"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Is it even possible to have fun with the mall?

ElStud

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Alright, well I'm trying to work on having more fun with approaching and not seeing it as work, but it seems almost impossible to do at the mall. Most of the time you're just walking around and when you do occassionally see a good looking girl, you seize up because you know she'll be able to detect you're not having fun and therefore will reject you. And yeah, overall the mall itself is just not fun and therefore it's hard to really be in a state of having fun when you're approaching a girl. Most of the time you're walking around looking for girls for hours, which is tiring. The only interesting thing that happened to me today, was I saw a few of my friends who graduated. They asked me if I saw any girls and I was like "Nah man, haven't seen anything I liked yet. I haven't seen any good looking chicks yet, zero." and they started joking about how I have high standards. I tell them I come here because there aren't any girls where I live and they laugh. I also saw this other friend of mine who graduated and told me he's working at Disney now. But approach wise, NOTHING, because I know the girl will reject me if she knows I'm not having fun. I try to tell myself the mall is fun, but that doesn't work either.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Yapper

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First of all, your thinking is self-defeating. What is this odd concept of "having fun" you seem to have? Are you walking around depressed?

Second, make up your mind. Are you not seeing girls you like, or are you seeing them and just not approaching because you're not "having fun"? If it's the latter then stop making up dumb excuses and spit your game, fool.
 

ElStud

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Yapper said:
First of all, your thinking is self-defeating and not accurate at all. What is this odd concept of "having fun" you seem to have? Are you walking around depressed?

Second, make up your mind. Are you not seeing girls you like, or are you seeing them and just not approaching because you're not "having fun"? If it's the latter then stop making up dumb excuses and spit your game, fool.
Dude, if they can sense I'm not having fun they'll reject me. I try to go to the mall and have fun with it, but eventually all the walking around and finding few girls gets to me and it becomes more work than fun. Most of the time I just don't see girls I like and when I do, I don't feel like chasing her or I just won't approach her because I'm afraid of being rejected. Like there was this one girl who worked at Sephora I wanted to approach, but I seized up because I was too worried about what to say or if she would even be interested.
 

bachelor

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I mean the mall is alright but there are better places to meet women... Bookstores, Coffee shops, the Beach, online... Yeah the mall sucks lol
 

Yapper

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ElStud said:
Dude, if they can sense I'm not having fun they'll reject me. I try to go to the mall and have fun with it, but eventually all the walking around and finding few girls gets to me and it becomes more work than fun. Most of the time I just don't see girls I like and when I do, I don't feel like chasing her or I just won't approach her because I'm afraid of being rejected. Like there was this one girl who worked at Sephora I wanted to approach, but I seized up because I was too worried about what to say or if she would even be interested.
If they can sense you're a scared little p*ssy they'll reject you.

Sounds like you have the same approach anxiety everyone struggles with. I'm telling you all you're doing is making excuses.

Just invade the b_tch's space, grab her attention, and talk like normal. Take her off the pedestal you've placed her on by looks alone. Chances are she's not sh*t. You are sizing her up, you want to find out if she's worth your time. If she opens her mouth and what comes out sounds like Courtney Love on acid, or you get the feeling she's not digging, then you eject. You didn't get "rejected".
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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