"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Intorversion - (SERIOUSLY) help me make it a plus to get women!
- Thread starter Babnik
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
sexxyback said:you don't have to explain yourself to anyone, let alone any drunk biatches.
Thats very wrong attitude because sometimes they try to start a conversation!!!!
Sometimes they give me a tone of "Why aren't you with the rest? Retarded?" and then I ignore them but sometimes they use it to get close to me.
Explaining what introvert means is just boring and not a good opening conversations.
I can't think of anything to say besides "I just like to chill by myself sometimes"
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
TillTheEndOfTime
Master Don Juan
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- Dec 4, 2004
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1) I'm tiredsexxyback said:'letting my mind rest a bit' won't work. sounds like you have psych problems or something.
2) Not feeling well
3) I have a headache
4) Pretend like you're fumbling through your pcokets and say something like "I'm trying to remember where I put my _____" (i.e. mp3 player, ID, usb key/memory stick, camera, etc)
How about one of those for deflecting that question?
Well, help me out then. How about "Waiting for you to stop by and talk to me"sexxyback said:'letting my mind rest a bit' won't work. sounds like you have psych problems or something.
TillTheEndOfTime said:1) I'm tired
2) Not feeling well
3) I have a headache
4) Pretend like you're fumbling through your pcokets and say something like "I'm trying to remember where I put my _____" (i.e. mp3 player, ID, usb key/memory stick, camera, etc)
How about one of those for deflecting that question?
Very negative... except for the last one. But when I sit down, I sit down for 15 minutes or so.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
THE_ADDMAN
Master Don Juan
an Introverts tendency to think BEFORE they talk can be a great advantage. go for quality, not quantity of words. and on a date, do something that doesnt require much talking, like an action date, movie, or games.
On a personal note, I AM working at becoming more social, but I also enjoy quiet time alone to reflect and unwind
Still concerned about the reply to "Why are you alone? Why are you sad?"
What do I tell my FRIENDS? I would be in a bar and all of a sudden "Dude, are you OK man? You don't look like you are having a good time!" and I am!
For the same token, Extroverts have to work harder when dealing with their partner in a one-on-one situation as every intimate relationship must have.Babnik said:This is perfect what you said. Introverts have to WORK at social events, while extroverts ENJOY social events and get energy boost from them. Introverts use up their powers during social events.
Here is the thing...an "extrovert" type personallity might get you noticed in a social event by some women. But an "introverted" type personallity (please, do NOT confuse this with shyness) might get that same woman, once she gets to know you, interested for a longer period of time.
My point is...BOTH have trade off. One is not better than the other.
You don't have to explain anything about your personallity.Babnik said:Thats very wrong attitude because sometimes they try to start a conversation!!!!
Sometimes they give me a tone of "Why aren't you with the rest? Retarded?" and then I ignore them but sometimes they use it to get close to me.
Explaining what introvert means is just boring and not a good opening conversations.
I can't think of anything to say besides "I just like to chill by myself sometimes"
Simply work on your mannerisms...so they look confident and collective and calm.
Bad approach. Sending negativity is not a good approach.TillTheEndOfTime said:1) I'm tired
2) Not feeling well
3) I have a headache
4) Pretend like you're fumbling through your pcokets and say something like "I'm trying to remember where I put my _____" (i.e. mp3 player, ID, usb key/memory stick, camera, etc)
How about one of those for deflecting that question?
What about? "Hey, I'm good..." and then continue with the conversation.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
TillTheEndOfTime
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Dec 4, 2004
- Messages
- 1,930
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- 59
If this situation is a constant problem, I don't think introversion is even the real issue here. It is either one of two things: your friends are "too social" or you're a little anti-social at times. Personally, I am laid back, but still social. So if my friends were party animals, there would be a clash because I just can't be as enthusiastic as a party animal, it is not in me to do it.Babnik said:bump!
Still concerned about the reply to "Why are you alone? Why are you sad?"
What do I tell my FRIENDS? I would be in a bar and all of a sudden "Dude, are you OK man? You don't look like you are having a good time!" and I am!
Something doesn't seem right if your friends have to ask you that question so much. Can you give more details/examples?
Babnik said:bump!
Still concerned about the reply to "Why are you alone? Why are you sad?"
What do I tell my FRIENDS? I would be in a bar and all of a sudden "Dude, are you OK man? You don't look like you are having a good time!" and I am!
Don't worry about explaining yourself...as you are now sounding VERY insecure.
The fact that women are approaching you when you are "alone" is a PLUS. Do you realize how many of these guys that post in here would give ANYTHING to have at least one woman approach them in life?
And you are concerned about some canned answer to your "predicament"? This is unreal!
What about simply working on your mannerisms and once that one or two women approach you (note: from a group, now they are only one or two which put them in YOUR element...YOUR advantage), then instead of giving them an explanation or some cheesy canned answer...why not simply smile and change to topic?
Woman: "Why are you doing alone? You look so sad?"
You: {Smile} "Hi. Sad?" {laugh} "Hey, ain't you a friend of ____?" (or "Don't you work with/in ____?")
If you smile when a woman approach you...you can rest assure that they will NEVER ask you if you are sad. If you stand with confidence...you can rest assure that if the approach you is because they want to strike conversation with you.
I mean...how many time a man approaches a woman as ask her the same STUPID question? "Why are you so alone?" or "Why are you so sad?"
TillTheEndOfTime said:If this situation is a constant problem, I don't think introversion is even the real issue here. It is either one of two things: your friends are "too social" or you're a little anti-social at times. Personally, I am laid back, but still social. So if my friends were party animals, there would be a clash because I just can't be as enthusiastic as a party animal, it is not in me to do it.
Something doesn't seem right if your friends have to ask you that question so much. Can you give more details/examples?
I agree.
And it might have to be with body language. That's my guess. A body language of a young man going through depression.
Using movies as an example. James Bond sits in a Casino. Does he look like a person that is talking to a bunch of people, etc? Nope. Typically the "bad" guy is the extroverted one. James Bond tends to be quite and observant and low profile and calm and collective. He draws attention, because his body language (and looks) as well as his masculinity brings that on him.
Now...he is an introverted. But he is a very good one as he is great seducing women in a ONE-on-ONE situation.
selfmademob
Banned
TillTheEndOfTime said:If this situation is a constant problem, I don't think introversion is even the real issue here. It is either one of two things: your friends are "too social" or you're a little anti-social at times. Personally, I am laid back, but still social. So if my friends were party animals, there would be a clash because I just can't be as enthusiastic as a party animal, it is not in me to do it.
Something doesn't seem right if your friends have to ask you that question so much. Can you give more details/examples?
We are in a bar. I start talking for myabe 15 minutes, getting to knew guys and girls, interesting conversation. Someone else picks up the conversations an dI stand listening and slowly enter my own thoughts and brain and sit down and just think about things. Because I am not standing like the rest and talking NON-STOP - I look a bit out of place and sad (just neutral facial expression).
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.