"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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It's NOT OVER for TurtleCels

MatureDJ

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Of all the potential consequences of climate change—rising sea levels, desertification, floods—here’s one that may not be on your radar: climate change is producing an abundance of female turtles. As Helen Davidson at The Guardian reports, according to a new study, warmer sands in a certain section of beach along The Great Barrier Reef have caused more than 99 percent of green sea turtles to hatch as female.
This is a Hefneresque sex ratio. :cool:
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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SW15

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Male turtles have much better ratios. It's a taco party for the turtles of northern Australia.

Turtles have a better mating environment in Australia than male human beings.
 
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