Is it worth it to compete with another guy for a girl?

[Production6257]

Okay, here's a quick synopsis: I met a girl at my college, she is pretty damn hot and about as cool of a girl as your ever going to meet. We have been talking, teasing back and forth, and for once the whole C+F thing is actually working for me. She told my friend that she "likes" me a few days ago. Here is the tricky part: Her "ex" is still in her life, and I guess she's still trying to figure out if she wants to still be with him or not (She's listed as "It's Complicated" on facebook with this guy).

Well we're having people over at our apartment tomorrow, then we are going to my friend's house party. Here's the kicker: She's bringing this guy with her! She is still flirting with me a lot though.

So what should I do? I think this girl is awesome, which scares me because I don't usually get this way around girls and I don't want to get the dreaded "oneitis". Should I just forget it instead of trying to "prove" myself to this girl?

 

[Obsidian]

Ganji her. Consider NEXTing.

She sounds pretty screwy. She definitely doesn't sound like "as cool of a girl as" I'm "ever going to meet." Don't be blinded by her looks, man. Don't let her f*ck with your head.

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

Just play it cool and don't act desperate. When, you see her. Go up and spark some Interest Level in her. (Not when she first comes over.) Then, go about your biziness and interact/have fun wit other people. Do a Push-Pull type thing with her. Don't act jealous or mad is she is with her ex.

If she starts yakin about her ex when she is talking to you. Just say: "I don't think this will work out between us. Give me a call sometime when your over your ex and ill see if i'm avaible." Then, smile and walk away. Your basicly nexting her by doing this but, it may show you have higher value than her.

Hopefully, some of this will help you.

 

[Bible_Belt]

I guess she's still trying to figure out if she wants to still be with him or not (She's listed as "It's Complicated" on facebook with this guy).

The guys I know who put up with that "it's complicated" crap on facebook are complete AFCs, the worst of the worst, follow a girl around like a puppy dog kind of guys. Think about it. Would any of us put up with sh!t like that? Would you still follow around a girl who disrespected you like that?

On the one hand, all men are in competition for the hot women, but on the other hand, he is obviously an AFC, so there really is no competition. I can tell you right now that he will be all over her at that party. Just act mostly indifferent, maybe shoot her a flirty look or two but that's all. You can also use the 'you two make a cute couple' line, but don't give her any swordfight drama. He will bore her, you will make her wonder, then later after he's gone, she will hook up with you. You'll be breaking the poor afc bf's heart, but then again it is really him doing it to himself.

 

[Obsidian]

that's an interesting point, Bible Belt, but I still don't know if he should even bother with a girl who likes to toy around with two different guys at the same time

But yeah, do what these two guys have suggested if you decide she's actually worth a second thought.

 

[Bonez]

Talk to the damned guy!!!!

If your going to compete with him at least let the guy know so it will be fair!

Damned newbies giving out advice too. Guys syfu if your only guessing let people with experience answer the guy.

 

[Production6257]

I guess she's still trying to figure out if she wants to still be with him or not (She's listed as "It's Complicated" on facebook with this guy).

The guys I know who put up with that "it's complicated" crap on facebook are complete AFCs, the worst of the worst, follow a girl around like a puppy dog kind of guys. Think about it. Would any of us put up with sh!t like that? Would you still follow around a girl who disrespected you like that?

On the one hand, all men are in competition for the hot women, but on the other hand, he is obviously an AFC, so there really is no competition. I can tell you right now that he will be all over her at that party. Just act mostly indifferent, maybe shoot her a flirty look or two but that's all. You can also use the 'you two make a cute couple' line, but don't give her any swordfight drama. He will bore her, you will make her wonder, then later after he's gone, she will hook up with you. You'll be breaking the poor afc bf's heart, but then again it is really him doing it to himself.

I think you may be on to something here. I looked at the type of stuff he was saying to her and he said things like "how's it going beautiful", "I miss you", etc. But then again I don't really know what their relationship was like.

One thing I forgot to point out is that the guy goes to a different college than me and the girl go to. So I'm not sure if they are in love and the distance is holding them back, or if she's just toying with him. My issue is that I refuse to be just a girl's "option". That makes me look inferior if she chooses the other guy.

 

[DJDamage]

Just cut through the bullsh1t and ask her out. I don't care if her ex is in her life and she fvcks him from time to time, this is not your concern.

 

[Don Juanabbe]

Okay, here's a quick synopsis: I met a girl at my college, she is pretty damn hot and about as cool of a girl as your ever going to meet. We have been talking, teasing back and forth, and for once the whole C+F thing is actually working for me. She told my friend that she "likes" me a few days ago. Here is the tricky part: Her "ex" is still in her life, and I guess she's still trying to figure out if she wants to still be with him or not (She's listed as "It's Complicated" on facebook with this guy).

Well we're having people over at our apartment tomorrow, then we are going to my friend's house party. Here's the kicker: She's bringing this guy with her! She is still flirting with me a lot though.

So what should I do? I think this girl is awesome, which scares me because I don't usually get this way around girls and I don't want to get the dreaded "oneitis". Should I just forget it instead of trying to "prove" myself to this girl?

Forget about it and pursue another woman who is single. In fact, do so at this party and guage her reaction. Sounds like you have poor odds if she's bringing the boyfriend over. Don't waste your time on maybes. He is most definately NOT her ex.

 

[Maximus Rex]

?. Why is this the only girl your focusing on? Whether it's Leykis, Louis and Copeland, Mystery, Mr. Fingers or Pook. They all agree on one point. YOU HAVE TO BE TRYING TO HOLLA AT MORE THAN ONE CHICK AT A TIME.

My guess is that you not trying to holla more than one chick because ypur worried about this one and her ex.

 

[Mad Manic]

You are always competing mate.

MM

 

[Production6257]

Well I just found out that this "ex" of hers that she is bringing to the party has cheated on her a few times, so I guess he isn't so AFC after all. If she wants a guy like that, then I guess it's not even worth it.

 

[reset]

There's no competition for you. If a girl sees it that way, then walk away and puruse other interests. She's not worth your time.

Now if you KNOW that she's into you, and you KNOW there's a chance she's just trying to make you jealous, ride it out, and she'll be yours. But if you get the feeling that she's trying to pit you against someone else, in my mind it's game over.

The less complicated the better.

If she starts yakin about her ex when she is talking to you. Just say: "I don't think this will work out between us. Give me a call sometime when your over your ex and ill see if i'm avaible." Then, smile and walk away. Your basicly nexting her by doing this but, it may show you have higher value than her.

Hopefully, some of this will help you.

You always come out on top with that mindset. I think girls know pretty early on if they want to be with you or not. It's a waste of time to stick around and hope to change her mind. It could work for you, but again, WHY PUT YOURSELF through that when there are unattached girls who would want you all for themselves, and who don't want anyone else but you?

That's more fun.