"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Is this an ok approach?

Frenchconnection

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So I've tried it a few times on cute waitresses, it's not innovative..

I basically wait for a good time and then come up to them and chit chat for a moment and then ask them "by the way are you single?"

I keep the whole approach short since that they're working and I don't want to get them in trouble. Of course during the meal I plant some seeds by kidding with them and stuff.

But is the "are you single" line good?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Lord Shinra

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I wouldn't try it at my local diner.
But thats because the waitresses are mega b1tches who act as if they're too good for anyone looking for a meal. *shakes head*

But my approach to "kick the tires" on that aspect of their life is just ask questions and beat around the bush, if they have one, he'll come up. For me, 100% success rate.
 

Dongfu

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The "general rule" is, dont ask a question that might get you an answer you dont want to hear. Rather than ask her something, tell her something. Something funny, or an interesting observation or comment will get you a reaction. How she reacts will tell you how to proceed.

Are you single could get you a rejection. And her answer might not be the truth.
 

Frenchconnection

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Well that's the thing, I'd rather (in situations where time is limited) to go straight to the point.

The funny thing is.. one time the waitress said "yes" and she was about to give me her # then looked around and then took mine but hasn't called.

Tonight I got an honest "no".

Of course keep in mind again that I do warm them up prior to asking.


I wouldn't be so direct if the situation was different but given that they're working and all..
 

Dongfu

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If you're eating at this restaurant, then you have enough time to keep building rapport every time she comes to your table. Get her going on a conversation that continues every time she comes to the table. When she asks you, "will there be anything else?" Say, "no, just you're phone # and that should just about do it."

SMile at her, maintain eye contact, and wait for her response.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Frenchconnection

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Dongfu said:
If you're eating at this restaurant, then you have enough time to keep building rapport every time she comes to your table. Get her going on a conversation that continues every time she comes to the table. When she asks you, "will there be anything else?" Say, "no, just you're phone # and that should just about do it."

SMile at her, maintain eye contact, and wait for her response.

Ok I'll try that, thx!
 

Dongfu

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One more thing. You have to start the process immediatly, and keep thing progressing continually.

First, scope out the restarant for the cutest waitress. Make sure you're gonna sit in her section. If there is a hostess, tell her you want to sit in the section of the waitress you like. If the waitress seats you her self, talk to her on the way to the table. When she comes to take you're order, ask her what she reccomends.

I always try to find funny sexual enuendo's to comment about on the menu. You could also open conversation with some other people seated near you. It would be really good if you could have them laughing when the waitress returns. Then she'll see that you're an interesting person.
 

Snow Plowman

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Stop with all this "Are you single?", I don't understand why people ask that its irrelevant.

What you have to do with any chicks working is take it out of the frame of customer/worker. That is key. Notice how you could talk to working girls no problem if you had to ask a question framed in the whole customer/worker frame, thats because you know the subtle rules and that its her job to serve you or whatever.

The thing is you gotta break that frame and create your own frame and game her from there.

"Dongfu" has some pretty good ideas

Just remember do not stay in her frame of worker/customer. What I usually do is misinterpret what is being said or asked. Or I'll just start my own thread and just break her frame by saying a random thing.
 

Frenchconnection

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Snow Plowman said:
Stop with all this "Are you single?", I don't understand why people ask that its irrelevant.

What you have to do with any chicks working is take it out of the frame of customer/worker. That is key. Notice how you could talk to working girls no problem if you had to ask a question framed in the whole customer/worker frame, thats because you know the subtle rules and that its her job to serve you or whatever.

The thing is you gotta break that frame and create your own frame and game her from there.

"Dongfu" has some pretty good ideas

Just remember do not stay in her frame of worker/customer. What I usually do is misinterpret what is being said or asked. Or I'll just start my own thread and just break her frame by saying a random thing.
Ok then so at the end you just ask for the number not the "are you single" question right?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Rhoto

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"I'd like to continue our conversation. Do you have a number I can reach you at?"

or offer her yours and say: "But don't call me a 2am for booty, I get enough of those."
 

Snow Plowman

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Frenchconnection said:
Ok then so at the end you just ask for the number not the "are you single" question right?
Just ask for it, knowing whether she is single or not is really irrelevant because she will tell you as a sh!t test anyway or she might just hide it all together. So there is no need to ask it...also if you don't care if she has a BF then it wouldn't even matter anyway because you can still keep it going.

Asking for the # is as easy as just saying "Hey what's your #"

Other ways...
- Force qualifying and go for the #
- Lead her and Request # (example "Here is what I want you to do, when you go bring the check find a pen and paper, right down your # and a cute little smiley face so I can remember you, then bring the check with the paper and drop it on the table, I will give you a call and will got on a wild adventure")
- "Whats your # you need some excitement in your life." (She giggles) "I know how it is everyday you come to work doing the same routine, but today your had some excitement a connection, and I can tell your not the type of girl to build connections THIS easy. (Nice cold read) I'm the coolest guy you've ever met in this place."

See it doesn't have to be complex and can naturally flow out either way.
 
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