"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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I'm ugly and with bad reputation.

TheVampSlayer

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I wanna go for this girl, but she is always surrounded by her friends. Most of her friends don't like me, but none of them really know me. I'm also ugly, not impossibly ugly but not handsome by any account. My older brother is handsome and everyone knows him. I'm very smart and sometimes I give the vibe that I think everyone else is stupid. I have rarely spoken to this girl, and I really want a girlfriends. Please help me as much as you can, I will really appreciate it. I'm almost desperate now. General advise would be great, but specific advise for this like a way to make them know that I don't think I'm better than everyone else would be really appreciated. Thanks in advance.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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devilkingx2

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give us a plan and we'll tweak it.
 

Alvafe

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if you say your brother is ahndsome try to let him help you dress better, same genetics, sure as long your brother and you are cool with each other.

but I can tell you thins as long you want a GF you will not get one and if you do will be a crappy one, just let things go, don't build any expectation on it, also try to talk with more people not only girls, guys too, you need to be seen in a diferent light, try to have fun when dealing with people.
 

TheVampSlayer

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I cannot ask my brother for help without him making fun of me, so that's out of the question. I wanna simply approach the group of girls she is in, which is incredibly big, about 16 girls. Some of them will be hostile with me around them, although not only with me, sometimes with everyone. Two of my friends have girlfriends in that group and they all hate spending time with them for the things that I fear will happen to me. They always hang out at the same spot. I plan to join them when they are few when I get the chance, but only if those that are already there are friendly towards me. Then I will stay until more girls arrive. They won't question my being there but I need to find a way to stay relevant in te conversation, since it would be mostly for girls.
 

devilkingx2

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TheVampSlayer said:
I cannot ask my brother for help without him making fun of me, so that's out of the question. I wanna simply approach the group of girls she is in, which is incredibly big, about 16 girls. Some of them will be hostile with me around them, although not only with me, sometimes with everyone. Two of my friends have girlfriends in that group and they all hate spending time with them for the things that I fear will happen to me. They always hang out at the same spot. I plan to join them when they are few when I get the chance, but only if those that are already there are friendly towards me. Then I will stay until more girls arrive. They won't question my being there but I need to find a way to stay relevant in te conversation, since it would be mostly for girls.
I don't know if jumping into a big group of girls by yourself is a good idea.

try to bring friends, make sure you know the girls, it'd be better to seperate her yourself or talk to her when she's alone.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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TheVampSlayer

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That's the thing, she is never alone, trust me, I've tried finding my chance, although I can bring friends. Can you direct me to any good posts about staying relevant in the conversation?
 

Hydra

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First off, don't be desperate for this girl. She is no different than any other girl in the world. I want to stress this because, even if u do get the girl at this point, u won't be able to keep her for long if u develop oneitis (unhealthy dependancy) for her. To avoid getting oneitis, focus on yourself more, and go hunting for girls with a shotgun, not a sniper rifle. Focus your seduction skills on many girls at once, think of every new girl u meet as an opportunity for seduction.

Now, about staying relevant in the conversation. Listen carefully during conversations with her, a girl will always give u new topics of conversation if u just listen. However, don't overdo it, don't lean into her like she is ghandi spitting some spiritually enlightening sh1t. Basically, listen carefully, but make it seem like you're not.

Finally, drop the qualifying mentality. Never feel the need to qualify yourself to anybody. YOU are interesting, funny, mysterious, she needs to win your approval. If you say something irrelevant or stupid during the conversation, don't get embarrassed, u should be thinking "I say whatever the fvck I want, whenever i want, to whoever i want" Not "o fvck o fvck i said the wrong thing!"
 

sylvester the cat

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TheVampSlayer said:
I cannot ask my brother for help without him making fun of me, so that's out of the question.
what kind of a brother is this that he would make fun of you instead of helping you out?
 
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