"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Is being called "love" the kiss of death when it comes to LJBF

PlayToWin

Don Juan
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Basically long story short. There is this HB7 I work with, and she initially showed no signs of attraction, well when we went to happy hour one time which she invited me to, she was introducing me to all of her friends and bragging about me and saying how cool I was. I didn't think to much of it since she never previously showed IOI's really at work. I drank a little to much and she drove me home alone, and because I was a drunk and stupid I didn't try to invite her in or anything.

2 weeks later we were at happy hour and she got really drunk and starting touching and flirting with me and pulling my ear and playing around and teasing. She even ran up to me at one point and kissed me on the checks a few times real quick. It caught me so off guard and I wasn't even talking to her at that time that I didn't even know how to respond before she ran off.

So today at work she would be like "oh excuse me, love." "Or oh watch out my love". I know obviously its just an affectionate term. If we had already slept together then it wouldn't be an issue. But since we havn't I am wondering if this is the kiss of death towards the friend zone. Showing that she is that comfortable to be calling and referring to me that way.

Keep in mind she has invited me out already to the next happy hour, so regardless I am going all out, and seeing how far I can push the playful kissing thing. Basically what is everybody's opinion on this. Keep in mind we are both of college age and have only worked together for about a month or two, and this is just a college job so I am not worried about workplace drama.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
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Are you Australians or UKers?

If so that is pretty much a standard term of endearment/friendship in those countries to my knowledge but I wouldn't consider it as meaning you've been friendzoned.

From the sounds of your story it seems to me you are still in the game.

The sooner you make your move on her the better to find out where you stand for sure.
 

PlayToWin

Don Juan
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Nope strangely enough, we are both from the US, and I have never been referred to as "Love" before, thats what made me question it.

I am at the point in my DJ transition, where I am basically gonna pursue any somewhat serious IOI's to the max, until basically they say "No". Mainly because my biggest problem in the past(and still is to some degree) is isolating and escalating or just waiting too long to do so and missing oppurtunities.

Thanks for the opinion KontrollerX though, you always seem to give me or others good advice and generally have very interesting posts.
 

Igetit!

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This is a tough one.But if I were to take a guess,yeah,I would say you"re probably in the friendzone.For some reason,I get the feeling that if you were to try to pursue something with her,all of the sudden the "love"comments",the inviting you out,all the bragging about you to her friends would suddenly dry up.Hey,I don`t know everything,but something just doesn`t seem right.Talking to a girl and having her be shy,that`s normal.Her being cold sometimes,that`s normal.Being stuck up,normal.Playing hard to get for a little while then finally giving in,normal.
Look,my personal belief about women is this:You have to put something in to get something out.If you had approached her first,then she did all these things,ok.I can see that.A woman is like a coke machine.This is how a coke machine works.You put your money in,push the button,then a coke comes out.That`s normal.But if all of the sudden cokes just start coming out of the machine,one after another,without you putting any money in the machine,something`s wrong.I know it might seem cool to have all these cokes just flyin out without any effort on your part,but trust me,something`s not right.Likewise,it may seem cool to have all these supposed "IOIs"coming from this girl without any effort on your part,but hey,something just doesn`t feel right.
 
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