It all changed at the drop of a dime [ProgressJournal]

[goldStandard]

On new years eve 2010, I met a great girl. My first impression of her was that she was sophisticated, mature, and classy. Boy, I was right. I went up to her, and we hit it off right that second. It turns out she's in her late 20's, virgin, and finishing up med school and to top it off -- she was absolutely beautiful.

20+ dates and 90+ days later, we decided to settle down and step into a relationship. I was her "first" and at that point in time I was very convinced that she was the one.

Well, it's summer 2011. Just recently my business went under for specific reasons and all throughout July I've been spending most of this dramatic and emotional downturn trying to pick myself up. Despite the emotional part, I have not self destructed, drank, or have done any type of binging. The only emotional thing I've done was TRY to seek comfort through my girlfriend.

I am writing this today, because throughout this month I have not been the same confident person I usual am. I've also been noticing my girl has been trying to avoid me. At this very moment I have no problem picking myself up and start fresh with my career, however, it is the girl I am concerned with. She usually gives me "good morning" texts or tell me how "sexually frustrated" she is when she hasn't seen me for a day; but now, after a few days, nothing. Not even a "hello, how is your day?"

If I was just dating this girl I would completely dismiss the fact that she I have not seen her for quite some time.

I will be using Pooks - Dodge the Bullet to get me through this week in attempts to protect my heart as a "just in case" scenario.

6 1/2 months ago she fell for a confident man, and at the moment I am at my most vulnerable. If she can't comfort me, she doesn't deserve me...

"goldStandard" 7/15/2011 4:00pm

 

[Borknagar]

I'd start talking and meeting more women. If she finds out and gets hurt, that's her problem. You're going through some **** right now, she should be understanding. I don't give a fu*ck about how people say women aren't logical, and only go by emotions. Seriously, if you're going through **** your women should understand that.

 

[Domo_Arigatoo]

^ I agree.
In my opinion one of the fundamental reasons for a relationship is for you to be able to comfort your partner when they are in turmoil or when they're feeling down. If she only thinks that it's a one way situation, for you to always be strong and for you to help her when she's feeling down, then she obviously has some misconceptions about relationships. I suggest you talk to her about this and if she's not willing to adapt, you should leave.

 

[Yo'Mama]

What a *****. Sorry to hear that mate. Good luck with everything.

Late twenties, finishing med school and a virgin...... that's unusual to say the least.

 

[sinnerman]

sry to hear about your situation mate. if she naturally isn't taking care of you and all then don't force it. only if it comes from within then its of any importance. when i was in this situation i had another girl who took care of my emotional needs and was there with me whenever i needed her.

 

[JirQUEST]

Truth is, you're in a situation where if she breaks up with you, she won't be on the losing end.

I read the article you linked, and while it is good advice, I don't see how it works to your advantage in relation to your situation.

If I were you, I'd romance her. Get her out on a date, be as romantic as you can be, give her the night of her life, and then break up with her. Ignore her calls, avoid contacting her at all costs, and then let her wonder what the hell happened.

In the meantime, sort yourself out.