I've been destroying my life with a computer for 7 years. I want this to stop.

[David.k]

My name is David and I'm 22.

I have no job, no skills or interests outside of using a PC - I've tried to quit in the past, but I lose all interest for everything in about 24 hours. Everything just seems so mundane - the place I live in, the people around me, books, television.

I've been hitched to a computer since I was 15 - in fact, using a computer to play online videogames is what got me into reading. I have three bulging bookshelves, and I've read 'em all. But when I am deprived of a social computer game for too long, I just feel empty inside. I find everything boring, completely and utterly boring. I wouldn't be able to read or write properly if it weren't for my using a keyboard from a young age - I would never have been interested enough. That's my problem, if something doesn't interest me, I won't even entertain the ideaof using mental energy to explore it.

I'm at my wit's end! I bought a laptop, because I thought that I would not play games and I could close it shut if I was overusing it and take deep breaths..but no. I don't even want to use it! I haven't played a videogame properly in ages, because of this I haven't read anything for about two weeks. What used to entertain me now just bores me. I hate writing with a pen and paper...

I have no friends, but the sort of people that populate this City are not necessarily the type of people I want to be friends with anyway.

I want to find joy in something again. I'd love to go to college before it's too late, but I can't even bring myself to write emails or text messages (therefore I haven't contacted any colleges) because I hate writing anything - I'm just that bored. I don't know what I'm going to do.

I think I'm going to do something stupid...I'm always feeling empty. Videogames are what gave me my intensity of character...I'd always find the fun in everything I did - but now...

Help?

 

[speed dawg]

You've got a long way to go. I know it's cliche and we say this repeatedly, but I still think it's a great starting point: Join a gym and start working out. The reasons for this are two-fold: 1) It gets you in shape and raises confidence, and 2) It gets you out of the house.

Accomplish this task, workout for two weeks, then come back here and update us.

 

[carrot]

before you find joy
release negative feelings ,go see therapist or EFT
find what works for you to get back to normal before you can find +VE

 

[speed dawg]

Working out is a great suggestion, but it isn't always for everyone and not every guy is it into it.

It's not, but that's not the point. This guy doesn't know what he's into. To find that out, you have to get out there and try stuff. Working out is just a logical first step because the benefit is two-fold. That's why I want him to come back in two weeks after he's gotten out of his comfort zone for the first time in his life.

If working out doesn't work, you need to explore different passions. What gets you interested? Get out there and join groups. Having made the computer the center of your life for so long, surely you must know that it can also be a great way of meeting people. For some people, online dating has been a success. For others, various meet up groups can be an excellent way to meet people who are interested in the same things you are. Are you into clubs or bars? Get some friends and become more outgoing. Hit up some local concerts, places with a live band are often pretty easy places to pick up.

Ain't no way this guy is ready for any of that. And I'm guessing the guy has already tried the internet dating game.....he says he wants to get AWAY from the computer.

This sort of thing is a step by step process. And at the end of the day, we're here to help men who've been sucked in by the matrix and this world in general. We're not exactly a 'pick-up' forum at the root. It's real simple to say "Go get some friends...." but much harder for a depressed guy to do it. He has to work up to it.

 

[Julian]

get out of the house an get a job brah

 

[LiveFreeX]

Hello, I am LiveFreeX and for 33 years I have let videogames rule my life. I want this to continue! I have a fairly attractive 24 y/o asian wife and the two of us pound it out like rabbits. I play Xbox and RPGs when not screwing/eating. I also like Magic Cards and Dungeons and Dragons, I probably make more money than most people and do less work. I've lived in about 6 or 7 countries and had loads of adventures.

Don't blame your hobbies for your sh1tty life.

Here's something you might understand. Go to this page: http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=d20modern/article/20030519a

Download a character sheet, print it out and create a cool character. Then proceed to go out and take lessons or follow the life path with the goal of becoming that character.. By the time you are finished, you'll be awesome. I did it a long time ago, learned martial arts and all sorts of cool things. You can pick up the D20 modern player's guide for all sorts of interesting skills and ideas for you to pursue.

My wife and I both love to game, so don't blame your hobbies for your lack of social life. Go out and network with more players. Go to the XBOX live network, have fun with a couple people and figure out a way to meet up even if they are half way across the world. Most guys are too lazy or chicken sh1t to do anything adventurous with their lives. You like adventure because you like games, go find a way to bring your gaming life into reality. If you want some money, go out to the oil patch in Texas or an offshore oil rig and work as a welder or something for 6 months. Then take that money and go study martial arts in another country for the other 6. Spetz in Russia, Taekwando in Korea, Kung Fu in China... at least you'll have some real life experience and time to reflect on your life at home afterwards. If that doesn't appeal to you, go sign up to the peace corps.

 

[JoeMarron]

Hello, I am LiveFreeX and for 33 years I have let videogames rule my life. I want this to continue! I have a fairly attractive 24 y/o asian wife and the two of us pound it out like rabbits. I play Xbox and RPGs when not screwing/eating. I also like Magic Cards and Dungeons and Dragons, I probably make more money than most people and do less work. I've lived in about 6 or 7 countries and had loads of adventures.

Hah this guy is doing it right. Superb advice. Listen OP

 

[dasein]

OP is obviously addicted, any drug of choice could be exchanged for computers in the OP. So advice to incorporate the drug of choice into growing a life is bad advice and won't work. Exercising is good advice, but mostly, get out of the house and create immediate demands that require you to be out of the house for the entire day. Anywhere you sit where there is a computer such as a library or even college is also considered "the house" so don't weasel that way. In OP's shoes, I'd try to get a trade job in some sort of apprentice capacity. Stay like this, functioning out of the house, for a couple years. Afraid that's about it in terms of options OP, you are an addict and will either decide to begin recovery or not. Recovery means complete abstinence from the drug of choice btw. Good luck.

 

[Bible_Belt]

For an addiction to go very far, there is usually an enabler present. Are mommy and daddy paying for this life of leisure? Get away from the enabler and the addiction will run out of fuel.

 

[TheStig]

For an addiction to go very far, there is usually an enabler present. Are mommy and daddy paying for this life of leisure? Get away from the enabler and the addiction will run out of fuel.

It's gotta be something like this. Unless one has a large sum of money that they are living off of, or someone else is paying the bills, it's impossible to live life the way the OP is.

 

[backseatjuan]

Computer is awesome, stop jerking off tho.

You should be able to repair computers, and if you buy SMD rework station, also repair cell phones. Do that. As long as you make $100 per day, you're fine.

If you are fat, buy bench, bum bells, and Fitness Made Simple. Run every morning for as long as you can. And in about 2 months you should get in shape.

The critical thing is finding you a buddy, a dude that you could look up to. Try looking for DJs to do practice with in your area.

Last thing, you should never wait for one to do another, for example, don't wait too loose weight to approach women.

The very last last thing is that you have improper view of your surrounding world, keep that in mind, and as you get real and continue to get real, it will become easier to navigate this world successfully. How to use this information? If you don't want to do something, or if you think you'll fail, take a deep breath and do it. If you don't understand something, ask.

What you look like, post a pic.

 

[Desdinova]

Here's a place that could help you quite a bit:

http://www.olganon.org/

It helps those with an addiction to online gaming.

 

[backseatjuan]

Addiction to online games
That sounds like this fluffy video clip http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MVYug8cHLIM

I'm literally laughing my ass off. :crackup:

You know what this is called? It is called eat the pie and keep it too. There is no addiction to video games, that is stupid. There are people with little self will and motivation.

 

[LiveFreeX]

I have a friend that is addicted to video games, her name is wife. She is also an ANIME addict and I have to discipline her 2 or 3 times a week with my d1ck. Today I just let her play cat war on her smartphone while going to town on her other end. If you have an 'addiction' find a girl that shares that 'addiction' and the two of you can be happily 'addicted' together. My wife is sitting here watching Japanime in a maid costume.

There is no addiction to video games, that is stupid. There are people with little self will and motivation.

Agreed.

You want to find hot nerd girls who will accept you for 'who you are' ? Go hang out at an ANIME CON. Christ there are so many nerdy fvckables there. The thing is you are coming on a forum of boring ass guys who think benching 180, and making kissy faces in a gym mirror at themselves is fun. Of course they are going to tell you to ditch gaming, their idea of a good night is drinking horse piss and grooving to the oldies with Richard Simmons.