Is there even ONE straight, kind, solvent single man in his 40s left in Britain?

[MatureDJ]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/a...kind-solvent-single-man-40s-left-Britain.html

Oh my, this is classic!

I have been single for the past four years and have dated a handful of men. As far as I can see, they fall into two distinct camps.

There are the overgrown 'kidults' - men who have degenerated into hopeless commitment-phobes and just want to have 'fun' (ie lots of sex) with taut twenty-somethings. They just seem to seek endless couplings, often facilitated by the internet.

Then there are the successful, solvent divorcés who are so determined to find wife number two pronto that they approach dating like a cold business transaction.

...

Believe me, in all this it's not a case of us women being unrealistic or fussy. It's our male counterparts who are more exacting, arrogant and demanding than we could ever be, and who have this vile presumption that they are some kind of sought-after prize that we would be so lucky to 'get'.

For once, they feel in a position of power in the sex war - and they are exploiting it for all it's worth.

...

My friend Lizzie, a 43-year-old art director, says it was a real surprise to start dating at 40 after her marriage ended.

'I've always had boyfriends before, but I've been single for three years now, as I'm not so attractive a proposition any more. I've had a child and have responsibility, which these immature men of our age see as terrifying baggage - which is hypocritical when many of them have ex-wives who are bringing up their kids.'

...

Another girlfriend of mine, Francesca, 40, who works in advertising and has never married or had children, echoes the exasperation we feel.

'Of course I'd love to be in a relationship, but I haven't got the energy to waste with men who can't commit. I do think there are perfectly well-adjusted men out there, but they are already in relationships.'

Francesca was seeing a man who took her out to dinner often, yet told her he couldn't have a relationship with her because he was waiting for the woman who would 'knock his socks off'.

But, as she rightly points out: 'He doesn't let any woman close enough to knock his socks off, which is probably why he's having casual sex with a twenty-something work colleague.'

...

Relationship counsellor Tom McCabe says: 'There is a stunting of male emotional growth from about the age of 14, which they cover up with charm, good looks or cleverness as they grow up. If these men are still single in their 40s, or become single again, they look in the mirror and want to be 18, whereas a forty-something woman is more realistic about herself.

'These men are looking for girls, but women are looking for men. I continually have to say to men who come to me: "Please don't refer to women as birds, chicks, babes or even girls."

'The situation is worse today because more men are becoming single again in their 40s,' he says. 'It's all about recapturing their youth. They need to grow up, change their language and start seeing women for who they are.'

...

We genuinely like men and would love affection and a loving relationship. But not at the cost of subjugating ourselves to the whims of a misogynist with his eye on the young girl across the restaurant.

We've learned to enrich ourselves, and our female friendships have become our lifeline. And we live in hope of a miracle.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear MDJ,
Seems like the British Men have at last come into their own...The tipping Point has come...Make the most of it Guys....Judging from the US Posts Americas Brothers are just a little bit behind....Welcome to the Brave New World Girls.

 

[Burroughs]

from the article : "These men are so adept at sizing you up - your wealth and your looks - that they don't bother to see who you really are. And they don't care that an intelligent forty-something woman like me seeks a spark of recognition, of mutual companionship and respect."

Don't the old spinsters just hate it when the shoes on the other foot.

One thing that would be useful is if younger women 20-27 (ie the chicks I look for) would study these older women and realize THIS COULD BE ME! No chance of that however, no woman ever thinks she's going to grow old and optionless...UNTIL SHE DOES.

 

[backbreaker]

seriously matureDJ, not bashing you or anything at all,

but, are you okay? what's with all the points pointing out these antics? there are some ****ed up people on earth no doubt but it's like you spend all day just looking the internet for the most ****ed up stories you can find. do you hate women? Do you think men are better than women?

I just don't see the point in all this. you are pointing out the obvious; women can be cruel, heartless and ruthless, we (seriously) get it. It doens't mean all women are as such, no more than it means all men are lazy, lack ambition and simple minded as the article the other day you posted suggested.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Backbreaker,
You Posts show,your personal Philosophy has evolved remarkably....can't you see that you are an Einstein in these matters when many of the non posting youngsters who read this are just learning their times tables....And MDJ you are our Librarian in residence...you are constantly directing my somewhat jaded interests into greener fields.
...More strength to your Elbow.

 

[Rubirosa]

I read the article......
As a 46 year old, I do look in the mirror and want to be 18 again....PHYSICALY....which is why I work out constantly and do everything I can to have my body look like the water polo playing 18 year old I was.....
But I would NEVER, EVER, EVER, want to go back to being the chumpy, insecure boy I was at 18.
That's the beauty of getting older. You finally have the house and cars you always wanted, you build a life that you want for yourself, you gain maturity and a different outlook on life, then you work at keeping your body young....a receipe for happiness.
The article misses the point of the different goals at different points in age between genders....

 

[Zarky]

what's with all the points pointing out these antics? there are some ****ed up people on earth no doubt but it's like you spend all day just looking the internet for the most ****ed up stories you can find.

Unfortunately the "mature" section of this board is less about seducing women and more about b1tching about them.

 

[mrRuckus]

Three types of women:

Those hot enough to fvck, those who can burst into flames, and my mom.

 

[sstype]

Another entitled hag bitter she can't get City high-flyers and executives to commit to her.

Men with age become gentler and more graceful at treating women which is why they become more attractive to women. You see, men are always being judged when going on dates with women and in relationships since they are teens, and all women mostly do is judge men, so when women get old the **** really hits the fan for them because they never learned all the things men learned through their life out of constantly being judged by women. Older men become pros at attracting women, on the other hand women become pros at judging men and looking for faults.

No wonder nobody wants to date older chicks.

 

[omkara]

Men with age become gentler and more graceful at treating women which is why they become more attractive to women. You see, men are always being judged when going on dates with women and in relationships since they are teens, and all women mostly do is judge men, so when women get old the **** really hits the fan for them because they never learned all the things men learned through their life out of constantly being judged by women. Older men become pros at attracting women, on the other hand women become pros at judging men and looking for faults.

Actually this is happening to me now. I had to learn through trial and error why I was losing girls, and that it's ok to show some affection. I was being a caricature of a PUA and losing girls not by acting AFC, but by being an *******. I lose a far smaller percentage of my leads now, after about 3 years of trial and error. Basically you are dead on, in my experience.

Why didn't anyone ever tell me it's ok to be nice and show affection to girls? This is what I think of as being smooth, gentlemanly (but not in a supplicating way), cultured, like you know what the f*** you are doing when you are seducing a woman. Even if you do sweet-talk them a little, they probably think you are insincere and say that to all the girls anyway, so it doesn't necessarily blow your frame.

 

[zekko]

Why didn't anyone ever tell me it's ok to be nice and show affection to girls?

This site operates on the assumption that every guy's problem with girls is the same: That he's a pedestalizing, supplicant, AFC. So it assumes that you are already showing too much affection to the girl, and spends every bit of its energy trying to convince you to move in the opposite direction.

This doesn't speak to me much since my tendency with women is to be too aloof.

I always wonder what if a guy comes here who is failing with women because he's too much of a jerk? What's going to happen to him? Lol.

 

[vatoloco]

I had to learn through trial and error why I was losing girls, and that it's ok to show some affection. I was being a caricature of a PUA and losing girls not by acting AFC, but by being an *******. I lose a far smaller percentage of my leads now, after about 3 years of trial and error. Basically you are dead on, in my experience.

Why didn't anyone ever tell me it's ok to be nice and show affection to girls? This is what I think of as being smooth, gentlemanly (but not in a supplicating way), cultured, like you know what the f*** you are doing when you are seducing a woman.

You're just not reading the right posts about affection and emotions.

 

[SecondHalf]

...More strength to your Elbow.

This made me laugh out loud on an otherwise rather frustrating work day.
Thank you!

Didn't enjoy the article, but the comments on this topic made it a good thread!

SH

 

[Strelok]

No matter what, no matter how its always man's fault.
Than they complain nobody gives a fvck about them...

Listen girls, I mean oldies, the only reason you had men before or you were engaged it was because of your body good enough to attract men, not you, not your personality or status but the pure sum of your meat.
To which you can add the low self confidence and desperation of the average young man.

Now those two elements are died and gone so its up to you to grow the fvck up and stop b1tchig, hit the god damn gym, aknowledge the fact that what you put on the table is not that much and negotiate....we men are used to do that,since we are 10 yrs old and our marks or sexlife depends on unpredictable illogical b1tches

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear MDJ,
"Is there even ONE straight, kind, solvent single man in his 40s left in Britain?".....What about our very own Jeremy Jeremy?....Yeah and lets see how he is treated?but he has been dragged screaming into the idea of gaming Birds,I have not given up on him by any means!

 

[betheman]

"Is there even ONE straight, kind, solvent single man in his 40s left in Britain?"


Yup! right here