"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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It could have happened but didn't!

FemPulley

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Well today I had some training for this job and there was this girl who I spent the time of it with. It was only like a 4 hour course but towards the end of it I could feel the chemistry between us.

It was a go go - no doubt. I played it right.

At the end of the lesson we were all going home. To be honest I wanted to spend more time with her, but she was walking towards the gate. My gut instinct said she was on her way out. I was going to go the opposite way.
Then she turned around and we looked at each other, just standing there for a few seconds. Tipping point.
The slight awkwardness of the situation got to me. I said "see yah" - knowing it was actually a "farewell".

I lost her and may not see her again. We exchanged no details or anything like that.

Can anyone tell me what I can learn from this and how I can improve myself?

Thank you gentlemen
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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cordoncordon

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Next time grab your balls and ask her to go grab a drink, or at least for her number.

The worst she can say is "no". Eeee Gawds the horror!!! A girl I hardly know said no to me!

Cmon man, man up.
 
P

perseverance

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cordoncordon said:
Next time grab your balls and ask her to go grab a drink, or at least for her number.

The worst she can say is "no". Eeee Gawds the horror!!! A girl I hardly know said no to me!

Cmon man, man up.
Bingo.

You should never put any pressure on yourself in these situations either. Think of it as two people socialising together. A human being that feels pressure is not enjoyable to be around and a human being free of pressure is a free spirit and that equates to being fun to be around. Be a fun person, don't take yourself or these situations too seriously and you'll be well on your way.
 

Gangster Of Love

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He who hesitates, masturbates!
 

blind_one

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Take the chance, always, you can only gain from it, never lose.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Poonani Maker

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missed opportunities, I was just thinking about that this noon, about the time a hippy-free-love type chick who I've been in contact (mostly strictly business, although she did take a toke in the back room in front of me once, far from business) with the past 2 to 3 years, reached out and put her hand on my back as I was leaving (it was a soft uncontrollable loving touch, I also noticed that several of the people who used to work in her business were gone! maybe...her biz not doing so well and she sees me as a money supply?? fvck I don't know). Right after I'd left her having laid her left hand (uncontrollably - Rare for women to do that, and usually Older women only reach out and touch me, for all intents and purposes, a stranger), I was kicking myself for NOT wittingly snapping back to her as her touched me on the way out, "Kiss me??" while I lounge my head back at her. I Really think that if I'd said that on cue leaving my lips for her to kiss, she would have pulled me back inside (no one's in there but us) and not only kissed me but maybe more, just lock the door, maybe not lock the door who knows. But she's my type. I've fvcked one just like her but brunette all last Summer, so I think that that's why she's drawn to me, I've fvcked her (just another one very much like her, the free-drug using spirit type Very liberal chick); therefore, it's like we've already fvcked cause I've fvcked one just like her - hard to explain; therefore the kinetic energy between us was already there, already primed and powerful for us to act on.

But I didn't say nothing too provocative and went on my way. She probably saw that as weakness, and next time will think less.

But I wonder what her motives are for getting touchy feely - I haven't seen her in like a year full stop. I'm thinking that her business if falling, but she could just simply be wanting me, don't know. She's mid-twenties I'd assume. Nice t!ts but b's I'd say and starting to droop but still I scanned them over good, and she's got the pot-smoker chink eyes though blonde blue-eyed, also the smoker's voice. I believe I could have fvcked her today mid-day in her own place of business. Will see later on what happens...

Also this week I've had 2 marriage proposals, one today, and one a couple of days ago from a McDonald's manager kinda fat average girl. She asked me if I had a ring for her, then motioning with her eyes. I should have complained but she was the manager (who do I complain to??) - you KNOW that if it were flipped and I asked a customer to marry me where's my ring? I could easily get fired, being a male. She is Way outta my league, something in the air making these women so bold, don't get it. I was in a town I hadn't been in in a while, a place where people are not all stuck up like where I'm from (kind of sick of the elitist attitude where I live), but still bizarre in a span of 3 days two marriage overt hints.

The other, today, said that she'd just received her wedding dress today, but the wedding just got called off! and woe is me, as if...I should take his place...Huh? I mean, she was decent, just average nice smooth looking legs, brunette probably mid-30s or later, but com'on, and definitely not even middle class, yes apartment with cats type guys, clock ticking. I'd bang her but who does she think she is?? Crazy week this week, must be the change in where I work. People just different in poorer areas.
 

BigSmooth

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cordoncordon said:
Next time grab your balls and ask her to go grab a drink, or at least for her number.

The worst she can say is "no". Eeee Gawds the horror!!! A girl I hardly know said no to me!

Cmon man, man up.
Agreed.


Always...always...

Always...always...



Trust your gut.

EVERYTHING IN YOUR BODY is telling you to go and ask that girl out for a drink. Yet you hesitate, and start getting anxious, and by that time your odds of actually approaching are about 2%. Funny how the mind works.


Hesitation is the downfall of many possible casual going-outs, relationships, and even marriage. Who knows what might have happened if you asked that girl out. Probably a fun night, maybe sex, possibly more.

Who knows. The only thing you DO know is that you are now going home alone and spending the rest of your night alone.

Is that fun? Which would you prefer? Of course the first scenario. So next time this happens, trust your gut, do not hesitate (and if you do, tell your mind to go kiss your a$s), and just approach.

Worst she can say is no. She's not going to pull a gun out and shoot you or pull out her phone and post a facebook status with your full name humiliating you virally.


But don't dwell on it too much. You live and learn.
 

FemPulley

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I was more than certain she would have said yes. The signs were there. The first sign - she gazed at me and smiled. After the lesson it was intimate space.

But when we got out, she was on her way out, and I had to sort something with reception. I said "see yah" because my gut said so. That's what you do in an ordinary situation. But it wasn't.

I should have shouted "WAIT", and carried on with her.
 

FemPulley

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After a couple of days of contemplation I realised what I did wrong.
I realised I had balls but was lacking. The reason why I could feel chemistry was because she was making signs she was on. The first sign was she gazed and smiled, the second was how close she was getting to me.

But, I did not do my part. I didn't have the courage to make a move and say outside "Hey! Show me where I can get some dinner!". Or I could have even got my hand out so she could hold it to seal the deal.

Now I know what I did wrong I feel a lot better and no longer feel bad about the missed opportunity. I feel stronger and readier for a next time.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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