Is this a rather radical way to cure oneitis?

[LostInThoughts]

Hello guys =) I have been reading articles on this site for quite a while now and tonight something kind of came up into my mind and I wanted to ask whether my thinking is good or not.

Please note that English is not my first language so please excuse me if there are any grammatical errors.

So, like a lot of people here, I stumbled upon this site while trying to find a cure to oneitis. I am very, very happy to have found out about this site as it has taught me a lot about life and what I am supposed to be doing in order to truly become a man. During these months, I picked up a sport, ate more healthily masturbated less often, been doing push ups and crunches (almost daily) and I have been feeling a lot better than I used to. However, the oneitis problem is still there and I am getting quite frustrated about it.

A lot of people say the best cure to oneitis is to cut all contact with her but something really strike my mind. Everytime after hanging out with her(my friends are tight with hers, so we hang out quite often as a group) I would feel like sh!t and then(somehow) there is this strong desire to improve my life in general. Honestly I really like this feeling because it kind of pushes me forward and when I am not motivated to do anything I would just try to remember the pain of oneitis and then I would have momentum again.

So what I am thinking of doing is that I am not going to cut contact with her but to try to hang out with her as much as possible. This way I would feel more and more pain and consequently this pain maybe able to tranformed into energy to improve my life in general. Am I thinking in the wrong way or is this actually possible?

So in the end I want to be able to look at her and feel absolutely NOTHING instead of butterflies in my stomach. This is the goal I am getting at.

Thanks in advance.

 

[F!DELITY]

It's certainly innovative.

You do kind of have a point. When I suffered oneitis a couple years back, it got so extreme to the point where I was completely drained mentally and physically from it, and after that I was completely over it. It's strange.

 

[WhitePimp]

I'm no psychologist, but to me it sounds like your one-itis is starting to mess with your head, and you've concocted this psychotic stockholm-syndromesque scheme to keep seeing her and being around her, all in the name of "self-improvement". I get what you're trying to do, but subjecting yourself to this kind of anguish is just strange and regressive. Better to use that time to cut contact, go to a gym, work out, and truly improve yourself. Making yourself miserable around this girl will not attract other girls.

 

[katatonia]

No, the cure for oneitis is to go out and bang other hotter chicks.

 

[bish0p]

No, the cure for oneitis is to go out and bang other hotter chicks.

No it's not.

 

[starplayer]

No it's not.

Well yeah it kinda is. Remember GFTOW (Go Fvck Ten Other Women) - the original solution to oneitis.

But also self-improvement and keeping away from her while keeping busy with other things in life (school, job, friends, family, hobbies, etc.). Minimize contact and time will cure oneitis.

 

[bish0p]

Minimize contact and time will cure oneitis.

That's the cure and the only cure.

Having sex with multiple women is more of a preventative measure.

 

[jnice48146]

The OP sounds like a bit of an emotional masochist to me. I agree with the others, find something else to drive you.

 

[boomerick]

I'm thinking of giving up heroine by doubling the number of times I fix each day! I figure my lack of heartbeat and zero brain function will inspire me to quit using. YGTBFSM!!!! N...E...X...T...!!!!!



(self improvement comes from within)

 

[tappa]

mmm..

the only thing better than cure is prevention.. dont fall in love

 

[horaholic]

Cure for oneitis:

1. Dont contact them, or they will stick in your mind.
2. Get with other women, so you realize they arent as special as you think.
3. And time.

I disagree with Bishop. If I get hung up on a girl, she stays in my mind untill she's replaced (even with another prospect). I usually have at least one girl on my mind. To get her out of it, I gotta get another girl in there instead. And I dont mean oneitis with another girl, either

 

[Ease]

That's the cure and the only cure.

Having sex with multiple women is more of a preventative measure.

To definitive cure to oneitis is to replace.

Bang another girl. Bang 10 other girls. Get a new one.

Realising that girls are interchangable and not special, that the same feelings and happy memories can be recreated by someone different.

 

[bish0p]

This is the thing, if you have the ability to go out and date other women, then you don't have oneitis (I see it as being an extreme case of infatuation, or obsession).

I've read far too many stories (and also going on my own experiences) where guys have just recently gotten out of a relationship only to start dating soon after. They go out and get laid, but are still left unfulfilled because they no longer have that intimate relationship with the new women that they had with the ex.

In other words, none of the newer women compare to their ex's.

However, as time goes by (a month...maybe longer), they eventually get to a place where they aren't as desperate anymore for that one girl and they can start dating again with a good mentality.

So, I stand by my word that time is the only cure for people who are suffering it.

Now, if you already have prospects lined up, then you don't have this problem. If you can go out and date immediately afterward and get over someone that quickly, then you don't have oneitis.

It's like having the same type of relationship with a really close friend or family member.

 

[horaholic]

I dumped my ex 4 and a half years ago. Noone compares to here, and I still think about her nonstop. Time didnt work. The only time she;s been out of my head has been a few breif periods when I really liked other girls. So, i can say firsthand, that time itself doesnt always work. There has to be a replacement sometimes. Thats not to say that you dont need time as well, cuz you do, but oftentimes it takes someone else to fill the void.