"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Interesting chat with my semi-regular, quasi sort-of girlfriend.

Y

Yuma

Don Juan
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I've known the girl for a few years. She's one of the security personelle at the school where I'm an RA. I work graveyard and she works morning, so she brings me coffee and something to eat usually; she's very sweet. We'd been flirting since I was a student there, but since I got hired full time, we've been fvcking on the regular and dating. Thing is, as much as I like the coffee in the morning and the dinner being made at night, she's swung practically into 'wife mode'. She's 26, I'm 23, and neither of us should be at that stage any time soon. Y'know what I mean?

So, we talk last night about exclusivity and commitment and I let her know that I have no expectations about becoming a legit bf/gf couple, or marriage down the road or kids or any of that. NOTE that the only reason I brought this up is because she's talked about it before. It's not like I just threw it out there; that'd be nuts.

Anyway, she was... cool with it. She said that maybe she thinks she could change my mind one day, but for now she understands and just wants me to be happy. She's a cool girl. Even if the sex is a little uninteresting at times, and she can be a bit naive, she's cool.


The point of the thread is this, though - how do you guys feel about long term commitment at a young age? Even, ever? And would you date a girl who wants that, if you make it clear you have no intentions of settling down?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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5

5string

Master Don Juan
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Doesnt matter what we think. You said you did not want the bf/gf thing and made it clear to her. She'll either accept it, or she won't. I think you played this well. I got married at 27. That was too young. At least I think so looking back on it.
 
S

sodbuster

Master Don Juan
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The advantage to marrying young is you have a chance at finding a good one. The disadvantages-you may not know a good one or you may change and grow apart. At my age, the divorced women are running around with kids and attitude. The"good ones" stay married-but they are ALL crazy.

IF you are thinking about marriage and kids-pick her like you would a brood mare. Good form,good temperament,good intelligence,good genetics.
 
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