In a bit of a predicament...

[PiNkMaGGiT]

I'm in a bit of a predicament fellow DJ's and would love your assistance on the matter. You see I'm a uni student and I met this absolutely awesome babe (HB9/9.5 no seriously she's a published model) at hte beginning of the semester and have been workin on her for the last two months or so. But the problem arises because we've finished the semester and won't be seein each other at uni anymore. She is showing super high IL, she's invited me out with her a few times, new email every second day or so, random msg's on my phone, always tellin me how funny I am and how much I rule etc, kino for no apparent reason, heaps and heaps of intense eye contact all the time etc. I think you get the picture. Problem is, we had this conversation that turned to how friends have hit on us when they're drunk etc and how crap it was. So now I think she might think I'm a bit of an idiot if I try and start anything after we had this big convo on how it's not cool when friends try to get with friends. I know I'm probably just overanalying this but yeah.

What do you think I can do to let her know that I want to maybe turn it in to a relationship. I'm quite sure she likes me and wants to be with me, but I can't for the life of me think of a way to establish the relationship. Any suggestions? By the way I kinda have to act fast because we hardly ever see each other now.

 

[Grey Fox]

If she has maintained a high interest level with you, even after the big convo it might be a test of your interest. Tell her "I think we are meet to be more than friends, I think we can agree that there are things about us that naturally attract us to each other." Or something like that.
If her interest level had declined then NEXT.

-Grey Fox

 

[TesuqueRed]

Pook had something on being afraid of your sexuality. I think you've strayed into this territory. Look it up--

Any way, are you willing to put this connection on the line?

If no, be best of friends (and she'll think you're an a-sexual wanabe-man--buta great friend--or make a move and find out.

You're reading signs and symbols--very necessary for the proper time, but AFTER A WHOLE SEMESTER OF THIS that time is long gone.

The time now is to either act or don't act--no more sign reading.

Maybe she sees you as a friend, and maybe she's been very kind and left the door open for you longer than any self-respecting HB should (full disclosure: I've goofed up those before...it still burns, too...)

Only one way to find the answer. Your job (she did her job already...) is to act first.

Remember this: if you act and it gets awkward and you had it all wrong, under no circumstances apologize or look crestfallen or get hurt. Think "your loss" and walk away.

Can't pull that off? Stay as her friend.

 

[drixsa]

go for it by simply hangin with the girl

at the least she is a good for your visual reseme

being whn other woman see you with such a hot piece of a$$ they will be more inclined towards you

but who knows i find that girls tend to be very contradictive when it comes to attraction

play it ou and go with your gut feeling not your pen15

 

[Gangster Of Love]

She probably metioned the conversation about friends hittin' on eachother when drunk, after numerous signs of high IL, and you doin' nothing about it. Women will say all kinds of things just to get a man to react to them, even when they don't mean it, or are not sure about things.

You gotta make your move fast. Stuff like trying to touch her, like massage, or better yet, create a moment to kiss her. Whatever y you do, you must not 'confess' your feelings or intentions, because you have then given away all the power. Every other guy does that, or acts in a way that lets the hottie know that she is in total control. You must remain actin' all cool but show that you do have a romantic interest. The guys here are right, you don't want to let too much time pass by, it only diminishes your chances.

 

[PiNkMaGGiT]

Thanks guys, I'm glad I got some experienced responses and not something like "look at her eyes and if they're dilated then she likes you".

If I listen to my gut I KNOW she likes me, and my gut has been a pretty good ally in the past (it just... knows). Even after all this time (I'll be the first to admit that I've been too slow on the uptake) she is still showing me high IL, perhaps even moreso now than ever.

She is a really cool person and I would love to have her as a friend, but I want her as something more. It sucks that I have to risk the friendship but a man has to do what a man has to do. It just erks me slightly cause I remember very vividly from that convo we had her saying "there was this one stage where all my guy friends started hitting on me. It was totally gross and they were only thinking with their ****$. I'm not friends with any of them anymore". I don't think she liked these chumps the way I think she likes me though.

I've stopped reading the signs and stuff, I was just tryin to provide some backup as to why I think she digs me.

I've been very careful not to let her know how I feel through my words, i know that is suicide. I've been playin the cool, charismatic, laid back guy for the whole time, every now and then being a little suggestive with my words but mainly conveying stuff through actions. I only really started to do this kinda recently though which may or may not have worked against me. I know I have to act fast but I really don't know what to do without comin on too strong, or makin myself look like a pu$$y.

I was thinkin of tellin her to meet me at uni for a study session in a few days for this exam we have and just puttin the kino through the roof, noticeably more than what I usually do. Then I was thinkin of while talkin to her, interrupting her and sayin something like "you have really beautiful eyes (she does by the way), I just thought you should know". I know it sounds stupid but I reckon I could pull it off. Last time we met we had this huge eye contact thing going where I wouldn't break it, and she didn't want to either. It got so bad (good?) that her eyes started to water. Ha ha it was like a staring competition but we were talking at the same time. Let me know what you think guys.

 

[Jay26]

Yep dude, make a move, and soon! or you'll fark it up. Next chance you get I'd pounce, you're lucky she hasn't closed the door already, so I'd move quicksmart, don't be cautious around a HB they expect you to step up and do something and if you don't you know where you'll be headed soon, and you don't wont to go to that zone!

 

[Walden]

The general rule is this.

Chicks have broader boundaries for friendship than we do. Chicks will hug ther friends, put their arms round their friends , sleep in the same bed as their friends , have hot lesbian sex with their friends , and still it will just mean friends.

On a good day a guy might lend his best friend his spare sunhat , maybe.

SO you cannot be subtle with girl friends , cos really she'll have no idea. If possible actually spell it out to her "I think you're hot and I want to shag you stupid".

But by all means pick your moment.

 

[ulsterman]

Originally posted by Gangster Of Love
You gotta make your move fast. Stuff like trying to touch her, like massage, or better yet, create a moment to kiss her. Whatever y you do, you must not 'confess' your feelings or intentions, because you have then given away all the power. Every other guy does that, or acts in a way that lets the hottie know that she is in total control. You must remain actin' all cool but show that you do have a romantic interest. The guys here are right, you don't want to let too much time pass by, it only diminishes your chances.

This is the wisest advice for you, my friend, so this Gangster seems to know how to "speak of the pompitous of love". Anyway, yes, you MUST get her within kissing distance. You could take her for a short hike in the hills (do you have mountains nearby?) or a stroll along the beach (bear with the influences of my own geographical circumstances here!), as long as there is some "destination", such as a view point or whatever, where the two of you can pause and sit down for a rest. Make sure you sit right beside her and make sure you smell your best, breath and all. Probably the best time to move in to kiss her is one of those moments after you've just said something that made her laugh and now the both of you are thinking about what to say next. Just make sure you're really close to her, so that if you sighed she'd feel your breath on her cheek (but don't sigh on her!). You can move your face closer to hers now, but you have to maintain eye contact in the process. All you'd need are two or three measured stages of movement towards final contact, to allow her a chance to back off if you've mis-read her interest. But once you've connected, you're in - just as long as you don't go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like "I love you". I suppose the other advantage in a stroll over uneven terrain is there is a good chance you can make some sort of physical contact, you know, if she looks like she's gonna fall. Just as long as you don't see it as an opportunity to grab her posterior, for example...

Anyway, best of luck with this babe and don't, whatever you do, let her know you use sites like this.

 

[PiNkMaGGiT]

Thanks again dudes, all excellent advice. Everybody has just basically reinforced to me what I've been thinkin this past week or so. I just hope I'm not too late. I'm starting to get nervous cause last night i was talkin to her over the net and her name was something like "you make me sick" and I asked her what the deal was and she said "oh don't worry about it I'll tell you next time we talk". That made the alarm bells ring. If it's about another dude I'll just say to her something like "I don't want to be the guy that you talk to about all the other guys if you know what I mean" or something similar. Nice post ulsterman, but I live in the city so there isn't really ample opportunity for nice walks along the beach or anything sadly. I know what you're saying though, I have to think of a way to get us both alone so I can see what I can do without the interference of everybody else. I'm definately going to let her know something is going to change next time we meet.