Inner Game......What??

[SeymourCake]

Can you recommend some good books?

The Dhammapada (sayings of the Buddha)

Mindfulness in Plain English (free e-book)
http://www.urbandharma.org/udharma4/mpe.html

If you're interested in Buddhism, I would also look into Stoicsm. Read "The Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius (stoicism from an emperor's point of view) and Enchiridion by Epictetus (stoicism from a slave's point of view).

The Meditations: http://classics.mit.edu/Antoninus/meditations.html
The Enchridions: http://classics.mit.edu/Epictetus/epicench.html

 

[yungballa]

The mind is everything. It all boils down to how you see yourself, and your thought patterns.

Think negatively, and your world will be negative. Think positively, and your world will be positive.

I don't hold grudges against people. I don't hate anyone. It's rare for me to hate anyone. I forgive people so that I can have my own peace. For me, peace of mind is key. We have a limited time on this planet. A very short time, at that. Why waste your time getting angry. Why waste your time moping over some sh1t that you know is trivial, or very unimportant? The more you get upset, the longer your give up your peace. And I don't think you should surrender your peace for ANYTHING.

I look into meditation and having a peace of mind. When my mind is still and silent, all answers in my life come to me. I'm at peace; I can move through out the day without being disturbed by outside circumstances.

However, when my mind is running a thousand thoughts a day, I'm angry, I'm sad, I'm annoyed, I let all types of trivial things in life get to me, even the smallest things.

It's like training your muscles/body. You have to TRAIN the mind to be a certain way. It takes time. It's nothing that happens over a couple minutes. It's like a muscle that has to be built.

 

[yungballa]

I think that men growing up today have been convinced by our over-feminized society that they have little to no intrinsic self-worth. Eventually this leads to men believing that they have to do things and have things outside of themselves to attract women.

Men have to realize that women will be attracted to them - or not - regardless of anything they do or don't do. And there is nothing that men have to do except be themselves, follow their purposes and missions, and live their lives, as much as society and women try to convince them otherwise.

hate to double post, but think about it. in these times we've lived with these problems that we've faced, we've found our way to these forums or other places that help us improve, and men are beginning to rise over these problems and conquer themselves, becoming better men than they were before. it's these problems that have caused a spark inside of us all who are fed up with being the loser, and instead we rise over these problems and take whatever we want from life.

it might be a problematic time that we live in, but because of this we've all adapted and risen into our higher selves and became better men.

 

[ubercat]

I got old so tai chi is my current flavour of martial art. They say that you should come to the internal through the external. I would say for the young guys that you should start in a traditional art which has a strong mental and discipline side.

Now the interesting Dichotomy is that these arts aren't always practical for Street defence. Can we make a few suggestions for martial arts that have a reasonable balance. I'll start the ball rolling with Goju karate.

I'd also suggest if you are studying a traditional martial arts that you book yourself in for the occasional mma casual class. This will keep it real for you and put the focus on foot work and keeping a solid guard.

But I don't freak out when the MMA guys kick your ass. Every traditional dojo I've ever trained in has always had guys who I couldn't beat with a crowbar in each hand. I vividly and painfully remember trying to pull a hand trap to take down move against an elderly black belt who simply shrugged off my lead punch, shoulder checked me and threw me to the ground with sheer Physical strength. As Bruce Lee said it's always the man not the style.

And when you go back humbly questioning your sensei about why you got your ass kicked try and ask specific questions EG the mma guys were always rushing me to try and get to my legs. What's a couple of ways of dealing with rushes?

 

[Serenity]

Anyway, this post is intended not to preach.

As I read your post I was thinking you were doing exactly that, then funny enough I get to the bit where you deny doing it just as I thought it. I was thinking this because I've noticed the focus of all your latest posts, it's very philosophical and you're essentially just telling us stuff like a preacher does. Nothing wrong with that, no point denying it.

Anyways, onto the topic. Inner game is nescessary if not humanly impossible to really avoid. I don't think there's a way to stop mental activity while being conscious and not be braindead, something goes on in there at all times.

Our actions are our outer game, it's what we do. Our inner game is why we do it. I believe that anyone who does anything, especially something willed has a motive for their actions. There's always a strong connection between outer and inner game. As I said I don't believe inner game stops, we're just not aware of it and in conscious control of it at all times. People who get easily stuck lack some self-awareness about the workings of their minds, they don't revise their inner games. Some people however get stuck revising their inner games to the extent they end up accomplishing nothing.

I work on a cycle. I set aside time for focusing on my inner game, to reason out why I do what I do. To clarify for myself what can be changed, what I will start doing and what I will stop doing based on recent experience. It's like a system update to make myself run more effectively. The rest of the time I execute it, like a program. With the ultimate goal of maximizing life satisfaction.

 

[JohnChops]

Totally correct.

My intention was to start one inner game thread and then one outer game thread.

I agree with what you say to this extent: a lot of people will say work on yourself, earn money, work out and all that good ****e and as a consequence the women will come flocking.........Well I've known a lot of people who have achieved success, for example a friend of mine who owned his own house at 23, but found that he still didn't have the skill set to chat up women.......but yeah I'm now talking about external success and not the inner game confidence that I initially start talking about......

However, this is something I see a lot................kids that maybe were not good with women and then they learn a few tricks......for example they learn the mystery method and they go out into the field........and maybe they get good.......

.....but then maybe the start to neg.......and then one night they get a girl who negs back.........and they can't handle it......

.....or maybe they have a sexual strategy of girlfriend game and they are told "ok get goo with all women and you'll get good with the one you want" and they get good at getting women and the get a girl but because of inner game issues within a couple of weeks they have fvcked it up............

If you have inner issues, for example, ****e from your child hood and you want a LTR for example.......your inner game will always, and I mean always, fsck it up

YES! I agree with what you're saying brotha. Inner game is a bigger animal to conquor than learning a few tactics to get women. I bet that guy who didn't have the skill set at 23, but had the house, ended up having great inner game and had the tenacity to develop his outer game to get the women he wants.

Going the opposite way leaves gaps in your mind. Mind set is king.