Is a girl crossing her arms always a bad sign?

[mahon83050]

I went out on a first date with this girl whom a friends sister hooked me up with. The date went ok, but I noticed every 5 minutes or so, she would cross her arms for about 30 seconds to a minute each. I have always read that is a negative vibe and a red flag. Other times, it seemed like the signals were good because she was figiditing with things while at the table. However, is a girl crossing her arms always negative towards the other person? I mean, it could of meant....maybe she was a little shy and felt uncomfortable at times or it could of mean...."I am not attracted to you. Any input would help.

 

[becker]

I think the crossed arms thing is not a very good measure of IL. Too ambiguous and arbitrary if you ask me. I cross my arms all the time in the presence of girls that I've very interested in. Sometimes it's just a more comfortable way to put your arms instead of having your arms hang at your sides. Don't read into it too much.

I think there are better gauges of IL, such as eye contact from a somewhat outgoing girl (shy girls are sort of an exception here), kino from an outgoing girl (same exception of shy girls), outgoing girl that wants to hang around you, accepting dates, etc.

Most of all though, look at her actions as a whole and try not to narrow it down to one action and micro-analyze it.

 

[mahon83050]

Thanks dude, besides it was the first date...I am sure there are alot of people who did not have ultra smooth first dates and they are married today.

 

[Paid Laid & Made]

Not always a bad sign. But it sux, only had that happen once to me and I know you are like WTF and it bothers you.

 

[becker]

I cross my arms whenever I'm cold, so like I said, I wouldn't look into it too much.

 

[DEKKA]

ive read lots of books and talked to people about body language and this is what i've learned. body language usually comes in "clusters". in other words its very rarely just one hint that you are being given if a girl isn't interested. the same goes for when she is interested. you have to look for a combination of a few elements of body language, eye contact, positioning, etc.

i recommend reading body language secrets by this guy steele... i forget what his first name is but i think you can get it on amazon.

im at the point where i don't really conciously pay attention to individual signs because eventually you just kind of develop a sense of what shes trying to say. once you are attuned to whats going on you'll almost laugh to yourself when you see blatent signs of interest or negativity.

anyways like they said, i wouldn't take one thing too seriously... you can usually tell by the whole picture you're being given whether shes game or not.

good luck with that playa.

 

[Porky]

Haha. Yeah, lots of people have bad first dates and are married. My parents, for instance. My mom threw up on their first date...luckily not on my dad.

 

[diplomatic_lies]

Some people cross their arms because they have nothing to do with them. Offer her something to hold (ie. your penis)


This is more of a social/career thing, but when sombody crosses their arms it makes them more hostile. Offering them something (ie. a drink, cigarette, book, etc) will unconsciously open them more, and they will be happier about negotiations. Crossing arms has an unconscious effect on your mind, making you feel safer from the OTHER person (which also makes them the "enemy" in their mind, and not an "ally").