"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Is it possible that some guys will never get girls?

NewGuy72

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I don't know. I've recently taken a huge hit to my confidence and I believe that I'll never get a girl again (not even a very average girl). All the women I meet either LJBF me, lie to me, blow me off, or are just *****y to me. I've tried to apply the things I've learned on this site but have had no lasting results (had minimal results with one girl, but even she started treating me like ****). Approaching doesn't do much, I can easily get a girls number (all I usually have to do is ask) but that's all that happens. None of those numbers turns into dates. I eventually just delete the number.

So, I don't know. I don't think there's much else I can learn for this site, because none of it works for me. I guess I may just have to accept that I'm not the kind of guy that gets girls (or even one girl).

Anyway, later guys.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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DJDanny

Don Juan
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If you choose not to improve yourself then it is very possible. From your post you don't seem to do well on cold approaches, might I suggest social circles? If your numbers aren't turning into dates you're probably not building enough rapport before closing on the number.

When I first came to this site in May 05 I just turned 22 and I was as virgin as they come, hadn't even fooled around with a girl, my motivation was i had a shot with this extremely attractive chick but had no idea what to do and obviously she nexted me.

Anyways for 4 months I studied, got through the first few weeks of the bootcamp and started putting the tips into practice. October 05 met this chick and messed around with her a bit(BJ), that only encourage me more, in November I lost my V card and it only encouraged me more, by December I had girls offering me their number unprompted and fighting over me instead of me chasing them.

Then I met a wonderful girl who I settled down with, little did I know our relationship was doomed though, as i hadn't practiced enough for the principles of being a DJ to fully set in and reverted to a big time AFC with oneitis there wasn't a cure for.

I guess there are 3 things you can take from my story. Firstly, I was as raw as they come and yet it worked for me, and if it worked for me it will work for anyone.

Secondly, don't expect success overnight, being a DJ is developing inner game, you might be able to fake it a bit but it will take time, each success will breed more success down the line.

and finally, don't settle down to early til you are happy with who you are and you're not going to backslide from your hard earned changes, don't change yourself for anyone, if a woman doesn't like you for who you are, they certainly aren't going to like/respect you just because you try to be who they think they want you to be.

Good luck, there are days where you think it's not gonna work, but as you develop that inner game those thoughts will disappear and you'll realize you're closer to your goals then you thought.
 

thecurtainfalls

Senior Don Juan
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NewGuy, you'd do well to follow the advice that DJDanny just typed. It's obvious that he's no keyboard jockey and is speaking from real experience.

I too suggest you try to cut back the cold approaches. Cold approaches are a lower % game as far as getting a QUALITY phone number (i.e. the girl isn't giving you the number out of pity, to get you to go away, a fake #, etc) even for more experienced guys like myself. Sure, great things can and do come from cold approaches, but it's more of an advanced and high pressure situation for someone who is trying to break a cold streak. There's also much less room for error.

If I were in your shoes, I'd try and meet some new people whether it be at a bar, off facebook, through friends of friends... go into it with zero intentions of trying to find a girl to impale, rather just try and be more sociable in general. Then you will start meeting people who know other new people, and by being social you will eventually come into contact with girls that you would consider banging. At this point you'll have the advantage of the built-in social proof, even if it's as basic as just being introduced or being seen talking to someone that the girl is already comfortable with. This goes miles as far as eliminating any female paranoia about you being potentially creepy or unsafe. Never underestimate that a lot of times girls (ESPECIALLY cute ones) will have a biotch shield up because random dudes could be dangerous or weird. No offense, but you might not be doing an adequate job of eliminating that shield in your current cold approaches. Which is understandable, considering it's not necessarily the easiest task to make a complete stranger feel comfortable enough to let you into her life or give you, a random guy, her contact info. A social circle and a little bit of social proof (seriously, even just a little bit) will do MAGIC for you in eliminating this problem while you get your confidence/game up.

Besides that... just keep putting yourself into positions where you have a chance. Default towards action, make strides every day towards putting yourself in a better social situation. Like DJDanny said, this sh!t doesn't materialize overnight.

Remember even the best baseball players go through mad slumps... but you just gotta keep getting into the batter's box and at least seeing pitches, or you might as well hang up your cleats and give up.
 

moneyisking

Master Don Juan
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It's not an option. If you don't get a girl, then it's your fault. Your question is like asking a Jewish or Muslim what if God/Allah didn't exist. That question is not even an option. If it is a guy, the only option is getting a girl. Nothing else. Although some do take more time than the other.
 

PappyS

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Oct 17, 2009
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Easiest way for anyone to get a girl is to go to a developing country and try to get a girlfriend there. I've heard many stories of men who couldn't get any girls at home coming up with dimes overseas. Even if you can't get a girl you'll be able to get lots of *****s- probably for less than it costs to take a girl out on a date here or to buy nice clothes to attract women.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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NewGuy72

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fuzzx said:
You've been here less than a year!
I've been lurking here reading stuff since the start of the year (jan or feb, can't remember).

Anyway, I've tried to social circle game as well. That's actually what destroyed my confidence, all these girls that acted interested but would stand me up, etc. I don't know, I guess I expected some results, but since coming here I've only kissed 1 girl (out of the 2 dozen or so I pursued). I'm just a little sick of it, and tired of playing games with these girls. I think I just need a break.
 
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