Is 'not caring' key?

[thegamedontwait]

I have this theory. I like to keep things simple.

I think you should ALWAYS have multiple options. Whether you're about to make a move on a chick you like (get some other great options first...).

or whether you've been in an LTR for 5 years (make sure when it comes down to it, you can walk away from it and get with other women just as hot as her IMMEDIATELY - without having to polish your game for half a year and cry like a girl...)

I think if you really have this down, you can keep this relationship stuff pretty simple.

I believe being able to not care a ton is key.

On the one hand it's better for you if the relationship goes broke, because hey you won't care nearly as much...

And on the other hand if you don't care nearly as much, you're less of a wussy wuss --> she'll be more attracted to you --> relationship won't go broke in the first place.

Anyone agrees?

 

[Big Poppa]

My trick is that, yes I don't care, but I also keep myself first. I like, have a hierarchy in my head.

1. Me
2. Family
3. Friends
4. Girls

As you can see, what girls do to me shouldn't affect me as much because well, they don't really matter. They're bottom feeders.

So in the end, I start not caring what the girls think at all. I don't have this complete mind set yet, but I'm working on it

 

[trent81]

Not caring is not the right word, I would say "not emotionally invested too much" would be better. All guys care, we are human. But if you are less emotionally invested on someone, the chances of your emotional recovery is greater than the other person. You just have to love yourself and know that if she were to leave tomorrow, you would be perfectly happy alone, or can find another. If you truly feel that way, she will smell it and be more attracted to you.

 

[thegamedontwait]

Haha your signature is pretty well-aligned with my idea Trent!

By "not caring" i didn't mean not caring/loving your girlfriend.......but simply caring a lot less if a break up happens, because you know you can get over it within an acceptable time...

I think of it as a safety mechanism you should always have set up for yourself.

The best part of it, though, I think is that....the less you care about a potential break up, the more the chick is going to be attracted to you....it's kind of a catch-22 just in a positive way, isn't it?LOL

 

[Weezy]

I have this theory. I like to keep things simple.

I think you should ALWAYS have multiple options. Whether you're about to make a move on a chick you like (get some other great options first...).

or whether you've been in an LTR for 5 years (make sure when it comes down to it, you can walk away from it and get with other women just as hot as her IMMEDIATELY - without having to polish your game for half a year and cry like a girl...)

I think if you really have this down, you can keep this relationship stuff pretty simple.

I believe being able to not care a ton is key.

On the one hand it's better for you if the relationship goes broke, because hey you won't care nearly as much...

And on the other hand if you don't care nearly as much, you're less of a wussy wuss --> she'll be more attracted to you --> relationship won't go broke in the first place.

Anyone agrees?

I get ****ed by this all the time.

I'm currently in the 6 months to get your game back quit crying like a little ***** phase. Last 4 LTR's, same ****.

Here's how it goes down:

-I find them attractive, they like me, I just try and date em tell they give it up.
- I start hitting it, then they want a relationship, which you either give them or don't. Then they start hinting about saying ILU.
- I hang out with them on your terms for a year or 2, they love you more than anything, do whatever you want cause you don't give a ****, tell them they love you all the time, buy you ****, etc.
- They start wanting to get married or move in or some ****, start *****ing about it and whining that I don't give them enough and I work too much, golf too much, hang out with my boys to much.. I get sick of the *****ing everytime we hang out, and it's not as fun anymore. We start fighting.
- They get sick of me not giving a ****, start looking for someone who does, I have my blinders on and don't do anything. Start getting pissed when they have a new "friend" they talk about all the time.
- They wanna break up cause I'm a **** and don't care about them, they start ****ing their "friend" and I'm left in a 6 month recovery phase where I whine like a little girl (see my other posts) Think about them 24 / 7. Become way less productive until I finally get my game and confidence back up and pull another chick worth a LTR.

Every ****en time I'm left heartbroken.

 

[slaog]

Its about having the strength to do the right thing and walk away.

 

[RMM]

Not caring is not the right word, I would say "not emotionally invested too much" would be better.

That is correct. If you take it too far and truly don't care at all, well, you're not going to get very far. Trust me on that!

Then again, at that point you wouldn't care how far you get, would you?

 

[909pua]

you have to do the push pull effect. act like you care about them when you see them in person but act like you dont give a sh..t when they are away from you. it will drive them nuts

 

[ELITE]

I have this theory. I like to keep things simple.

I think you should ALWAYS have multiple options. Whether you're about to make a move on a chick you like (get some other great options first...).

or whether you've been in an LTR for 5 years (make sure when it comes down to it, you can walk away from it and get with other women just as hot as her IMMEDIATELY - without having to polish your game for half a year and cry like a girl...)

I think if you really have this down, you can keep this relationship stuff pretty simple.

I believe being able to not care a ton is key.

On the one hand it's better for you if the relationship goes broke, because hey you won't care nearly as much...

And on the other hand if you don't care nearly as much, you're less of a wussy wuss --> she'll be more attracted to you --> relationship won't go broke in the first place.

Anyone agrees?

Yea i agree, and women these days you need to have that attitude. Its hard not to catch feelings at times if you feel her. I try to say the same thing, but end up catching feelings at times. Yes you need to keep your guard up with women. And learn from your last break up and how you got hurt. Be more picky, make sure she has good qualites, and morals. I dont think it good to get envolved, with women on myspace or all those chatting sites. Their use to it, in when things go wrong between you guys, theirs always a fag who wants to be her crying shoulder. I dont think I will ever get envolved with women who are constintly on chatting sites. Only to have fun with. Your just asking for problems.

 

[strong like bull]

this illustrates a line that divides the "jerk" or "player" vs a "real man" or "great guy." a line that separates the difference in maturity levels.

the jerk, player or bad boy truly doesnt care. he does not connect emotionally with the girl. while it protects his heart, he also loses out on much that could be gained from the connection. hes so afraid to be hurt by a girl, that he inadvertently shields himself from love also. its easy to fake confidence by being careless or negging people all the time.

the great guy or real man, who is mature and experienced is open to the connection, but knows the womans place in his life. he operates from a position of confidence. he gives his care, but knows that it is to be respected. and most important of all, the real man knows this:

in ANY situation in life, you can NEVER be afraid to walk away from a bad deal

a bad deal with with work, women, friends, strangers, anything.

make no mistake; the key is not to be careless. it is to be confident enough to know your goals, ambitions and place in life. to know your value. to know that IF a girl starts acting wacky, you arent gonna stand for it. be compassionate, but never a chump or pushover.

youd be missing out on a lot that life has to over, if you were never compassionate or cared. just remember to always operate from a position of strength, confidence and stick to your guns.

-SLB

 

[Cherokee]

I don't even think it's "don't be too invested". But yeah the power to success is indifference, once you learn that "love" is natures way of making you stick around long enough to pop out some sprogs, you realise to just enjoy the good times and not ponder about the future all the time.

One of my best mates lives by the power of indifference, not even conciously, he just is, and he has the most success with women I've ever seen.