impossible to turn my oneitis into a good girl,what are the reasons for her behaviour

[drift king]

i've come to the realisation that my oneitis girl is just too slick for me, everything about her looks wise and what appeared to be her traits on our first date were perfect but im realising now shes not a good girl, shes playing the field just like DJs do and is really smart about it.

i dont catch onto what she does or say until like an hour after the incident when really i should know straight away.

what has caused this girl to become so coniving?

a broken heart? as i mentioned in my other thread, as i walked by her she was all dressed up and made up, more so than usual but i didnt think anything of it, i just thought she was looking to get picked up rather than going on a date which was my initial thought or maybe looking to impress a certain guy.

i've been ill the past 2-3 days so when i was suppose to make the call to set up our date few days ago i didnt, until yesterday, she didnt answer or call back.

she tried to convince me today she wasnt doing anything this afternoon, so i suggested i pick her up at 2, she then goes on to say shes going to the mountain with her roommate.. i have no idea why i didnt ask her why did she just tell me 2 secs before she was doing nothing. her telling me she'll let me know in a couple hours was just an excuse for her to cancel and flake cos she probably already had a date pre planned.

how do i deal with girls like this? shes just too slick for me.. shes clearly dating other guys at the moment to find the most suitable guy but shes playing me and im always 2 steps behind. i realise now shes not really gf material. is it even possible to have a girl like this as a gf who is so sneaky and secretive?

 

[arutha]

You're only two steps behind because you stopped to smell the flowers and let her get two steps in front. You think she is different to every other girl out there? Why? Truth is, if you let them get ahead, any girl will not just this one. Sure some like to mess around more than others, but none will wait for you.

You do not 'deal with this type of girl', you improve yourself and all of a sudden she becomes the type of girl you want. Clearly other guys think she is acting fine, shes going out with them. What do you do now, in this situation? She clearly doesn't want to spend time with you and is openly disrespecting you by being flaky, stop talking to her. Go and find other girls! You may even find that your withdrawal will make her come crawling back, just don't make the same mistakes again. You are only better than the others if yuo show you are better, not if you keep telling yourself that you are better and should get a fair chance. Life simply isn't 'fair'. There obviously aren't enough bullies at your school to teach you that.

 

[zekko]

I always say if a girl makes you feel bad then she's not good for you.
If she's disrespecting you by lying to you then that's another very big warning sign.

Also, if you are seeing exclusively her, while she's out entertaining other men/options, that puts you in a very weak position with no social proof in her eyes. I would next the girl, but either way you need to have more plates to spin.

 

[DonGorgon]

I have been trying to do the same thing alot over the past year.. but it seems like women meet guys and decide what they wana do either they see you as a F or as potential relationship. its hard to change your status

 

[WC2]

I've come to find that when guys vent about a certain girl, they are not really describing the girl, but how the girl acts when he projects on to her.

In other words, with the right guy she could be the coolest girl in the world, but with some lame duck she may seem like the biggest conniving wh0re you've ever laid eyes on.

The problem isn't her, it's you.

It's only logical that good looking women expect a valued man in return. We can't be hypocritical here. Just like we expect good looking women, they expect the same from us.

Women who know they can get men will always shoot high. If you're not of the upper tier of quality, she'll drop you like a bag of rocks.

So the solution is to work on you.

And oneitis is unacceptable. It happens to everyone yes, but if it's ruining your well-being for an extended amount of time, it's BAD.

Shake this oneitis first of all, and remember to never let a woman get into your head like this again. The only way of doing this is by seeing other women, even if you are still seeing her.

Unless you've agreed on being exclusive, you must not trap yourself into only seeing one woman at a time. This = oneitis. And as soon as she realizes that she is your only option, your value goes down, and she starts to stray for a man of higher value.

This is why a lot of people on this board think 'players' get more women; which is true--but you don't have to be a player to get more women. You just need to make it known subconsciously that you do have other women who are interested in you.

Open up your options.

 

[horaholic]

This is how you deal with ANY, and ALL oneitis situations...


Ready?


You stay away from her, and go after other girls. You know this. When you have a bad habit, you kick it, not change it.

But, like stated above, it is a sign that you need to change yourself.

It doesnt matter why she is the way she is. She was born with a vagina, and raised in a world that worships her sexuality