are seated isn't worth the time.

I really can't think of any other ideas that may work for me besides the random cold approach in a public setting like a grocery store.
In general, non-bar pickup is best for guys who roll solo. I've been a big proponent of non-bar pickup.

Cold approaching is not all that fun. The oddball guy like Tom Torero might like, but most normal men find it annoying at best. To the outside world, I would seem like a confident guy making non-bar approaches on walking paths, at grocery stores, etc. To me, it's something that I have to do in order to get dates and get to enjoy vagina. I much prefer to have extended relationships so that I don't have to do that stuff.
 
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