is online dating counterproductive?

[Halo]

I reluctantly began dabbling with match.com and similar sites a few months ago, since I wasn't getting much going on in the real world I figured what the hell. So I have met around four girls from online, and so far all of them have turned out to be flakes. The most recent one, who happened to be the only one I was really interested in at all, expressed what seemed like decent interest, but ended up leaving me hanging when we were supposed to meet up on Sunday for our second date (at something -she- suggested no less).

That isn't the real problem though. I think the real problem with online dating is this: it becomes too easy to avoid the more difficult real world approaching, by convincing yourself that you have x number of prospects from those sites. In my case none of them have panned out, so I wonder if I've done nothing but waste time and money.

Now I find myself in an awkward position. I was hoping the online thing might be useful at least as practice, but now I am doubting its usefulness period. I have been out at bars and clubs quite a bit over the past few months, and have made some small progress in those places, but I really just am not liking the sort of girls I meet there so I don't know what to do really.

I think my progress has been set back a bit and I need to figure out how to begin again.

 

[matius]

Sounds like you in motion to me...

Ok, so keep on meeting girls live. If you want, continue on Match or whatever service. Either way, they are not aliens online! They're people, so you'll meet flakes just like in the real world. Just depends on if you want to give it another go. Of the four girls I've interacted with I've been out with three. 3/4...one never panned out, two I've decided not to go out with again, and one, well, I'm still tied up in this silly little game- She is quite delicious mind you.

So, either way you look at it...they're just people. I don't see why people see it as any different. You meet someone, you go out with them- it's no longer 'online.' You are now offline.

 

[jlujan]

Online dating is only different from real life dating in that it facilitates the aproach, you see a person that you like, she checks you out and both agree to "talk" and see what happens, the problem with this is that once you meet the person the online part is left behind and your on your own.

So that is your problem right there, you obviously are atractive enought physically to some women, but you need to have a personality to go with that. Think of it like if you where a fisherman, you have decent bait but your fishing line is weak and can't handle the type of fish you are hooking, thus the line snaps and your fish is gone.

Work on your personality, your attitude, and your presentation, thats the only thing you need.

 

[-Zero_h0uR-]

Online dating is ok...

It's not my gig, but some people here have had success with it (I guess?!) I see lots of people defend it, but I have no proof to say it's good.

I think it's a waste of time, but then again, that's only my opinion. Something about meeting them in person, approaching, starting light banter, number closing....... that's all a lot of fun to me.

I would much rather do that than set up a date through the computer, which to me is the easy way out.

Just my opinion.


-- Zero-

 

[Jvesti123]

Actually, it's good practice, I've been hitting up facethejury.com left and right with saying things and convo's . It's help me work on my convo skills with chicks. I used to ask WAYYY tooo many questions and not enough talk. which scared away a lot of girls but now i'm getting pretty good at getting them interested and getting attractive girls on the other side of the country want to give out their phone numbers to talk