In a strange relationship

[zinc64]

Ok, there seems to be some good advice on this forum...so here it goes. I met this Korean girl in a bar one night and I left her while talking because I was drunk and didn't give a dman. Anyways, she comes back 30 minutes later and finds me and we leave the bar together and I persuade her to go back to a motel where she wanted to have sex, but I declined because I didn't have a condom.

Anyways, we sleep together and cuddle and all that. She was hestitant to give me her number. First two times I texted her,she said she wasn't sure about me so I wrote her off. Then three weeks later she calls me on a Friday night asking to hang out. I oblige and we end up having sex. We hung out the next three weeknds after that having sex each time. She has revealed to me that she still has a lot of feelings for her ex BF her had to move to his home country to go back to school. She always talks about him and even talked to him once in front of me on the phone. She says that the way he got her was that he didn't act jealous and didn't care if she chose to hang out with other people. She says she hates it when guys do that.

Anyways, last weekend, we hung out the entire weeknd and she said she wants to start a pretend relationship with me where we are only BF/GF when we are together and then we are free. I act cool about it and agree. Th4en I tell her to please not use the word BF because it scares me..even though I really wouldn't mind too much..but this always drives girls crazy I have found out. Anyways, she gets a little concerned and says I must not understand her and I say ok ok..I guess it's ok. Then she says other stuff like she will dress up in a nurse outfit for me on my birthday which is 5 months away.

Then she asks if I will ever invite her to my home country when I move back..in South Korea right now...but I tell her..hey, how do you even know we will know eachother then??? That is a long time away. She acts a little concerned and I say, ok, maybe.

Some more things...she says she wants to meet not next weekend but the next and says that we can both try and meet other people during that time. I say yeah, sounds good...even though it pissed me off no lie. But I played it off.

Another thing...she gave me a huge hickey on my neck on purpose and said you can tell your friends that only a friend gave this to you opr it was an accident.

This girl is pulling a total mind job on me. Anyways, what is the right way to play her to make her fall in love or a have super intense level of attraction and emotion? Me being the rebound certainly isn't helping, but I think I am slowly winning her over even though we argued before we last seperated...she wanted me to ride with her on the subway on the way to her place since my home wasin the same direction..I chose to stay at the current subway stop and watch a movie instead, though.

So what is a good strategy? Should I never call her? I actually do like her and wouldn't mind a relationship. But if she doesn't call this weekend like she is saying, then I will definitely be full force trying to find other girls.

 

[zinc64]

Any advice?

 

[drak_ool]

Anyways, what is the right way to play her to make her fall in love or a have super intense level of attraction and emotion?

fvck her mindless but then you won't be able to get rid of her. I had a South Korean girl as one of my plates for 2 months this summer before she had to go back home and it was a lot of fun. never called her except to get together and have sex or hang out/have sex. never had a fight with her even when she saw me with other girls. according to my friends i was being a dyck to her... i think i was just being a little harsh but she was really into me.

so ya man, stand your ground and like you said, if she doesn't call you next her (for future reference, always be the one making the call, not the one expecting it--that was bad strategy on your part to have her call you and not the other way around)

 

[cyp6]

hmm intersting..

 

[zinc64]

fvck her mindless but then you won't be able to get rid of her. I had a South Korean girl as one of my plates for 2 months this summer before she had to go back home and it was a lot of fun. never called her except to get together and have sex or hang out/have sex. never had a fight with her even when she saw me with other girls. according to my friends i was being a dyck to her... i think i was just being a little harsh but she was really into me.

so ya man, stand your ground and like you said, if she doesn't call you next her (for future reference, always be the one making the call, not the one expecting it--that was bad strategy on your part to have her call you and not the other way around)

Why is not calling bad stradegy? For instance, she said that she wants to wait until two more weeks to hang out again. Should I call her in two weeks? I thought waiting for them to call is best.

 

[AfRoSwiss-Disiac]

Man this aint even worth it..This is like DJ vs DJ.from the sounds of it her bf is a DJ specially if hees got her like that..no point of even pursuing her. Shes def a ho becuase her bf seems to be doin the right thing

 

[zinc64]

Man this aint even worth it..This is like DJ vs DJ.from the sounds of it her bf is a DJ specially if hees got her like that..no point of even pursuing her. Shes def a ho becuase her bf seems to be doin the right thing

he's in another country and won;t be back anytime soon...a couple of years

 

[zinc64]

fvck her mindless but then you won't be able to get rid of her. I had a South Korean girl as one of my plates for 2 months this summer before she had to go back home and it was a lot of fun. never called her except to get together and have sex or hang out/have sex. never had a fight with her even when she saw me with other girls. according to my friends i was being a dyck to her... i think i was just being a little harsh but she was really into me.

so ya man, stand your ground and like you said, if she doesn't call you next her (for future reference, always be the one making the call, not the one expecting it--that was bad strategy on your part to have her call you and not the other way around)

So why is not calling not smart???

 

[lordson]

you want to trick her into falling in love with you when you just want to use her?

piss off

 

[zinc64]

you want to trick her into falling in love with you when you just want to use her?

piss off

No! I really like this girl and would seriously date her. That's why I am being so cautious. Do you have any reading comprehension skills?

 

[drak_ool]

So why is not calling not smart???

here s the deal: use phone calls to set up a date/fvck session. As far as this goes, not calling for other purposes (like chatting with her, finding out how she s doing) is totally justified. HOWEVER, you have to make sure that you re the one doing the calling, not the other way around. If you tell her "just call me when you wanna hang out" you send her the message "hey i m not doing anything with my life, i ll just be waiting around for you to call". It s bad strategy because it gives her power over when (and if) to meet you, so it gives her power over the relationship. If instead you tell her "i m busy next week but i ll give you a call when i find some time to hang out" then you have the leverage in the relationship. In addition, she ll be waiting around, thinking about you, doubting whether you ll call or not, and she ll want you more and more.

remember, love and infatuation are things YOU DO TO YOURSELF. It s while sitting around at home, thinking about that gorgeous girl who you had such a good vibe with last night that you "fall in love" with her. So use this to your advantage.

btw, how are girls in S Korea? are they cute on average? are they less promiscuous than american girls?

 

[MacAvoy]

Your setting youself up for failure. This girl has flat out told you that she will never care for you but she wants you to be her surrogate b/f. She will get all the love from her man overseas but she'll get the physical aspect from you.

This is what all man desire and here you are trying to screw it up by trying to make her love you (something she will NEVER do). Just screw her when its convienent and start looking for a real g/f.

How old are you / she?

 

[DonGorgon]

She is a ho... treat her as such and she will love you for it.... You will never possess her but you will have access to her..

 

[zinc64]

Ok, update. This girl has some baggage for sure. After claiming she wanted to wait two weeks to hang out, she calls me at 1 in the morning last night begging me to tell her how to get to my apartment by taxi. She had never been there before, because I live an hour or so away from her and we always get a hotel. Anyways, I told her no, I have to work and I was serious. Then I got tempted as I started waking up fully from the call as we were talking. So she was upset and I said fine go to such and such bank in Dukea..a small town in S Korea where I live..still don't know my adress because it's in Korean.

Anyways, I walk down to meet her an hour or so later and I told her I wanted to go eat and have some drinks. So we drank a little and ate, and she starts telling me she left her friends birthday party because she missed me so much but then slammed me by saying one opf her other guy friends was low level and I said...how so...she says you know...ind of like you...then she said I was kind of simple. I told her to ****ing leave at once and that I wouldn't put up with any of that bull****. She then gets all nice and starts trying to hand feed me food and asks to wear my jacket while grinning. So, she's wearing my jacket across the table. Then she starts talking about how the truth is that she does want a bf but she is scared of getting hurt. So, I acted surprised and told her I thought you didn't want one..what does this mean? She says nevermind nevermind. I say, we'll have to see. She was pretty drunk when she said all of this mind you.

Anyways, we go back and have sex and I *** very fast..don'ty know why...just did. I tell her, damn, didn't mean to go so fast...she says it's ok, it's ok, you don;t have to do anything for me and starts kissing everywhere for about 10 minutes. Then after about 30 minutes of laying with her, I overto my other bed because that one was too small for two people to sleep. This morning, I get back in bed with her and initate sex...was very good sex too...anyways, I kiss her after for about ten minutes and tell her that I have a very busy day..was true...and I have to get up and get ready. She begs me not to get up yada yadada...I teased her and said somepeople actually have to work...then she tells me to call in sick...I say, that is one thing I don't do is miss work...and I get up while she's still begging me to stay and I get on the internet and make some coffee before showering as she once again begs me to lay down with her.

Then I get out and get back on the computer just messing around...building up her tension. She is askign me to lay down once agin, and I change the subject and ask her what she is doing for Korean New Years..a week a way...she says something that I wasn't really paying attention to. I then say I'm going to Cambodia...she gets dissapointed sounding and says...oh are u sure? I say yeah...almost certain. Then I screw around some more on the computer and come back to lay down. Weare out of condoms at this point. She begs me to have sex with her without a condom and even tries to force me in her saying she just had her period so there is nothing to worry about. I don't have sex without condoms so I told her several times no way. She seemed almost hurt by this. Oh yeah, I forgot to say she also puled this same stunt the night before. Weird. But she was now all over me trying to force sex. It wa shard to resisit I have to admit. So we left on great terms as I had to make her get up shportly after because I had to go to work.

Anyways, for the more experienced guys out there, what does all of this mean. Why the condom stunt and is it just me or is she really falling for me?

PS...sorry to write a whole book on here.

 

[Last Man Standing]

..Some more things...she says she wants to meet not next weekend but the next and says that we can both try and meet other people during that time. I say yeah, sounds good...even though it pissed me off no lie. But I played it off..

Quit being a fool, fool!!! Why are you concerned about a super hor's actions?? Pimp the hor - don't love the hor -- fool!!!!

 

[lordson]

she JUST had her period?

thats alright then

FFS DO NOT have unprotected sex 12-16 days after her period STARTS. thats when she could be ovulating. If shes regular its always day 14. but you still need to keep a few day leway for safety

14 days after the start of her period is when women ovulate. so watch out

and anyway about your situation, dont over-think it. it doesn't really matter. it doesn't seem you relationship can last for a long time ayway. and this isn't reverse sphychology, it jsut dosn't seem that way

ahve fun whilst you still can for as long as you can

 

[zinc64]

Quit being a fool, fool!!! Why are you concerned about a super hor's actions?? Pimp the hor - don't love the hor -- fool!!!!

Dude, you don't even know her. Why are saying hor?

 

[zinc64]

she JUST had her period?

thats alright then

FFS DO NOT have unprotected sex 12-16 days after her period STARTS. thats when she could be ovulating. If shes regular its always day 14. but you still need to keep a few day leway for safety

14 days after the start of her period is when women ovulate. so watch out

and anyway about your situation, dont over-think it. it doesn't really matter. it doesn't seem you relationship can last for a long time ayway. and this isn't reverse pshychology, it just dosn't seem that way

ahve fun whilst you still can for as long as you can

Why couldn't it? She just called me again and wants to come to my place on Saturday and tried to have a phone convo with me but i was in the middle of a movie. She'll be eating out of my hands in no time.

 

[drak_ool]

She'll be eating out of my hands in no time.

Maybe... but my feeling about this whole situation is that you re developing feelings for this girl, maybe even more than you think and even if she does become your gf, you will "fall in love" with her yourself, revert back to your afc ways and then she will run for the hills.

how can i back this up?

1. you started a thread about this girl, which means she s on your mind a lot
2. you are trying to make a girlfriend out of a girl who wanted to fvck the same night she met you in a bar, without even knowing you. This means: her=low value and you=gullible. It also makes me think you re kind of desperate for ass if you wanna establish a relationship with the first (promiscuous) girl you meet.
3. you change your plans to accomodate hers. Granted, you got sex out of it, but this is how you fall into the pvssy trap. again, sign of desperation
4. you are defending her when LMS calls her a hor, which is what he calls all women. For your story she has been acting pretty slutty, you don't know her past so, logically, it s pretty hard for you to defend her

as for the "no condom" stunt: to girls from east/south east Asia, condoms aren't such a big thing. I know this sounds scary but sex without a condom is indeed way better so i can see where they re coming from...
how does this relate to you? this girl has obviously been fvcked without a rubber before, beware of STDs

 

[YOUNG CASINOVA]

Noooo

Why would you want a relationship with this girl? She sounds like a HOE, who knows that she's a HOE.... She just wants you to make her feel special. Especially when she said "PRETEND YOU'RE MY BF when we're together". I say... Hit it when it's available...but don't try to make a relationship out of it, because you're gonna end up pissed when you discover she's kickin it with like 8 other dudes.