Initiating dates vs complying to dates?

[FlexpertHamilton]

Do you judge a woman's IL based off her willingness to initiate dates/hangouts/etc on her own, or her compliance to hangout when you ask/tell her?

Let's say you initiate the hangouts 9/10 times but 9/10 times she agrees and shows up.

For clarity, I am not talking about initiating texts, let's say she initiates most of the time.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

This is why I advocate going for girls with high genuine interest because you will never have to worry about this. She doesn't see you as a top gun in her eyes and will always give you mixed signals. She is most likely an Alpha WIdow and you aren't good enough to beat the ghost in her eyes.

 

[FlexpertHamilton]

This is why I advocate going for girls with high genuine interest because you will never have to worry about this. She doesn't see you as a top gun in her eyes and will always give you mixed signals. She is most likely an Alpha WIdow and you aren't good enough to beat the ghost in her eyes.

Men lead, women follow. If you wait around hoping they will initiate, that's feminine behavior. That said, intitiating obviously means high IL but you cannot just assume all women will do it all the time. Some women just don't do it, but instead make themselves available and tell you when they're free. Compliance leads to investment since she unconsciously is thinking "I make time for him, therefore I like him".

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Men lead, women follow. If you wait around hoping they will initiate, that's feminine behavior. That said, intitiating obviously means high IL but you cannot just assume all women will do it all the time. Some women just don't do it, but instead make themselves available and tell you when they're free. Compliance leads to investment since she unconsciously is thinking "I make time for him, therefore I like him".

Yes, it's bad if a woman is leading the relationship, but a woman with high Interest will initiate 25% of the time. She just doesn't see you near the Top Guy in her head. It doesn't mean that she won't have sex with you or date you. It just means that you will have to put in more work, deal with more mixed signals, and more shvt tests. She has been imprinted by another guy and you aren't strong enough in her head to replace him. It is up to her to mature out of this and realize that you are her best option.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Nah. Women want you to ask them out. High interest level she will be blowing up your phone right after each date.

 

[bat soup]

Do you judge a woman's IL based off her willingness to initiate dates/hangouts/etc on her own, or her compliance to hangout when you ask/tell her?

Let's say you initiate the hangouts 9/10 times but 9/10 times she agrees and shows up.

For clarity, I am not talking about initiating texts, let's say she initiates most of the time.

Trying to get women to initiate anything is a fool's errand.

 

[Steno]

Every woman is completely different. You have to calibrate to her and take a mental note early on of how she shows investment. For example there are some girls who have high interest but are horrible texters so they only give 1-3 word answers, if you come in with the assumption that short replies = low investment you would be misinterpreting her interest levels.

Compliance is generally the best indicator but you also have to consider the next paragraph...

Every girl has a different baseline level of how she shows investment when her interest level is high. The important thing to always keep an eye on is of CHANGES in their investment-based-behaviors, so if a girl who used to initiate dates 50% of the time starts to slowly drop to 10% then that is when u consider dropping her. If a girl who used to text back in 1-2 hours max is now consistently responding in 5 hours or replying the next day then you drop her. Those type of shifts in investment usually means shes trying to branch swing and is giving you the bare minimum to have you as a back-up option in case the branch swing fails.

Another approach is to screen out chicks who show investment in ways that don't gel with you. For example if a girl always expects you to be the one always asking her out and you don't like being the one to initiate dates 100% of the time then find a more compatible woman. Same goes to girls who want to text or be on the phone too much or whatever random thing it is that doesn't gel with you.