Is she interested or bored?

[slaog]

I'm chatting to a girl online for the past week or so. She's in a relationship but complains her man is never there and is always away on business. She said said she loves him and is looking for a friendship but not ruling out a relationship.

Sometimes during our conversations she'll mention 'her man'... like what he bought her etc. Alot of times she mentions what he likes eg he doesn't like her wearing earrings for example. I don't react to this but I'm wondering is it a test?

She gives me plenty of compliments and calls me unique etc etc..

So basically my understanding of it is she is with him but ready to jump ship or on the other hand she could be just using me because she is bored. Should I demand we meet as soon as possible?

I havn't oneitis for her.

 

[slaog]

After talking about other girls to her tonight she suddenly decided to meet. She said that it doesn't matter if we don't like each other because she's not looking for a boyfriend.

However yesterday she was saying she's afraid to meet incase she feels one of us doesn't like the other!

 

[Jitterbug]

I'm chatting to a girl online for the past week or so. She's in a relationship but complains her man is never there and is always away on business. She said said she loves him and is looking for a friendship but not ruling out a relationship.

She's looking to branch-swing.

Sometimes during our conversations she'll mention 'her man'... like what he bought her etc. Alot of times she mentions what he likes eg he doesn't like her wearing earrings for example. I don't react to this but I'm wondering is it a test?

She gives me plenty of compliments and calls me unique etc etc..

She's testing to see if you're a BBD - Bigger Better Deal. She's essentially telling you "Here's what I'm currently getting. Can you beat that? What can you offer me?"

 

[slaog]

She's looking to branch-swing.



She's testing to see if you're a BBD - Bigger Better Deal. She's essentially telling you "Here's what I'm currently getting. Can you beat that? What can you offer me?"

yeah i thought that alright. Another thing she said was I'm probably too young for her (she's 29 and likes older men) but I just said go date older men if you want.

So we're meeting saturday and see how it goes. If she likes me I'll tell her it's me or him or she could be a 'friend with benefits'.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Slaog,
She is a rather juvenile lady,bored with her boy friend,maybe she fancies the idea of men fighting over her....best conclusion is a casual friend with benefits,if you get emotionally involved you will get the same treatment she is giving him...Use her as she would use you...

 

[Juando]

If she likes me I'll tell her it's me or him or she could be a 'friend with benefits'.

-if SHE likes you?

Who's steering this ship?
What about if YOU think she's worth it?

Just a thought.

 

[jophil28]

yeah

So we're meeting saturday and see how it goes. If she likes me I'll tell her it's me or him or she could be a 'friend with benefits'.

Even if she thought you were as hot as B. Pitt, any attempt by your to force her to choose would not lead her in your direction BECAUSE you have not had time to establish yourself as a man of VALUE yet. That takes time.

Secondly, why are you chasing a "branch swinger" or an on-line AW ? Branch swinging is a close cousin to cheating. If she will do it with you, she will do it TO you..

Most inportantly , smart men do not get in triangles ...

 

[slaog]

Dear Slaog,
She is a rather juvenile lady,bored with her boy friend,maybe she fancies the idea of men fighting over her....best conclusion is a casual friend with benefits,if you get emotionally involved you will get the same treatment she is giving him...Use her as she would use you...

Thats my intention. I wouldn't trust her 100%.

-if SHE likes you?

Who's steering this ship?
What about if YOU think she's worth it?

Just a thought.

You're right!

Even if she thought you were as hot as B. Pitt, any attempt by your to force her to choose would not lead her in your direction BECAUSE you have not had time to establish yourself as a man of VALUE yet. That takes time.

Secondly, why are you chasing a "branch swinger" or an on-line AW ? Branch swinging is a close cousin to cheating. If she will do it with you, she will do it TO you..

Most inportantly , smart men do not get in triangles ...

I'm not really chasing her if anything she's chasing me more. I have established some value already but I take your point!

There won't be a triangle for long though because it seems to strange for me.

Want to her something funny, we were talking about looks and she said out of the blue that she thought B.Pitt looked like a woman! haha

 

[slaog]

Had the date tonight. We got on well, plenty of eye contact and touching etc and she enjoyed herself too, so see how it goes. She would be a good plate if nothing else.

 

[Mr. Me]

smart men do not get in triangles

As the third person in it is the one that will lose.

We got on well... She would be a good plate if nothing else.

Here's the problem with that: you MAY develop feelings for her in time and get attached, even though you now think you won't. You can't play around with fire and not ever get singed.

Sometimes during our conversations she'll mention 'her man'... like what he bought her etc. A lot of times she mentions what he likes eg he doesn't like her wearing earrings for example. I don't react to this but I'm wondering is it a test?

You guys think everything's a "test". Instead, a lot of it isn't but what it is, is a reflection of her mind set, that signals what it's all about.


She's lamenting about her boyfriend, so she's not happy with him at this moment, BUT that doesn't mean she's branch swinging or looking to dump him. If she were, she'd be telling you about how she can't stand him. IOW, her complaints would be about how negative SHE feels, not about what HE does or doesn't like. See the difference?

So, she's probably looking for someone to pay her some attention and make her feel good about herself on the side, but for now, she's going to stick with him.

Don't get involved with people like her. She's a two timing AW.

We got on well, plenty of eye contact and touching etc and she enjoyed herself too, so see how it goes.

Ummm, it always goes well at first. It's in her plan. That's why she's "chasing" you.