"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Intimidating

Confident1

Don Juan
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Ok, I am an *******. I made a resolution to be a master of C&F almost 2 years ago, I think I am finally coming around. As one guy here said: you need to have the biggest balls around. At the risk of sounding like a tool, I do. I say and do what I feel, I lost that barrier between what I think and what I say. It has become expected of me. <<<<<<Yea sorry, don't know how else to say it, I am also really blunt.

Ok, well there are atleast two girls that are interested in me. The less confident one was talking to a lady-friend of mine (always have a hot lady-friend, they will be there for you no matter what, I learned that here, its great. Just don't flirt with them, they are supposed to be guys in your mind) and she was talking about me. Apparently I am a very intimidating person...

This has actually happened to me a couple of times. I am not sure what to do. I mean I am one of the best ball busters around, but I am not a straight out *******, everything I say is either spun with humor, or a double entendriee (sp???) or something, its never down right: your ugly get away. Its more like a patronizing: Oh, Laura, my dear, you look beautiful tonight, too...it really is a shame I am too good for you.

Thanks for anything you can tell me.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Damian

Senior Don Juan
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Nov 13, 2005
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Well, you don't have a question...so i really don't know what to address. On the other hand, I've seen this issue a lot. People try to get into C&F and start looking like total @sses. Usually, people just go overboard on the ****y part and start to lose it on the FUNNY part. A key element of using C&F is the F part. When you say something, it should almost always be replied by a laugh or giggle. Being ****y is easy. But being comedic at the same time is the hard part. That's why we don't have a **** Central channel on cable TV.

-Damian
 

Confident1

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I don't really, my question is how to avoid this?

Don't get me wrong, I have the "F" part down fairly well, the C part is actually the hard part for me. I can always make people laugh. It just seems that I intimidate certain girls. The "vixens" as my friends call them, flock to me. You know, the hot firecrackers that know they are hot and are secure in themselves. That come up to you in bars (I live in Nola) and flirt and things like that.
But, I don't like that type, I prefer the cute girls girls, that are cool and chill... any advice on how to make myself look more... "approachable"??
 
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