"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Indifference versus ****y and Funny
- Thread starter Juan_Man
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Being ****y and Funny like Negging and other such things reveal to the hot babes that you want to be with them, indifference however makes you appear to be the Prize as you are not showing the hot babe any special attention, which attracts the hottest babes to you, as it makes you look like a guy who doesn't allow a hot babe to fluster or control you, which is a much more powerful tool to be using. :yes:
****y and funny is what girls like. However this puts alot of pressure on you to live up to this and it can get you into the friend-zone fast without you realising it - just keeping you around by showing enough interest because she has a good time with you. Some girls have multiple bfs for this reason (offcourse the guys don't know), some dude for the sex, some for the conversation (he's funny and/or interesting).
What really works is when you are comfortable and genuinely interested in each other. You can easily shut-up and be quite for hours or talk about nothing for hours and it's easy. If it's forced or contrived, you might get a f-close but it won't last.
everywomanshero
Master Don Juan
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Just being indifferent alone can just make you look boring though. I mean assuming you aren't in possession of massively good looks, interesting style, or something that might interest her.. if you just sit like a bump on a log, then she's probably just going to think you're boring or socially unsavy. I create an illusion that I am the most interesting person she could possibly meet. I show her that other girls want me. I create an excuse for her to chase me, like O MY GOD NO WAY and then positioning myself away from her. Women will sometimes chase me now because I dress like a cool guy, but that's usually not enough. Maybe 1 in 10-15 hotties will chase me based on looks/dress, if I want more than that I'll likely have to use some bait.
Distant Light
Master Don Juan
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Yotsuya-san
Senior Don Juan
I read being infifferent as not "trying to be cool" in any way, shape or form, Not just in the sense of C&F. Problem with trying to contrive the "don't give a ****" image is that when all is said and done, you are still deliberately contriving an image. This of course, has it's risks. You do risk dissapearing into the background, but as one gets older and wiser, one realizes the value of being inconspicuous. IDistant Light said:Well I looked up indifference and there wasn't a good definition but i think your talking about disinterest. C&F is a better attitude because your playful. I used to have the indifference attitude but you will lose alot of girls if you stick to it. Another reason is because C&F is so wide that it still conveys disinterest depending on what your saying .
A lot of people believe that eliminating C&F eliminates the potential for humor and being interesting. Not neccesarily. It depends more upon your style. If smart-ass humor (the only humor that works succesfully with C&F) is not your style, then C&F should be avoided. However, more sophisticated dry humor, my type, works well with indifference.