i've become the annoying pestering guy in her eyes, can u change this?

[drift king]

this foreign girl i was trying to get with earlier in the year kept cancelling on me and giving me half a$$ed counter offers of 'maybe next week' i got annoyed with her and told her she was blowing her chances with me.. she didnt respond. next time i saw her a week later she told me i thought too much of myself, i told her i didn't and that she was being spoilt and rude for not offering another time, i won her back, impressed her housemate and appeared golden.

then i set up the date with her, but she cancelled on the day cos it was heavy thunderstorm raining, i was unlucky cos i chose that particular day. then i told her she owed me a time the following week, she didnt offer it on the day i told her to, so i told her off again. bad move. i should have told her score the first time she flaked, so i been overpursuing.

anyway since then we've been beefing each other till 1 day i saw her and decided to talk and patch things up, i knew i couldn't date her she was too spoilt but keeping her around as social proof would be good as well as her crew while i been gaming other girls.

 

[drift king]

fast forward to now, the other day i saw her and her housemate they seemed a bit impolite like they didnt really want me there but really they were just leaving at the time at the cafe i saw them.

again today i return to the same place and they're there chilling, her housemate doesn't look too impressed with me anymore, and the HB i was tryna get with earlier in the year was startled when i came from behind to say hi. then i kissed her, and she still was startled.

for some reason i stood behind her sofa chair and chatted to her for a long time not taking the hint maybe they wanted to study/leave them alone, i literally froze thinking maybe i shoulda left sooner, but i already reached a point where i think they were making fun of me in their own language cos i kept hearing laughing between the girls and when u hear that u assume it's about u as u dont speak their language.

should i have left as soon as i heard the laughter?

 

[drift king]

i was such an afc, i stayed for a good 1 hour after or so, to the point where 1 of the girls said to me 'would u like to sit down? u been standing there for an hour and half' sn1ggering holding back a laugh at the same time.

i feel as if im overpursuing her to the point her friends make fun of me in front of her cos i didn't leave sooner. in these situations should u leave as soon as u hear any laughter?

i didn't have a game plan they just surprised me out of the blue and i didn't want to just say hi as i felt i needed to build rapport to get into their good books again, my goal was stupid, social proof, having hot girls as friends to make me look good, rather than tryna get the girl as i usually do.

should i just ignore her next time? be polite say hi, but dont go talk to them cos they'll be expecting me to do that, and i dont want to be a pest which i already seem to be in their eyes, i think it's my general frame isn't right, like i should be busier or something, i just froze thinking i could make it better by talking longer rather than excusing myself.

have i reached the ultimate low in afc-ism by doing what i did?

the only way to not be considered a pest is i guess to not talk to her anymore when i have the opportunity, eventually she'll notice this.

 

[GlennCoCo]

Next her. Your a man of choices, not scarcity.

 

[changeherways]

man, you can say you just want these women to assist you in sarging (social proof) but you're coming off in your post like you want to 'win' this girls attention back.

they dont respect you, they laugh at you (i would too if you were standing there like a deer in headlights for a hour and a half!) and do you just pop up over their house? that's not normal if you do.

they most likely aren't annoyed by you - they're weirder out by you. they probably think you're crazy and i would too.... move on, and let these girls be.

 

[drift king]

man, you can say you just want these women to assist you in sarging (social proof) but you're coming off in your post like you want to 'win' this girls attention back.

they dont respect you, they laugh at you (i would too if you were standing there like a deer in headlights for a hour and a half!) and do you just pop up over their house? that's not normal if you do.

they most likely aren't annoyed by you - they're weirder out by you. they probably think you're crazy and i would too.... move on, and let these girls be.

where did you get popped up over at their house from??

i said they were in a cafe. there was nothing weird about what i did, however i may have come across as pestering her and not taking the hint.

 

[schttrj]

don't cry over spilt milk. move on.

 

[46and2aheadofme]

I think for normal people, talking to someone you are bumping into or seeing by chance for an hour and a half is extremely off-setting. Maybe there is an exception if you hadn't seen that person for years and are catching up on old times. But even so....

No one with any game should ever have to worry about whether to leave or not when a set is LAUGHING at them.

You should never get to that point in the first place.

Doing what you did shows that you don't have anything better to do, and that winning over the attention of these girls is at the top of the list in your daily planner.

If you are aqcuainted with a chick, they should approach you or at least acknowledge you first.

Otherwise you haven't built enough rapport or they just don't like you.

Btw why do you still want to hang out with them after they have disrespected you in such a way?

Move on, and maybe they will start to wonder why you aren't always running up to them like a happy puppy looking for attention.

As long as you don't do this from a bitter frame, this is the best chance to ever win back any semblance of respect from them.

Most likely you have effed beyond all repair, but that is just a hunch.

 

[bukowski_merit]

i disagree with this statement:

there was nothing weird about what i did,

again today i return to the same place and they're there chilling, her housemate doesn't look too impressed with me anymore

weird. they didnt act impressed because there's nothing impressive about not getting the hint.

"the HB i was tryna get with earlier in the year was startled when i came from behind to say hi. then i kissed her, and she still was startled."

weird. why are you kissing startled women who dont want your company?

for some reason i stood behind her sofa chair and chatted to her for a long time not taking the hint maybe they wanted to study/leave them alone

weird. take the hint next time.

should i have left as soon as i heard the laughter?

you shouldnt have went over to them in the first place. leaving without saying a word would have went a lot further.

i stayed for a good 1 hour after or so, to the point where 1 of the girls said to me 'would u like to sit down? u been standing there for an hour and half'

this is weird and awkward!

should i just ignore her next time? be polite say hi, but dont go talk to them cos they'll be expecting me to do that,

yes! say hi if you must but leave it at that. you seem to understand that - so just do it.

the only way to not be considered a pest is i guess to not talk to her anymore when i have the opportunity, eventually she'll notice this.

yes, be busy... forget these girls exist, learn and move on to the next batch.

 

[drift king]

i disagree with this statement:





weird. they didnt act impressed because there's nothing impressive about not getting the hint.




weird. why are you kissing startled women who dont want your company?



weird. take the hint next time.



you shouldnt have went over to them in the first place. leaving without saying a word would have went a lot further.



this is weird and awkward!



yes! say hi if you must but leave it at that. you seem to understand that - so just do it.



yes, be busy... forget these girls exist, learn and move on to the next batch.

but i've sat with them before and chilled and talked to them in the same way same place allbeit before me and her had issues and beef.

its just different now cos they're wary of me. how is it weird if i've chilled and talked to them before like this?

it's just different scenario different circumstances.

 

[Kevin Feng]

Once you've reached this kind of position with a girl, it's pretty hard to go back. I mean, it's not impossible, but what I'm trying to say is that your time is much better off spent gaming other girls than focusing on this one girl.

If you genuinely are attached to this girl and really want to start something with her, I would advise taking her out with you. You said she could be "social proof", so I'm going to assume that she'll at least go out with you on a friend basis. If she sees you with a lot of different women, that'll make her more attracted to you.

Anyways, losing girls is all part of the process, it's all about loss mitigation.

Learn to approach more confidently to begin with. That's the important thing.

http://theasianplayboy.blogspot.com/2006/05/impact-approach-30-seconds-to-make-it.html