"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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is this salvageable

KneghtRyder

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this super hot chick is a waiter at this club.
I've been going there on and off for a month and chatting her up.
About a month ago I got her number, but never called.

last week, I talked to her at the club and basically told her i want to go out with her.

so I call her on saturday, and we're chatting for a few minutes, and as I am about to ask her out, she hung up the phone. I thought it was we got disconnected.

Anyway , two days later I met at the club and I pull her aside because I am sick of these games shes playing and I basically want her to tell me off so I can leave her alone

"I called you saturday ,.. so you dont want to go out with me ? "
She is silent , Not saying yes or no
(SAID SOMETHING I SHOULDN"T HAVE AS IT REVEALED DEPERATION)
I said " alright so I am going to leave you alone? I dont want to waist your time or mine"
Her face then drops
(THEN DRUNK ASS ME GOES ON A DIATRIBE)
"listen, i m not the best looking , or the most fun (she said i was 'nice' )
but i can definetly ....blah blah.. listen i am looking to settle down and
i think you are perfect...your looks ..but i m going to leave you alone..alright?"
I think at this point i ve made a fool out of myself so she starts walking away

I think i misread the whole thing, I was just really tired and just wanted to end the whole thing, but the thing is my persistence was working because last time I had talked to her and told her I wanted to ask her out, and she is being more and more open to me, if I had just laid back and taken things slowly ( as she likes to ) instead of being persistence and overly aggressively I would have gotten farther instead of being cut and dry and DIRECT in getting an answer from her.

NOW is this finished for good... or have I come across as a creep or..

is this salvageable ?
 
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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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skirtChaser

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I would never go back to that club if I acted like that. why does everybody here want to settle down with somebody? go settle down with a stress free single life. and if you're not happy with that go make some more money.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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marinetti

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telling a girl right off the bat - drunkenly - that you want to settle down with her is not going to get you anywhere. it will scare her off.

so no, this is not salvagable. she thinks you're really weird.
 

KneghtRyder

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marinetti said:
telling a girl right off the bat - drunkenly - that you want to settle down with her is not going to get you anywhere. it will scare her off.

so no, this is not salvagable. she thinks you're really weird.


your 100 % right. now how can I fix this and make her think I m not weird

I was thinking of coming back in a few months so she'll forget
 

marinetti

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i think you have this girl on a pedestal, thinking she's so much better and greater than all other girls. you have to get her off of it. i'm not sure why you're so intent on dating her - i mean, i'm sure she's awesome, but you just didn't explain her at all in your post - but you seem to be idolizing her, which is creeping her out.

community advice is accurate in this case - go f*** 10 other women, and then see how special this girl really is. or date 10 other women. or something.

if you wait several months and come back with the same mentality you have now, you're going to get the same results.
 
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