is it okay to lie to sleep with a girl?

[raspliffarian]

so i picked up this hb8 chick on the street near my house... we hit it off quite well and as she was complaining about living with her parents, i joked that we should live together

long story short, she took it seriously and apparently fell in love with me immediately, so we've been seeing each other constantly the last 2 weeks and knocking boots considerably

she talks a lot about moving in together and i've been going along with it, planning where to live and talking about how much fun it will be... now she's really looking forward to it and says how much she trusts me and believes that i won't betray her

problem is... i'm starting to have doubts about living with her... i basically just said what i said as it was the easiest path to getting into her panties

so i have a few questions...

1. is it okay to lie and trick girls by messing with their emotions so you can get them into bed?

2. even if i have some misgivings, is it better to do the honourable thing, keep my word and move in with her and at least give it an honest shot... i mean, i like her but i still want to bang other chicks

3. if i decide not to move in with her, what's the least painful way (for her) to go about ending it and/or extricating myself from this situation?


i consider myself a good person and cutting bait at this point seems ruthless... but i feel like i'm going to need to override the basic instinct to have more women just to be with one and i don't know if it's worth it to change that much

 

[DMSR76]

LMFAO!!!

Either you have the strongest game ever, or you've bagged yourself a nutcase. No way in 'L should you take up residence with this woman. Period.

 

[5string]

LMFAO!!!

Either you have the strongest game ever, or you've bagged yourself a nutcase. No way in 'L should you take up residence with this woman. Period.

Listen to this guy ^^^^ Gauranteed nut case. Don't move in and don't get emotionally smitten with her. :nono:

 

[PokerInTheRear]

1. You shouldnt need to.
2. Dear god no.
3. Abort now.

She is nuts.

 

[squirrels]

Hahaha really??

Tell her you were "just kidding" about moving in.

You really rode the lie too far...and now you're paying for it. If it was just to sleep with her the first time, that's relatively harmless. Although I don't operate that way myself, I can understand it. But to continue to allow her to get her hopes up just so you could keep banging her...well, you get what you have coming. Now you have a full-on nutjob (because that's the only kind of girl who would move in with you after 2 weeks of knowing you) expecting you to be serious with her.

Good luck.

 

[betheman]

This could be messy :kick:

 

[DropZone3]

My personal opinion is no! You should not have to lie to get her in bed.

In the end, only you can decide what is okay for you.

Good luck.

 

[Colossus]

You might want to reconsider your definition of "honor"...and start by not lying to get in a girl's pants.

 

[Zarky]

Keep in mind the OP's girl is 13 years old

 

[runner83]

1. is it okay to lie and trick girls by messing with their emotions so you can get them into bed?

Flat out lying no, but skirting the issue is different.

If you only joked about it, and she took it seriously, then how are you to blame for that?

There is a difference between flat out lying and her misreading the situation. Don't make the mistake of apologising to her for her misread of the situation.

2. even if i have some misgivings, is it better to do the honourable thing, keep my word and move in with her and at least give it an honest shot... i mean, i like her but i still want to bang other chicks

2 - NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!! After 2 weeks? FVCK NO!

This is why:

Iron Rule of Tomassi #4

NEVER under any circumstance live with a woman you aren't married to or are not planning to marry in within 6 months.

You are utterly powerless in this situation. NEVER buy a home with a girlfriend, NEVER sign a rental lease with a girlfriend. NEVER agree to move into her home and absolutely NEVER move a woman into your own established living arrangement. I'm adamantly opposed to the "shacking up" dynamic, it is a trap that far too many men allow themselves to fall into. My fervor agianst this isn't based on some moral issue, it it simple pragmatism. If you live with a woman you may as well be married because upon doing so every liability and accountability of marriage is then in effect. You not only lose any freedom of annonymity you commit to, legally, being responsible for the continuation of your living arrangements regardless of how your relationship decays.

I should also emphasize the point that when you commit (and it is a financial committment) to cohabiting with a GF you will notice a marked decrease in her sexual availability and desire, trust me on this. All of that competitive anxiety and it's resulting sexual tension that made your single sex life so great is removed from her shoulders and she can comfortably relax in the knowledge that she is your ONLY source of sexual intimacy. Putting your name on that lease with her (even if it's just your name) is akin to signing an insurance polcy for her - "I the undersigned promise not to ƒuck any woman but this girl for a one year term." She thinks, "if he wasn't serious about me, he wouldn't have signed the lease." Now all of that impetus and energy that made having marathon sex with you an outright necessity is relaxed. She controls the frame and she's got it in writing that it is for at least a year.

Just don't do it. Relationships last best when you spin more plates or at the very least keep each other at arm's distance.

Don't buy into the feminine convention that by banging a girl for any length of time, you are obligated to have a relationship with her. She was a willing party as well.

3. if i decide not to move in with her, what's the least painful way (for her) to go about ending it and/or extricating myself from this situation?

Don't move in with her. Like Squirrels said, tell her you were only joking about moving in together.

And dependent on her behaviour after this, either:

* If her attraction is still there and she is not revealed to be a complete nutcase (10% chance), keep banging her and also see other girls

* If she turns out to be a nutcase (90% chance), EJECT!