ChilliWilly
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- Joined
- Dec 15, 2008
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Hello Guys,
My first post here after coming across this site a couple of years ago. What a fantastic resource and I feel a big thank you is in order for all those that have contributed.
Apologies in advance for what I think will be a long post. As well as being my first post here, this is also the first time I’m posting anything on the net, so please bear with me if I’m not conforming to protocol.
A bit about me ….. I’m 38yo living in Scotland, who has had one serious relationship of note, from the age of 23 until I was 30, which I ended. I first came here 2 or 3 years ago after a serious case of one-itis screwed my head up, read the bible and realised how much of an AFC I was. Resolved to strive towards Don Juan-ism. Not there yet as I decided to prioritise on my business and leave relationships on the back burner. So I haven’t had a relationship for quite a few years, but compensated with many f*** buddies. Working long hours and seven days a week meant I didn’t have much time for a social life, so the majority of these f*** buddies have been found on the internet - not exactly honing gaming skills I know.
I own the only convenience store on a large housing estate and at the beginning of November a new customer appeared. A 32yo who I’ll call Rachel. Not my type, but good looking nevertheless, at first I treated her like any other customer. As I got to know her better, I found myself attracted to her and started flirting to which she responded favourably. I should mention that she is a single mother to a 13yo boy and a 4yo girl. After a couple of weeks it became obvious to me she was really keen on me, so I asked her out.
On the afternoon of the date I got a text message saying that her dad, the babysitter for the night, had been called out to work and she was terribly sorry but had to cancel. No problem I thought. Another two dates were arranged over the following week which didn’t happen. The third time I didn’t even get a text. Time to forget about this one I thought.
However I had noticed she was good friends with a girl, Claire, who had worked for me in the past. The next day I asked her what’s going on, I’m getting f***ed around here. She told me, “She is really into you, but she is very scared as she has not been near a man, in bed or out of it, for four years” and “also she isn’t sure about you as she thinks you are a womanizer”
Next day Rachel came and apologised profusely for her behaviour and said tomorrow night for sure. She also mentioned her son was vehemently against her being with any man. At this point I did say to her “I don’t want to come between you and your children” to which she replied “that’s my problem and I’ll deal with it”.
We went out and had a great time. Several times through the night she made it obvious she was up for sex, but I brushed her off. Lots of kissing throughout the night. I dropped her off home.
Now in the first 10 min she told me a bit about herself. She and her brother had been raped at the age of 11 by her mums bf. I think she also said she had sex with her brother at the time too. She claimed she had dealt with her issues but her brother had not. Her brother was and is violent to her. She had been living in a village about 30 miles away until last summer, when her brother attacked her again. This time her son took a baseball bat to him and told him if he ever did it again he would kill him. She felt it was a genuine threat and not wanting her son to become a murderer she left everything and took her kids and a couple of bags, sought out emergency housing and ended up where my store is.
Her sons father had been killed in a car crash when he was 7 or 8, and her daughters father just simply disappeared when she was born - he didn’t want to be a parent. No man in her life since.
The next day she came to see me and told me she had arranged for her kids to be at their mums for the following weekend so we could spend it together.
That night around 11 I got a call form her, she was back in her village at a friends house. I chewed the cud with her friend for a while on the phone when she asked me, can you come and get Rachel and bring her back home. I spoke with Rachel and asked her if she was serious and she said yes, with some humility, and could I? I agreed and said ill set off in 10 minutes. I took my time and it took me an hour before i left home. 10 minutes Into the journey , when I should have been near I got a call asking where I was. Another call 5 minutes later to say “Its ok, don’t bother my Dad is coming instead” I was quite pissed off and turned back.
No contact for 2 days from her and then a text message saying im sorry we were being really stupid, please forgive me. An hour later she turned up in the store apologising. Ok. She invited me over to hers that night. About an hour after I arrived her son turned up and although he was polite with me he was displaying “attitude”. I was told a couple of days later that he went ballistic at his mum “why have you brought a man into the house”
The weekend away was approaching and I hadn’t seen her in the store for a couple of days, nothing abnormal in that, so I tried to call her a few times. Never got a reply, until the Friday when she textewd me to say she’s going to pop over. We arranged details for Saturday. Early on Saturday afternoon she called to say her son had been assaulted by a Police Officer the bight before and she may have to cancel, but she would let me know by 5. No further contact was made that day. I next heard from her on Tuesday , apologised for not being in touch. We had a nice few hours chatting. She had spoke with her son who said “ I don’t mind you seeing him, but please don’t bring him into the house”
She wanted to come to my store when her girl was in kindergarten the following day so we could have sex. I agreed. The next day came and again no contact from her. Until 6 hours later when I got a a text saying “ I only have enough credit left for one more text, so wanted you to know my dad turned up this morning and I wasn’t ignoring you”
By this time I was quite pissed of with her behaviour and normally I would decide not bother anymore.
Easy to do that, but this girl will come into my work everyday and it’s the first girl ive really liked in about 4 years.
Not sure how much of a ramble this post has been so far, lol.
In your opinion is this girl genuinely scared of getting it together with a man, plus the resistance she is getting from her son and work with her slowly at this or just walk away? She has shown quite a bit of disrespectful behaviour to me. Is she BPD or still freaked out at being abandoned by her last partner?
Thanks
My first post here after coming across this site a couple of years ago. What a fantastic resource and I feel a big thank you is in order for all those that have contributed.
Apologies in advance for what I think will be a long post. As well as being my first post here, this is also the first time I’m posting anything on the net, so please bear with me if I’m not conforming to protocol.
A bit about me ….. I’m 38yo living in Scotland, who has had one serious relationship of note, from the age of 23 until I was 30, which I ended. I first came here 2 or 3 years ago after a serious case of one-itis screwed my head up, read the bible and realised how much of an AFC I was. Resolved to strive towards Don Juan-ism. Not there yet as I decided to prioritise on my business and leave relationships on the back burner. So I haven’t had a relationship for quite a few years, but compensated with many f*** buddies. Working long hours and seven days a week meant I didn’t have much time for a social life, so the majority of these f*** buddies have been found on the internet - not exactly honing gaming skills I know.
I own the only convenience store on a large housing estate and at the beginning of November a new customer appeared. A 32yo who I’ll call Rachel. Not my type, but good looking nevertheless, at first I treated her like any other customer. As I got to know her better, I found myself attracted to her and started flirting to which she responded favourably. I should mention that she is a single mother to a 13yo boy and a 4yo girl. After a couple of weeks it became obvious to me she was really keen on me, so I asked her out.
On the afternoon of the date I got a text message saying that her dad, the babysitter for the night, had been called out to work and she was terribly sorry but had to cancel. No problem I thought. Another two dates were arranged over the following week which didn’t happen. The third time I didn’t even get a text. Time to forget about this one I thought.
However I had noticed she was good friends with a girl, Claire, who had worked for me in the past. The next day I asked her what’s going on, I’m getting f***ed around here. She told me, “She is really into you, but she is very scared as she has not been near a man, in bed or out of it, for four years” and “also she isn’t sure about you as she thinks you are a womanizer”
Next day Rachel came and apologised profusely for her behaviour and said tomorrow night for sure. She also mentioned her son was vehemently against her being with any man. At this point I did say to her “I don’t want to come between you and your children” to which she replied “that’s my problem and I’ll deal with it”.
We went out and had a great time. Several times through the night she made it obvious she was up for sex, but I brushed her off. Lots of kissing throughout the night. I dropped her off home.
Now in the first 10 min she told me a bit about herself. She and her brother had been raped at the age of 11 by her mums bf. I think she also said she had sex with her brother at the time too. She claimed she had dealt with her issues but her brother had not. Her brother was and is violent to her. She had been living in a village about 30 miles away until last summer, when her brother attacked her again. This time her son took a baseball bat to him and told him if he ever did it again he would kill him. She felt it was a genuine threat and not wanting her son to become a murderer she left everything and took her kids and a couple of bags, sought out emergency housing and ended up where my store is.
Her sons father had been killed in a car crash when he was 7 or 8, and her daughters father just simply disappeared when she was born - he didn’t want to be a parent. No man in her life since.
The next day she came to see me and told me she had arranged for her kids to be at their mums for the following weekend so we could spend it together.
That night around 11 I got a call form her, she was back in her village at a friends house. I chewed the cud with her friend for a while on the phone when she asked me, can you come and get Rachel and bring her back home. I spoke with Rachel and asked her if she was serious and she said yes, with some humility, and could I? I agreed and said ill set off in 10 minutes. I took my time and it took me an hour before i left home. 10 minutes Into the journey , when I should have been near I got a call asking where I was. Another call 5 minutes later to say “Its ok, don’t bother my Dad is coming instead” I was quite pissed off and turned back.
No contact for 2 days from her and then a text message saying im sorry we were being really stupid, please forgive me. An hour later she turned up in the store apologising. Ok. She invited me over to hers that night. About an hour after I arrived her son turned up and although he was polite with me he was displaying “attitude”. I was told a couple of days later that he went ballistic at his mum “why have you brought a man into the house”
The weekend away was approaching and I hadn’t seen her in the store for a couple of days, nothing abnormal in that, so I tried to call her a few times. Never got a reply, until the Friday when she textewd me to say she’s going to pop over. We arranged details for Saturday. Early on Saturday afternoon she called to say her son had been assaulted by a Police Officer the bight before and she may have to cancel, but she would let me know by 5. No further contact was made that day. I next heard from her on Tuesday , apologised for not being in touch. We had a nice few hours chatting. She had spoke with her son who said “ I don’t mind you seeing him, but please don’t bring him into the house”
She wanted to come to my store when her girl was in kindergarten the following day so we could have sex. I agreed. The next day came and again no contact from her. Until 6 hours later when I got a a text saying “ I only have enough credit left for one more text, so wanted you to know my dad turned up this morning and I wasn’t ignoring you”
By this time I was quite pissed of with her behaviour and normally I would decide not bother anymore.
Easy to do that, but this girl will come into my work everyday and it’s the first girl ive really liked in about 4 years.
Not sure how much of a ramble this post has been so far, lol.
In your opinion is this girl genuinely scared of getting it together with a man, plus the resistance she is getting from her son and work with her slowly at this or just walk away? She has shown quite a bit of disrespectful behaviour to me. Is she BPD or still freaked out at being abandoned by her last partner?
Thanks
... and that would not be so bad, except that you like her. The Drama Family will suck you in, and you will become one of them if you stay with her. Then eventually the kid will swing the bat at you.