Is it cool to take a break?

[Delly2000]

After my last break up I think its a good time to take a break. The last girl I dated was attractive but it ended up going bad. I am not saying that my weight was the reason but I am sure it was possibly a factor when she compared me to her other suitors who I am sure were ripped no doubt.

Now I am thinking it doesn't really make sense trying to hustle pretty girls because I wouldnt pass the physical attraction test. I am just being real. Its reality.

I remmember in the past when I was overweight. I didnt get any chicks. I lost the weight in Uni and chicks were becoming easy to pick up. A bit after college after sitting behind a desk for several years and living with my parents I gained the weight back..plus drinking (these are excuses I know).

So now I am on my weight loss plan. Got a new job. Moving into a new apartment. I figure it doesn't make sense trying to talk to the girls I am really attracted too because it would be a waste of time because they will just play games with me because they aren't really attracted and see themselves as being of higher value.

Any thoughts?

 

[georgie24]

of course!!!!!!

think of all the bonehead mistake you make when your exausted, if your looking for LTR stay focused more then ever !

Just do some reflection IMO!

g24 - slowly rebuilding

 

[grayclif]

Delly,
I dont necessarily believe you should give up on dating while you are trying to improve yourself. Instead of approaching 7 and 8's approach 5 and 6's until your game tightens. Whatever you do just dont get hung up on any one in particular for the time being. You are 30, great job, your own place everything looks bright for you. If you have lost the weight before you can do it again. DHV by being consistent with your exercise regimen and what eat.

Oftentimes when folks get out of a relationship they want to hurry up and get right back into another one. Consider your breakup a blessing and really enjoy your 30's.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Delly,
I think you are over reacting....sure lose weight,but to a great degree I am sure your behaviour elicits the anticipated response...just keep trying,you will find someone...Promise.

 

[squirrels]

If you want to take a break, take a break. No one's forcing you to go out and date.

But if you meet a girl and decide you want to see her intimately, don't eliminate the possibility.

For some reason, people these days love to draw up limitations and boundaries for themselves to justify inaction. You do what YOU feel is right. If you think it's the right time to take some time off from dating, you do it.

 

[georgie24]

somewhere i had gotten burned out on DJing and missed warning signs of my last relationship wich was a BPD, had all bases covered carrer, clothes, LIIFESTYLE, stayed out too long, banged lots of chicks, mentally got worn out and missed red flags.

take a break

 

[Solomon]

I can relate to the OP, I'm in a somewhat similar situation (lost weight, put it back on)

OP right now I'm focused on getting three areas of my life handled before I go back hard in the "dating scene"

1. Get a car
2. save some $$$
3. focus on my mental&spiritual health plus Lose weight

If i meet some cool chicks fine but going out to the field for me is not gonna be a priority what so ever for the rest of the year

 

[iqqi]

Sometimes I think it is important to take a break.

I believe there were some good threads on here awhile ago, and maybe even a Pook thread, that said when a man is with a woman, he ceases to grow as a man. It is when he is alone that he grows as an individual.

 

[Sue Madre]

.....

 

[Delly2000]

I think you guys are right.

I just think that by spending a lot of mental energy trying to get a woman saps away from you focusing that energy on reaching your full potential.

I think I know what I want froma woman. Someone attractive as the last girl i dated but with Integrity and a good attitude. I am not going to lie...I enjoyed the way I felt with her until it went bad.

Also I have had my share of trying to woo a girl over a period of months just to have her go ahead and give it up to some jerk or thug just because he was good looking but practically an empty suit. But I dont really want to go into that...just the reality factor at work. No resentment here...just an observation.

About dating 5 and 6's. I am not sure about that. I mean if an 8, 9 or 10 sees you walking around with them she gonna put you in a particular category and you wouldnt have a chance with her. Losely speaking.

Yeah I saw the book of Pook and read it. Which is probably another reason why I find it a good time to take this route. Doing the same thing over again and wanting different results is insanity as they say.

 

[iqqi]

Also, when you are focused on YOU, and getting things to fall into line in your own life, realizing accomplishments, you'll find that women will gravitate to you. Usually ones that are more compatible with you.