"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Inferiority

priz

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Okay...so when I'm around people I place them in positions, either above or below me. My mind automatically does it for some reason. When I'm around the people that my mind put below me, I act myself, can be funny, and freely speak my mind without any holding back. But when I'm around people who are "above me" I feel kind of insecure and I hold back what I have to say in fear of embarrassing myself.

What is wrong w/ me? Is this natural? How do I get rid of this? I tried tricking my mind but it automatically does it, moreso w/ people who I've known for a while now. Then there are the people who I am more comfortable w/ who I see on my level.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Dante3214

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I understand... this really seems to happen naturally, in my opinion.


But it is really just something burnt into you through your subconscious mind.


Just STAY aware, that's all I can really say, and try to be around people that make you insecure (I feel it may help you), and simply try to do your best.

And don't accuse yourself of doing something wrong!

You aren't putting people "below" you, you just simply don't care when you are around people who's judgements don't affect you, therefore making more attractive/intelligent people harder to be around, in a way.

It all boils down to a lack of self-confidence... and this is also something I struggle with...

But... look at it this way... at least you don't see EVERYONE as higher than you!

:)




Good Luck!
 

toddC

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this happens to me too...i just kept on beign around them...specially in school and it just sort of fell into place that i'm no longer not myself around people taht were "higher" than me
 

Fitch

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This happens to me too. I still act like myself, but it just bothers me.

I am too competitive for my own good, methinks.
 

Damian

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I think the best solution is to be conscious of it, but to train yourself to simply not care. Use it as an advantage. You have an isntant mental indicator of when somebody is trying to AMOG you. Identify the problem and you can use whatever tactics you want to solve it from there.

-Damian
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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cubed

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Ha, I know exactly what you mean!

And I'm pretty sure everybody on this board struggles with this, at least at some point in their lives. We all feel nervous and aren't sure what to say when someone of 'higher' rank shows up. This happens because you want to make a good impression on that person. The only way I can think of improving this is to just hang around more with these people.
 

Damian

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cubed said:
Ha, I know exactly what you mean!

And I'm pretty sure everybody on this board struggles with this, at least at some point in their lives. We all feel nervous and aren't sure what to say when someone of 'higher' rank shows up. This happens because you want to make a good impression on that person. The only way I can think of improving this is to just hang around more with these people.
Excellent advice. To expand on what cubed's brilliant idea: Learn to acclimate yourself with these AMOGS that intimidate you. Join their group and slowly climb up their social ladder. As you have more experience with these types of people, you will feel less uncomfortable and more assured. Dive in, it's the only way you'll get used to the water.

-Damian
 
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