Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Is anybody here actually happier when in a serious relationship vs being single?

A

AJ84

Guest
And that is exactly the point. "The guys compromise themselves and sacrifice for a relationship" that is the equivalent of a woman getting fat or not giving up sex. If the partner is no longer the person you tell in love with, why would anyone stick around?

As men, we stick around because we feel that is the right thing to do. Unfortunately,It is the way we are biologically programmed which is to have honor or be a man of our word. Women are not programmed to behave this way, they haven't been in the 1950s and they aren't now. The difference now is that divorce and separation are not as forbidden as it once was and a woman is fully capable of supporting herself.
women can lie and manipulate with the best of them but to imply that men are biologically programmed to have honour and stick around because it's the right thing to do? Common topics on this whole site are about nexting, cheating, lying and manipulating, and there is a mile long thread on not sticking around. How many times are men advised to dump her if she does one little thing that he doesn't like? Come on now. I'm not dissing those themes but they are very common and supported on this site which vastly contradicts your last paragraph.
 

wbeatty

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You're only happier in a relationship than single if you don't have game or if the woman you are with is so attractive and versatile in her kinks that you never get bored of her.
 
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ubercat

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That's ridiculous. Plenty of the senior guys on the site are in ltrs. Are you seriously suggesting they don't have game?

If you've done a proper job of screening you should have one of those rare woman who is capable of growing with you. Believe me after you've been in the game for a few decades sex with random strangers can get boring too.
 

handle

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Yeah, perfectly happy in a ltr.

Stability is great, especially if you have other things you want to do with your life (read the classics, start a business, go back to school, etc). Believe it or not, the kind of support you get from a GOOD female partner is not comparable to having some close male friends and a handful of girls you screw around with.

This all, of course, depends on where you're at in life and what your priorities are.
 

Von

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The only person who can make you happy .... is you!

You can share this happiness with someone... it's called LTR...

When you are in LTR, you wanna have someone who send you back this happiness in her own way.

Both being happy together, building on and with each other.

Women will Mirror you..., so the quality of the girl will be a indication of what you are inside at the most subconscious level.

We all make mistakes, errors etc... nothing is perfect... even the perfect girl could likely not satisfy you ... because : She ain't what you look for or want..

Alot of girls who were hurt use this quote : ''Better be alone than badly accompanied''... no matter where the quote came from and the reasons she post it....

The quote hold truth even for guys.

If you are with a nasty girl or you a needy without confidence guy... you will be miserable in a LTR....

Outside validation is something I love, something I want.... but I don't seek it to ''fill what's inside''... if you looking for a girl to ''fill you''... you are in for a ride... a real twisted ride.

Happiness is interiorized and than exteriorized.... the women you LTR should complete you... not ''make - fill'' you.

After my first LTR of 5 years.... I was the happiest man SINGLE!

Now, I am in a LTR of 7 months with a super-conservative and religious girl.... she quite an improvement of all my past girls in terms of ''look - intellect - emotional stability - complimentary nature''.... its not always easy because her belief and behaviour sometimes make me feel its ''not a real relationship''... but I've noticed how the girl I picked now is a reflection of me...

So it tells me: I am still afraid of some deep commitment, I am looking for ''spirituality'' but my inner core and my confidence and inner happiness is MUCH BETTER than 7 years ago... I am A BETTER MAN.

And I AM in CONTROL of my LIFE.

So the LTR might go south, might progress... but I know its because I WANT IT... not a NEED.... i'll not drag it and be miserable like I was in my past.

I am no DJ, not perfect, not great with emotional control etc... but I am rational and kind... and I give my 100% with what I have. I was always told ''I am emotionally unavailable''

It's clear for me the women are not a goal... they are a EFFECT (A SIDE EFFECT - REWARD) of my goal of building my life... being a ''perfect man'' and ''a great business owner'' who take care of the people he loves.

If you are not happy alone ... you have issues
If you are only happy in LTR... you have issues.
If you are happy alone... that's great
If you are happy alone and happier in a LTR... means you found a great woman
If you have love for yourself... you can share that love.... if you don't ... than you have nothing to offer...and the woman will feel pressure in filling your ''void'' (it will **** her up)

I said I am happy with my current LTR (with a emotional girl, who rationalize, tends to do what she says, and has daddy issues, who's stubborn, solid, and accept emotionnally distant guys, who believe Jesus is number 1 love).... I am but we starting to have issues... due to her belief... I don't feel we have it real in actions. For her marriage is the key to having it ''real'' (living together, sex, etc. etc..).... but how can I commit if I don't have the girl true core... and it's ****ing her up inside and her family ain't helping because they know nothing and have no experience of what she's living because they so much in a shelter. She's feeling the pressure of leaving the shelter, I love her even if imperfect... all I can do is stand solid and strong and move forward ''BE A MAN who HOLD ON HIS WORDS BY ACTION''.... but in the past 3 weeks, every encounter had a ''what's a relationship''..... PS: I am aware maybe I took a religious girl cause I know in religion she will find emotions I can't give her (due to being me = unavailable or distant) lol. I am solid and frank to her

I straight told her: I am starting to wonder to breakup or atleast meet other girls because I want to build something... and followed up with : You wanna get married for your ''god' but you aint giving me any reasons to marry you.

So I can have these talks because I am solid inside... last night she mentioned: ''than do you wanna breakup or see other girls''... I did choke on that... you know why? I have no other plates or strong options...

I am a babe magnet everywhere I go... but with my business, studies, gym etc... the dance school is the only place I have to pick up chicks (5 of them offered dates)... I would say Yes.... if my LTR didn't come from the same dance school :p.

For those who did the long READ... Thank you.

In short: The only happiness you can find is within YOU, building FRAME, LEARN, EXPERIENCE... apply your car sales techniques to dating. Women mirror you, they will pick all your issues subconstiously. That's why its important to be a better man.... a better man is also someone who has more than a ''sleeping with girl goal''...

People who obsess with girls... have issues... they have nothing going on in their lives and they want women to save them.

If you want to be happy: Be Happy with yourself and accept yourself.

It's alright to be Alone, its alright to have plates, alright to be in a LTR.... but it's must be BECAUSE YOU WANT IT..... forget the NEED or FORCED upon you... its a WANT first.

You want a LTR? Good, read DJ bible, talk to the girls even if they don't follow your checklist, have fun, allow them to connect with you
 

Mr Wright

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I see it this way, I've had the best days of my life when I was with my ex. By that I mean individual days which I carry with me and appreciate, for me I can't recreate those experiences when I'm single. However, as an overall trend I am much happier when I'm single, there's less emotional fluctuation, no one to argue with and I get to do things on my terms. I took the decision to be single and it was a very conscious decision and now I have what I call mini relationships which can be as short as a weekend where I get that craving for affection out of my system, then I can get on with my life.

Gun to my head and I had to pick one life forever, I'd stay single. I'm young and I've never really settled in relationships.
 
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