"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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In need of a new start

HardLeftHook

Don Juan
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I'm a college grad. No job(searching though), Biggest problem right now Is I spend too much time at my house. Because I'm introverted by nature(not really "shy") 85% of the time I'm not lonely, but I know I'm not growing and that being lonely is only going to further destroy me. I don't know where to start. I have a a decent amount of friends in the city where my university was, and a few in my hometown. Through poor luck, hanging out with them hasn't really resulted in meeting women.

I live in LA so Its not there arent any around. I just don't know how to really start when I'm essentially by myself.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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RedZone

Senior Don Juan
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You should try to go out by yourself to meet girls. Since your an introvert you might want to start at a place that's not to busy though.
 

SgtSplacker

Master Don Juan
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If you just graduated I would focus on myself first. You can move in with your parents for a year so you're not paying rent. Get that job save up some money and buy a car cash. Heck i've seen immaculate Mercedes CLK all pristine leather going for around $15,000 lately, buy some nice clothes, a little gym time under the belt. Then get an apartment and start dating seriously.

The reason why I would build myself up a bit first is because some social circles require a bit of attention and attendance for you to really be integrated into the group. Maybe they are into traveling and all this basically costs money.:rockon:
 

headFirst

Don Juan
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Everyone keeps saying nice clothes, what do you guys consider nice... Like style, name brand ect..
 

PlentyOfLove

Don Juan
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Jun 6, 2012
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Whatever you feel comfortable in. You don't need an Armani jacket to look good, just something that fits, suits your personality and stands out from the crowd. Doesn't hurt if it's stylish, as well, so don't go buying any skate shoes or caps or whatever. Manly and not boyish, stylish but not feminine.

http://www.kinowear.com/blog/spring-and-summer-2012-essentials

Oh, and always dress to impress when you go out to town. First impressions are everything, and usually that one day when you're suffering from a three-day hangover and didn't care to shave or put on a clean t, the woman of your dreams will appear out of nowhere. By then it's too late, and nobody wants to talk to a guy who looks like a hobo (except other hobos, but you won't get a wife out of that bunch).
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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SgtSplacker

Master Don Juan
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It's hard for me to explain nice clothes, ask a girl-friend that dresses well or a gay dude is the best thing. If they are cool they will understand you are hetro and not make flaming suggestions...
 
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