Is this disaster waiting to happen?

[Hyper2010]

Hi Guys

Ill keep this brief but any advice as cold, honest and direct would be much appreciated....

Been seeing a girl now for about 5 weeks, and things have been going well. Regularly speaking via whattsap, phone etc, 90% of what she initiates. Employed C + F and generally gave her digs whenever possible to keep her on her toes...Seems to be going well

Yet recently, I have felt the 'gut' instinct that Doc Love speaks of, a sudden drop in her interest level. Seems to have occured on sunday when I questioned something that she does every year. She says she goes out with a male friend for a meal once a year, and they 'are like brother and sister'. I questioned it neautrally, but implied also that I would not put up or contend with it.

Literally from the moment I sent that message , she now only puts 1 kiss (x) at the end of each message, whereas consistently for the past 5 weeks she has put 2. Most of her relpies this week have been one word/very brief messages and Im wondering whats gone on...

Any ideas? What would anyone else do in this situ?

P

 

[TheCWord]

I think the fact that you are counting the number of X's she sends you is the real problem here.

As PlayHerMan will likely post right below me, the second you start to care more than the girl - it's ova.

 

[betheman]

A question you or anyone else in this scenario should be asking is this...how would she feel if you were doing the same with another female? also, why does she ned to meet this other guy? if she was that into you, she wouldnt be doing it. personally Id be going ghost on this one, you clearly havent fvcked her yet, maybe thats part of the problem?

oh and apologies for jumping into PHM's slot ;-)

 

[Harry Wilmington]

I don't think she should have even mentioned it to you in the first place. At the same time, I don't think you should have reacted so strongly to it. You've only been going out with her for 5 weeks - you don't own her yet, she shouldn't be the girlfriend, and therefore she can technically do whatever she wants.

Also, you made the mistake about talking about something like this via text messaging?? This is why I say "TEXTING KILLS RELATIONSHIPS." This isn't one of those convos that go well over texting - if she sent you a message about this you CALL HER UP and talk about it so you can hear her voice inflections and allow her to explain the scenario. It could be a guy that just comes into town once a year and they meet up to catch up - hey, I have a friend who's a girl that I've known since I was 5, and whenever I'm back on the east coast we meet up and do the same thing. And she really IS like my sister, and she TELLS her husband we're meeting up and he has no problem with it. Why? Because if a man is confident enough in himself, he doesn't fear her falling for this other guy 'cause he knows he can find someone else if she acts up.

And what are you doing giving ultimatums in the first place?? You're a fan of Doc Love, so you know he mentions this in his articles - you telling her you won't contend with this behavior is not going to help your cause. She didn't say she's spending the night with him; she didn't say they were going on a weekend trip - it's just dinner. Now, if after the dinner she started acting all weird or losing interest that would be one thing, but up to this point she's given you NO reason not to trust her.

Loosen up, guy!

 

[5string]

Overthinking this OP.

Replace her. Plenty more fish in the pond.

Sounds like an attention wh0re. Just move on and don't look back.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Jealousy isn't attractive. If you had just laughed it off, her interest would not have dropped like it did. This may not be the first time that her "friend" has caused problems with the guy she is dating. I put that word in quotes, because obviously the guy wants to fvck her. But it should be equally obvious that he is clueless as to how to go about it, and no threat to you at all.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Jealousy isn't attractive. If you had just laughed it off, her interest would not have dropped like it did. This may not be the first time that her "friend" has caused problems with the guy she is dating. I put that word in quotes, because obviously the guy wants to fvck her. But it should be equally obvious that he is clueless as to how to go about it, and no threat to you at all.

"He" in this instance means an ex that she is still crushing on. I can guarantee this with 99% certainty.