It's all about the message

Al Moh.

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PUA or Dj, Jerk or AFC, Nice Guy or Bad Boy, in the end it all comes down to one choice:

Do you want to be an actor or a natural?

Here's the good news: In this case, the right thing to do is also the better thing to do!

I admire Nice Guys. Seriously, they are the best actors in the world! They ALWAYS somehow manage to convince the girls that they just want to be friends with them!

It's too bad that they actually don't even want that. Society just tells them to act like a friend.

I also admire PUAs. You know, sometimes I just sit in a bar, sip on my drink and watch other guys pick up women. The only difference between a Nice Guy and a PUA is the script. Whereas the Nice Guy tries to give of the impression that he is just a good friend, the PUA acts like a good catch.

"See, I look good, I must be a great catch!"

I can almost see them standing in front of their mirror.

Them: "Damn, I'm good looking!" Their mind: "Or am I?"

Hah, they even try to convince themselves, which could be a good excercise.




Alright, alright, I know what your thinking: "Al, cut this sarcastic crap!"

See, every other day I come here, I stumble upon another "looks or not looks" thread which gets kind of annoying and even pointless but some people seem to get some kind of kick out of participating in those discussions. In my humble oppinion, there is only one thing you need to know:

It's all about the message

Do you look like you take care of my body?

If you have an inch of self-respect, you SHOULD take care of your body. Take a shower every day, get a nice haircut, some decent clothes etc, you get the point.

Now look at this dressed up "pimp". The question we should be asking is: Actor or not? Does he dress like that because he wants to look like a pimp and impress chicks? Or is this his style?

Seriously, you guys are analizing too much. Imagine I am with three other guys at a bar and there is a beautiful woman.

"Approach, approach, approach!", yells the PUA.

Wouldn't that be the right choice?

Let's see:

Option 1:

The other guys are social retards and just starr at her and do nothing.

Alright, I approach and naturally I get the girl (and because this is my post ;) )


Option 2:

The other guys are crazy pimps and all approach the chick at once. Poor girl. I sit back and relax, giving here some EC (like: "I know what your thinking, pretty anoying those guys fighting over you, aren't they?")
Now I'm suddenly mysterious and DIFFERENT.

You should always be DIFFERENT.

"HAHA, so it IS all about the LOOKS, because I can just dress different!!!!!"

Nope. There are so many actors out there. Some people say that women sense it when you put on an act. Yes it's true. Except for the Nice Guys ;)


You know, everyone is different. Everyone is special. At least deep inside. Yes, you are special too. The problem with people is that they do not embrace their uniqueness (their strengths and weaknesses and work on them) but rather they try to fit in, they try to be like someone else.

Here is another one: Remember, perfect is boring. So let's take two perfect Don Juans. Now give one of them crappy clothes. Hah, he just became more human and guess what, more attractive!

Most of you guys take all this stuff waaaaayyyy too seriously. Have a little bit of trust in yourself. Read, read and read some more and then get out there and experiment. You don't need to tell yourself all the time: Do this, don't do that because of rule number XYZ.

It's already in the back of your mind. And if it's not and you messed up you just got some first hand experience! Something to create your own rules which translate into your own style at some point.

Use your imagination, mess up and succeed, stumble and fall, make people laugh and cry, make yourself laugh and cry, damn, this is life, this is supposed to be an emotional rollercaster. Don't worry about being cool all the time, coolness comes with experience, with proof that you can handle everything. You are young and you are free to mess up.

Oh, if only there was a way to devide thoughts and actions, we would all be Master Don Juans by now!
 

panormous

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Al Moh. said:
Use your imagination, mess up and succeed, stumble and fall, make people laugh and cry, make yourself laugh and cry, damn, this is life, this is supposed to be an emotional rollercaster. Don't worry about being cool all the time, coolness comes with experience, with proof that you can handle everything. You are young and you are free to mess up.
I like that, man.
 
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