Is this bullsh1t text wanting me to keep chasing?

[pete_101]

referring to this HB i picked up on Sat who conveyed high IL i.e. when i said 'i'll be in touch' she goes 'please do' with a big smile and who i suspect has a bf judging by her facebook stuff (see this thread for what i mean:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=189910

i try to set up a date with her for tonight or tomorrow, i go 'hey HB, let's get together for a drink. im busy thurs and fri but could meet tonight or possibly tomorrow at 8pm, how's then?'

i sent this at 1pm, it's now midnight she replies with:

hey pete, Lol..that sounds cool.. Sorry for texting late, but it was a busy day and going to be busy till next week.. Shall we meet mid/late next week? x

wtf.. she said she doesn't work anymore (she used to be an investment banker or something but got married was a stay at home wife, now she's divorced i dont know if she's living off the divorce money or from her family who are rich) when i asked her what she gets up these days she goes 'ive been a recluse for the past year ' she basically gives me indicators of availability and tells me she rarely goes out now.. YET this msg above indicates she's busy busy etc etc.. am i being taken for a ride?

in fairness she could be going abroad for a week but I have to take into consideration that i found on facebook from her photos she MAY still be in a relationship of 2 years (comments about it were in july 2011 and her recent activity has the guy added recently and 2 people liking this)

Should i be suspicious? and what should i respond with? i feel beta male response coming.. next week is ages away.

 

[st_99]

Well, just ask yourself what a DJ that had plenty of options but still wants to get with this girl and was not the least bit outcome dependent do?

Even if thats not even remotely true, just pretend. Thats what I do.

 

[pete_101]

Well, just ask yourself what a DJ that had plenty of options and was not the least bit outcome dependent do?

Even if thats not even remotely true, just pretend. Thats what I do.

you're right.. but i dont know what i would say in that position.. i've never been in that position before with that many options..

would 'ok' be sufficient?

i feel like i should say something which indicates i'm a prize and she should offer me an exact time.. if i go 'ok' and then leave it and not contact her that'll stem her interest a bit cos she expects me to follow up with a time next week?

it doesn't sound like someone who HAD high IL, i think she's playing me.

 

[st_99]

HB: Shall we meet mid/late next week? x

pete_101: mid to late

 

[Iceberg]

Pete, you ask way too many goddamn questions. In fact, you ask so many damn questions, you had to sign up for a 2nd account just to allow yourself to ask new questions.

 

[Iceberg]

***

 

[pete_101]

HB: Shall we meet mid/late next week? x

pete_101: mid to late

i don't get it?

so if i were to send that.. then just leave it and try again next week, if she rejects it as well then there's my answer.

 

[pete_101]

Pete, you ask way too many goddamn questions. In fact, you ask so many damn questions, you had to sign up for a 2nd account just to allow yourself to ask new questions.

i know, i really dont know what im doing anymore. literally all this PUA stuff, none of it is making sense to me, if i look at the raw facts.. she hasn't given me a definite time, any answer which isn't a good enough answer should be ignored.

i honestly dont know what to do, i ask for advice, by the time i get it it's already moved on in the interaction and i've sent a msg.

 

[pdx1138]

well, first off I never try to set a date for same day / next day for somebody new. If you've been seeing each other for more than a month sure, but never with a new one.....they usually are busy or have plans. It seldom works and just not a good idea...more likely to say no.

Get back to her tomorrow...not today...and set up a time with her....if she flakes...forget about her and move along.

 

[pete_101]

well, first off I never try to set a date for same day / next day for somebody new. If you've been seeing each other for more than a month sure, but never with a new one.....they usually are busy or have plans. It seldom works and just not a good idea...more likely to say no.

Get back to her tomorrow...not today...and set up a time with her....if she flakes...forget about her and move along.

yeah that's what i usually do, dont know why i offered the same night..i think cos the other plate cancelled.

are you saying set up a time with her in advance for next week? that's over 7 days away.

What about if i just ignored the message all together and just contacted her next week?

i want to convey the msg that i'm not happy with her answer of next week, it just seems like she's fobbing me off and hoping i'll agree to it and then recontact her next week i.e. beta male behavior. unless she's going abroad i dont think her text is acceptable for her a woman with high IL, maybe she's testing me cos i seemed too eager and available. i dont know.

 

[pete_101]

HB: Shall we meet mid/late next week? x

pete_101: mid to late

btw if i send this above, what does this achieve?

im contemplating ignoring it and contacting next week. right now im just stewing on what to do. if i dont contact is there any chance she'd offer a time over the weekend?

 

[st_99]

btw if i send this above, what does this achieve?

im contemplating ignoring it and contacting next week. right now im just stewing on what to do. if i dont contact is there any chance she'd offer a time over the weekend?

its just banter, thats all. You're basically pointing out her silliness in a playful way. What does it achieve? Who knows, wait for a response. But forget it know, she probably will just be confused as it was meant to be sent right after she sent you the orignal message.

 

[pete_101]

its just banter, thats all. You're basically pointing out her silliness in a playful way. What does it achieve? Who knows, wait for a response. But forget it know, she probably will just be confused as it was meant to be sent right after she sent you the orignal message.

i haven't sent it.. i haven't sent anything, should i respond with something now it's been about 20 hours since?

i see what you mean, cos she's scheduling something so far in advance it should make her feel silly. i just feel that it's a test to get me to agree to it, and when i do follow up next week she'll just give me a flakey answer i.e. get me to chase to feel validated.

if i dont reply is she likely to wonder why and follow up with a more firm offer next week?

by me not replying it's basically saying that 'next week mid to late' is not acceptable of an answer and you've lost my attention. is this likely to play on her mind IF she had interest?

 

[Mantis Toboggan]

i haven't sent it.. i haven't sent anything, should i respond with something now it's been about 20 hours since?

i see what you mean, cos she's scheduling something so far in advance it should make her feel silly. i just feel that it's a test to get me to agree to it, and when i do follow up next week she'll just give me a flakey answer i.e. get me to chase to feel validated.

if i dont reply is she likely to wonder why and follow up with a more firm offer next week?

by me not replying it's basically saying that 'next week mid to late' is not acceptable of an answer and you've lost my attention. is this likely to play on her mind IF she had interest?

I don't care how much guys on this site complain about females....When a guy can't send a damn text without asking 500 questions about it, this reflects poorly on men. Well, not all men...but weak men like this.

And don't give me that "Women made us this way." stuff either.

 

[st_99]

i haven't sent it.. i haven't sent anything, should i respond with something now it's been about 20 hours since?

i see what you mean, cos she's scheduling something so far in advance it should make her feel silly. i just feel that it's a test to get me to agree to it, and when i do follow up next week she'll just give me a flakey answer i.e. get me to chase to feel validated.

if i dont reply is she likely to wonder why and follow up with a more firm offer next week?

by me not replying it's basically saying that 'next week mid to late' is not acceptable of an answer and you've lost my attention. is this likely to play on her mind IF she had interest?

i call troll. end of thread. i see the sarcasm dude, i get it.

 

[Mantis Toboggan]

i call troll. end of thread.

I've been calling troll for a few days.

Even the worst of AFCs can just take the advice, process it, and move on. This 20-question thing reeks of effort.

 

[pete101]

i call troll. end of thread. i see the sarcasm dude, i get it.

I'm not a troll! honestly, I want your advice what to say/do.. I really am that pathetic that i need to ask for help

Do you really think I would make such an effort in all my threads with texts i've received to just use it to troll?

No, i genuinely need advice.

 

[pete101]

i call troll. end of thread. i see the sarcasm dude, i get it.

there's no sarcasm.. my questions are genuine. I always send the wrong texts and i dont know why.

it's why i seek guidance so i dont have to keep going back to sarging and losing plates. I always lose them in between dates, never on the dates.

 

[perseverance]

You don't need to use PUA material to get women, Pete! You just need to use your intelligence and look at situations from a pragmatic view point. If a girl is busy then she is busy, just arrange another day to chill together. It's no big deal. If she flakes on you again, just leave the ball in her court and move on. If she's interested, she'll get back in contact with you.

 

[pete101]

so i ended up sending this on saturday instead:

hey sorry for the late reply, been busy. dont worry i haven't forgot about u. i only respond to definite time offers straight away otherwise usually forget to reply.

i think i made the right move, i communicated that if she doesn't offer me a definite firm time i'm not going to respond to her swiftly or agree to anything.

is this likely to get her to actually offer me a time now? ball is in her court.