"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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I'm tired

Tazman

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STR8UP said:
Maybe she's just one of those chicks who grew up thinking that the man needs to do the pursuing. I dunno.Is it the Muslim upbringing? I'm close to the point where I don't want to put any more effort into it. I'm used to interested women taking a little more initiative.
Exactly! In fact, when you're with a woman who is interested, your "initiative" is usually required simply to seal the deal, but you will get a little nudge, even from the shy women.

Finally becoming able to deal with my fears lead me to "escalate" but when a woman is into you, she really makes it easy. I know I posted on this before but I think you're a good guy and you need to cut yourself loose from this chick, sounds like she's stringing you along.

If I'm not mistaken, isn't this the chick that you already did sexual things with but she wouldn't let it go any further as in actual intercourse?

Keto's a good guy but I feel like his advice has been giving you false hope.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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grinder

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STR8UP said:
This is a forum to discuss the ins and outs of dealing with women. But any time you try to look a little deeper that the surface, any deeper than what we already know, you automatically get told "you think too much".
I plead guilty as charged.

My point is not that you think too much; it is that the further down the rabbit hole you go the more you enter her world.

Like Al in womanland: You don’t belong there and by the act of being there your perceptions are altered. You lose your objectivity and you cannot think your way out of it because clear thinking is the very first thing you lose.

But I digress….

I don’t think it’s too deep to simply apply the things you learned long ago regarding the dinner party.

She expects and NEEDS you to lead. Take command. Assume control.
 

jophil28

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ketostix said:
I lived in Dallas in the the 80's, but not currently. Small world. The weather is even more changeable a few 100 miles North of Dallas.
How about Sulphur Springs ? I think it was (is) about 60 miles NE of Dallas.
- I can't recall with any certainty. It has been a while since i visited with Uncle Sam.
 

STR8UP

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grinder said:
Like Al in womanland: You don’t belong there and by the act of being there your perceptions are altered. You lose your objectivity and you cannot think your way out of it because clear thinking is the very first thing you lose.
This is no doubt the truth, and it is possible that it HURTS my "game" to dig deep, but it helps me on the other side, the side that feels the need for wisdom and enlightenment.
 

STR8UP

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grinder said:
She expects and NEEDS you to lead. Take command. Assume control.
Going back to the whole point of this thread.....I'm TIRED. I am sitting on the fence about not even contacting her anymore just because if it has to be this much effort it isn't worth it. I mean, can you really "date" someone seeing them once every few weeks? Really, what's the point if I haven't even been able to get her into the "third date" position where sex is implied, pretty much forcing her hand?

I would hate to let something go when all it would take is one little push, but I'm tired.....
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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ketostix

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Tazman said:
Exactly! In fact, when you're with a woman who is interested, your "initiative" is usually required simply to seal the deal, but you will get a little nudge, even from the shy women.

Finally becoming able to deal with my fears lead me to "escalate" but when a woman is into you, she really makes it easy. I know I posted on this before but I think you're a good guy and you need to cut yourself loose from this chick, sounds like she's stringing you along.

If I'm not mistaken, isn't this the chick that you already did sexual things with but she wouldn't let it go any further as in actual intercourse?

Keto's a good guy but I feel like his advice has been giving you false hope.
I agree with that. But what I suggested for Str8up to do was make one more effort to lead her to a meet up and escalate on her before dropping her. It was just my impression that while sure this girl is a lot of hassle, Str8up was playing it pretty disintersted and not very persuasive. If he could make definitive plans and meet up with her and close her the dynamic could change. And if she didn't come through on the plans then cut her off.

It's starting to look like things with this girl have dragged on a little too long and she's hung up on her ex. If a meet up and escalation isn't going to happen soon, then it's best to just dop her.
 
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