Insecurity is a huge advantage.

[Serenity]

As paradoxical as this may seem insecurity can be extremely helpful in getting true unshakable confidence. Because pretending you know sh!t builds your ego, and in my experience everything you think can be argued against. Being egoless is the ultimate goal of being a DJ.

Reaching the ideal state of mind (unbeatable inner game) requires you to let go of everything, when you don't need anything it will come to you. I'm not telling you to quit your jobs or dump your friends, I'm telling you not to be attached to it. To achieve this you must beat down everything you believe by using arguments from the other side, and then realize that neither are permanently true or false. Everything you put into words are beliefs, and even what I'm saying now can be argued against.

Beliefs about yourself also need to be let go of, even the positive ones. If you think you're smart and constantly tell yourself this you will build a self-image. And in the times you actually do something stupid you will deny it because you believe you're smart.

Insecurity is good because you're closer to being egoless than if you think you've figured it all out. Extreme insecurity can instantly become supreme confidence if you accept insecurity. The distinction is that with insecurity you analyze first and then make a choice, but with confidence you choose first and analyze later.

Let's take a practical example. A woman looks at you and you notice it, you want to approach yet you can't do it. That's insecurity, you now have a choice between doing it or not. The real choice is between going for what you want or denying what you want. Insecurity is trying to rationally figure out the choice, which is a very very ineffective process and thus you freeze. Confidence is to simply recognize it as a choice and go for what you actually want thus you take immediate action.

By challenging everything you think you will find the truth somewhere in between the extremes. Read philosophy, religion, psychology, sociology, fiction etc. and really try to understand and make sense of it. Don't simply believe it or not. Those are also great sources of knowledge that explain in various ways how the human mind works.

Don't judge what I say as true or not, the phenomenon I'm trying to explain can never be clearly explained. Language can be used to make others understand our experiences, but it can't explain the experience of experience. :crackup:

 

[Dgwizdal]

How does one develop a personality, let alone a spine, and even more so a solid gut feeling with your train of thought if you're constantly questioning yourself. You sure is f*ck aren't going to get anywhere with women.

 

[Serenity]

Questioning yourself isn't wrong in itself. You just need to know when not to do it and when to do it, and to find that out you have to honestly ask yourself. I'm not saying it's a quick and easy fix, for the delusional facing truth it's the hardest thing you can do.

I reached a pit of extreme anxiety before my thoughts simply shut down and I went from inaction to action. Becoming confident, fearless, having complete integrity and nothing can trigger me to become reactive not even in my mind.

The nature of true confidence is a paradox. Getting there is not about telling yourself what you are and what you don't are, as can be understood by developing a personality (from a pessimistic point of view). It's about reducing what you believe to the point where you don't believe anything, then accept that you don't know sh!t. You lose self-awareness and you get sh!t done as if you were on autopilot and find pretty much everything amusing. You then act purely on gut feeling.

My point is that you have to look into yourself to figure yourself out so you can get over yourself and focus on what you want to do. This is all extremely complicated. I don't need anyone to agree, just understand.