"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Ive Come to Terms with myself

NSUballer

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In this fast paced world we live in its hard to concentrate on women when we have so many other things on our plates. Im in college and play footbal. Those two alone are very time consuming. Then add work during the summer and its almost impossible to have a serious relationship with someone.

Ive been playin the field for a while and had a few not so serious GFs. I really dont like chasing women around and playin their stupid games just to get some sex or a GF. I hate being alone, meaning I hate not having a girl around to hang out with/sleep with, and do things with. But Ive met so many girls and very few are actually worth putting time and effort. Im only 20 and have alot of growing up to do. I have things I want to accomplish for myself. I love to go out with my friends and mack on the HBs in the club/bar because its fun. But most of these girls are simply retarded. For instance this girl I met a few weeks ago, we ended up hanging out alot last week and even slept at each others house 3 nights in a row(no sex bc I never tried) Then all of a sudden she wont return my calls. Its baffling sometimes.

But Ive realized I cant control other people. All I can do is control myself. Ive never wanted to be a player and sleep with tons of girls. Even though I talk to more than one girl at a time. Im just fed up with having to chase girls. I want that one girl that wont make me chase her too far. The one that wants me for me. The one that understands that im not here to entertain her. I want the one that keeps me from ever wanting to chase anyone else. I know im not the only that feels like this.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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mikeyb

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I know exactly what you mean. I'm in college too and I feel the same way. I refuse to let my life revolve around some girl's mind games. Out of ten girls I meet, I find that I only want to get to know two or three of them better, and out of those, I'm lucky if one is gf material. What's worse, most of the time, that one in particular isn't attracted to me, or whatever relationship we start falls apart after a week or two for no obvious reason.

Bottom line: dating is like craps. Roll enough times and you'll get a hard 6.
 

ObieJuan

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I'm 26 and it's the same story. I'm no player either, it's hard for me to respect most women with the games they play. I work 45-50 hrs. a week, maintain a diet, work out and study- whatever time I have left over I don't really feel like wasting it girls for the reasons you mentioned. Getting laid is nice but I really don't want to risk STDs on random hors...if I meet a girl I like then I'll sleep with her...chances of meeting women like that come along maybe once or twice a year. My standards might be really high, but I think societies' standards are very low.

There's a girl in Norcal I want to meet right now, she's cute, around my age and has qualities I'm interested in. Seemingly honest with herself and others, friendly and has a good heart. I think the naughty/nice factor is there- that's probably what caught my interest. I hate girls that are prudes- been there, done that. I'd never consider being with someone who doesn't want me sexually, who doesn't convey that by talking dirty and show how bad she wants me...without me telling her to do it. I think she likes my personality which is also important. I see where you're coming from, you're not alone. Good women are hard to find for guys like us because we set the bar for ourselves which is above and beyond what most women could measure up to. I guess we should just keep on doing our thing and maybe one day we'll get lucky.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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NSUballer said:
...But Ive realized I cant control other people. All I can do is control myself. Ive never wanted to be a player and sleep with tons of girls. Even though I talk to more than one girl at a time. Im just fed up with having to chase girls. I want that one girl that wont make me chase her too far. The one that wants me for me. The one that understands that im not here to entertain her. I want the one that keeps me from ever wanting to chase anyone else. I know im not the only that feels like this.
Welcome to number one realization about people and the nature of control. Also, congratulations for making the first step in defining yourself by your own terms and not just by what people typically do around you. :up:
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Potbelly

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mikeyb said:
Bottom line: dating is like craps. Roll enough times and you'll get a hard 6.
haha...too bad we can't roll 10s
 

NSUballer

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The girl that slept at my house definitely doesnt think im gay. We made out alot and I fingered her alot too. She said she doesnt have sex though(which is BS bc i couldve got het) And while she was in my bed this other girl called me to do something that afternoon. Maybe that had somthin to do with it.
 

saber

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The other girl calling had nothing to do with it. She wanted you to **** her. Now she will find someone else.
 

NSUballer

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Im not even really worried about that girl because I really didnt like her anyways.
 

L777

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What? You've accepted that you're a meathead tool? Good for you
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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L777

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NSUballer said:
hey buddy why dont you get off my nuts....theyre gettin kinda sweaty
:rolleyes: That comeback had all the hallmarks of a double-figure IQ. Well done.
 
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