Improvement comes with consequences.

andy87

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Over the last few years I have made major improvements with my looks finances etc, but i feel this comes with some consequences. I have been in a LTR for a year now, but every time I am out with friends etc I attract women a lot easier, I have always attracted women but the
standard of women I am attracting is different territory for me. I'm finding it hard to turn down these women even though I am in a LTR. Think I'm better staying in, then if I become single getting back out there anyone else found themselves in this situation?
 
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Snake-eyes

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But here’s something you should think off. What would of happen, if It was your girl doing the self improvement in her side. And not you ..Do you think she wouldn’t reconsider her options as she’s getting attention that she wasn’t getting before from high caliber men prolly better than you in most aspects. Also have your girl done any self improvement too?are you happy in this LTR?? Do you feel you can get a better girl than your current girlfriend ?
 

andy87

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But here’s something you should think off. What would of happen, if It was your girl doing the self improvement in her side. And not you ..Do you think she wouldn’t reconsider her options as she’s getting attention that she wasn’t getting before from high caliber men prolly better than you in most aspects. Also have your girl done any self improvement too?are you happy in this LTR?? Do you feel you can get a better girl than your current girlfriend ?
Yeah there is every chance she would, isn't this normal human nature? My girl takes care of herself keeps in shape etc, I have noticed she is starting to try and control me more now which isn't something I can handle also I have just moved into my own house and I'm waiting on her asking the question when can she move in tbh I feel once the honeymoon period wears most of them are all the same, if was trying to find more high standard women where is the best place to try and meet them?
 

Black Widow Void

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You described a chapter out of my earlier life.
The reason she's now trying to control you is because she knows that other women are bidding for your attention. Women are very perceptive In fact, for every clue you missed from an outside woman, she didn't.

Your mileage may vary, but here's my story.
In college, I met someone that I was very in sync with. Compared to past girlfriends and dates, she was in a league of her own. It was also around this time that I noticed that I was turning more heads and getting more attention from a higher caliber of women.
My girlfriend's best friend looked like the cheerleader type (which I never had when in high school). The new sudden possessiveness of my girlfriend and the prospect of bedding this 'cheerleader' type ... well, you can get what happened.

I became single. Suddenly the 'cheerleader' girl wanted nothing to do with me. At first I was surprised, but the reality is... she had a challenge and she achieved her goal. On the other hand, I developed a revolving door with other women and it almost seemed like a twilight zone episode. Before I would consider myself 'average' with the girls, but now, things were happening like I would have never imagined.

After a while, it became boring. Sure, it was nice having new 'strange' and all, but they were not interesting beyond that. And as it's been mentioned here, the more disinterested I became, the more interested they became. Forums like this weren't around back then and it really did seem like I was living a twilight zone episode.

I'm now in my 50's. I've got a lot of bedpost notches (and I don't regret that). I've also had countless relationships since the woman I cheated on. However, there's only been two since that woman that truly held any actual value.

If the woman you're with was a result of being a position-filler, then you'll probably enjoy this new adventure. If she is more than this, you could regret it.
 
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redskinsfan92

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Over the last few years I have made major improvements with my looks finances etc, but i feel this comes with some consequences. I have been in a LTR for a year now, but every time I am out with friends etc I attract women a lot easier, I have always attracted women but the
standard of women I am attracting is different territory for me. I'm finding it hard to turn down these women even though I am in a LTR. Think I'm better staying in, then if I become single getting back out there anyone else found themselves in this situation?
Good. Your LTR knows you have options. This will give a natural bit of anxiety that will keep her attraction to you up.
 
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ShePays

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Over the last few years I have made major improvements with my looks finances etc, but i feel this comes with some consequences. I have been in a LTR for a year now, but every time I am out with friends etc I attract women a lot easier, I have always attracted women but the
standard of women I am attracting is different territory for me. I'm finding it hard to turn down these women even though I am in a LTR. Think I'm better staying in, then if I become single getting back out there anyone else found themselves in this situation?
Depends what you really want.

Are the girls approaching you really that much prettier than the girl at home, or are they just new-to-you?

What are you looking for, an LTR with a prettier/younger girl? Or, do want to get some on the side?

Do you want an upgrade or a supplement?

Or, are you just a validation junkie?

If you NEED women to confirm they find you attractive, you're ****ed, no matter what you do.
 

stringpuller

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Over the last few years I have made major improvements with my looks finances etc, but i feel this comes with some consequences. I have been in a LTR for a year now, but every time I am out with friends etc I attract women a lot easier, I have always attracted women but the
standard of women I am attracting is different territory for me. I'm finding it hard to turn down these women even though I am in a LTR. Think I'm better staying in, then if I become single getting back out there anyone else found themselves in this situation?
So whats the problem? Take your LTR out with you to show her off while your subtly enjoying the others attention. Your LTR will be much more fullfilling this way. In the thick of the SMP
 

ShePays

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So whats the problem? Take your LTR out with you to show her off while your subtly enjoying the others attention. Your LTR will be much more fullfilling this way. In the thick of the SMP
Exactly. If all you want is the validation, then, at least, leverage the validation to an actual advantage.
 

andy87

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Thanks for the replies, I'm at the stage in my life where I have realised club and pub girls aren't the sort of girls you want to spend much time with, where are use guys meeting better standard of women and is there such a thing?
 
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